U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 08-28-2017, 10:44 AM
 
1,774 posts, read 2,446,014 times
Reputation: 5169

Advertisements

Sadly, I know of several instances where elders were scammed out of a lot of money. My stupid mother was $5,000 behind in property tax and so my sister offered to pay it and told my mother that in order to do that, my mother had to put the $250,000 lake home in my sister's name. That is the only asset my mother has. So now.... my sister owns the lake home, my mother lives in a small house in town (I paid for half of that many years ago!) and she reversed mortgaged that to the eyeballs (it's lost when she dies). And.... my brother and I will inherit nothing.


Here's another one - an old lady shows up at my door one day. I ask "who are you?" She explains she is a neighbor and needs me to give her $27,000 to send to her boyfriend who is somehow 'trapped' in Thailand, in jail, blah blah blah. Apparently she met this guy on line and he has a charming oriental accent he acquired while going to college in China (spare me!) and there is some huge misunderstanding with police in Thailand and when he gets the $27,000, he'll return to the USA and marry this old lady. Can you believe it? The woman told me she is totally broke and has been scammed 2 times previously but this is true love and not a scam. When I told her to go away she started crying. She really believed I was going to just give her $27,000
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 08-28-2017, 11:20 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,275 posts, read 6,356,923 times
Reputation: 9900
Money magazine recently had an article of a lady who is 60, went on match.com to meet people to alleviate her loniless after her husband passed away, she was scammed $1.1 million by some young guy with a charming British accent, whom she never met in real life, only online. So he was caught and put in jail but she was out $1.1 million and no sex was involved yet.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-28-2017, 12:00 PM
 
Location: Dover, DE
1,803 posts, read 3,838,565 times
Reputation: 2499
I don't doubt that these stories are true, and I know there are a lot of people out there trying to scam the elderly, but be sure of your facts before you accuse anyone. I'll tell you my story.

After my Dad died my mother went downhill fast. I had actually been taking care of her bills as she kept forgetting to pay them. So once a week I would go over and pay all the bills. She put me on her checking account so I could just sign the checks. After he died she also put me on other accounts so that I could take care of her. When she had to go into assisted living, I went ahead and took care of everything. I am the only one, so it all fell on me. I had an uncle who got all up in arms about it and called me one evening practically accusing me of stealing money from my mother. I told him it was none of his business and that I never took a penny that wasn't for something for her. I talked to a cousin later on and found out why he believed this. Apparently I had the nerve to take my mother to her brother's funeral in a brand new full sized Buick. Well, of course, in his eyes I MUST have used her money to buy it since I wasn't working at the time. If he had only asked instead of gossiping behind my back, I would have explained to him that during the 10 years that I traveled on business I had built up enough points with National Car Rental's Emerald Club that I earned the use of a full sized car for a year. We parked our personal car and put the miles on the rental. He didn't ask, so I never told him. Again, not his business.

Of course this is the same uncle who went into the hospital when my Mom was there and got information from the nurses by pretending he was my Dad. When the nurses mentioned about my Dad being in earlier, after being totally stunned, I told them that it would be impossible as my Dad had been dead for 4 years! I had to sign papers so that he couldn't get any information without my consent.

I do, though, get really angry with people who feel they can take advantage. Should all be in jail!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-28-2017, 01:04 PM
 
Location: Omaha, Nebraska
7,328 posts, read 4,172,231 times
Reputation: 18387
Quote:
Originally Posted by LivingDeadGirl View Post
Here's another one - an old lady shows up at my door one day. I ask "who are you?" She explains she is a neighbor and needs me to give her $27,000 to send to her boyfriend who is somehow 'trapped' in Thailand, in jail, blah blah blah. Apparently she met this guy on line and he has a charming oriental accent he acquired while going to college in China (spare me!) and there is some huge misunderstanding with police in Thailand and when he gets the $27,000, he'll return to the USA and marry this old lady. Can you believe it? The woman told me she is totally broke and has been scammed 2 times previously but this is true love and not a scam. When I told her to go away she started crying. She really believed I was going to just give her $27,000
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbieHere View Post
Money magazine recently had an article of a lady who is 60, went on match.com to meet people to alleviate her loniless after her husband passed away, she was scammed $1.1 million by some young guy with a charming British accent, whom she never met in real life, only online. So he was caught and put in jail but she was out $1.1 million and no sex was involved yet.
These are the sorts of stories which scare me: fraudsters taking advantage of elderly people with cognitive issues (possibly not formally diagnosed yet). Protecting yourself from scammers isn't hard if you have all your marbles, but how do you protect yourself from yourself? (Specifically, how do you protect yourself from age-related cognitive dsyfunction that leaves you unable to recognize a scam or responsibly manage money?)

I just updated the beneficiaries on my retirement accounts to leave money to several charities. These reflect my true wishes, as my mind is fine right now. But what if, years down the road, i start developing dementia like my grandmother and my mother? How can I set things up to insure I don't later change those beneficiary designations to leave everything to some sweet-talking criminal?

When my own parents pass on in the not-too-distant future, I'm going to need to schedule some appointments with a good attorney well-versed in estate planning and elder-care issues to find out what my options will be in order to best protect myself as a potential future "elder orphan."
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top