U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-01-2017, 07:27 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,313,926 times
Reputation: 9827

Advertisements

There is a bit of my husband in all of your husbands. I planned for retirement, but he did give input as to what his preference city. So we bought there. It turns out that was the right decision. Before we retired, he said to get a decent house so we can have space. I have my sewing room and tech space. He has his man cave. While he doesn't eat Little Debbie cakes and drinking game soda, he does read a lot online and newspaper, and watch all kind of sports. But he at least he is not grumpy and sour, and does fix a lot of things in the house.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-01-2017, 07:33 AM
 
Location: The sleepy part of New York City
1,945 posts, read 1,203,775 times
Reputation: 4317
Quote:
Originally Posted by LookingatFL View Post
I have the same situation, except it is my husband who leaves me to do the planning. He just keeps saying that whatever I choose is fine. That really is no help. I am left to figure out the finances, choose where and how we will live.

His idea of retirement is sitting at home 24/7 and watching TV. He wants an in-home theater so he can watch movies. That's it. That's what he is going to do for the rest of his life.

I figure I am going to have to pick a place that will make me happy, and I will have to find friends and do things with them. Being shy, I am not looking forward to this. That's why I am thinking that maybe it will be best if we are in a 55+ community; that way I will be forced to be around people. Maybe I will decide that I want a part-time job to also keep me occupied.
I have friends in over 55 communities and the one thing they all tell me is that when you hear that ambulance siren.. you know what happened. We were considering an over 55 too but when I heard those friends talk about it we changed our mind. It sounded depressing. An over 55 community doesn't guarantee that there will be things to do either, or community events planned. It all depends on the people who live there and how involved they choose to be and who's going to take the job of event director, IF anyone is willing.

So.. we decided to look into yacht club memberships. The one we're interested in right now has a huge pool which would be great for us and less work than having our own. We don't even own a boat but you don't have to to join. We belong to the one where we are now and there's usually something going on all the time. From dinners to Chinese auctions, barbecues, holiday get together s etc. We just go to the events we feel like going to. If there's nothing going on the bar is usually open and there's always someone to talk to, Yacht club sounds so snobby and like it's for rich people, but it's really not. I'm sure there are some but not the ones we belong to. Lol I have yet to meet someone who owns a yacht. There are even some lake clubs that do similar things. You might want to look into them too. Good luck!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 10:56 AM
 
12,825 posts, read 20,132,535 times
Reputation: 10910
Quote:
Originally Posted by mschrief View Post
What is it with the old guys? My husband is exactly this way. He would sit on the couch, watching Fox News, Pawn Stars or American Pickers, whilst eating his Little Debbie cakes and drinking soda if he had his way.

I plan nice trips and he says he doesn't really want to go, etc. I am ten years younger than he is. He's been retired six years and I am retiring in December. I almost dread dealing with his grumpy, sour moods.

Pray for me!
Well, well. The typical stereotype was that it's us Gen X and younger who are slackers. But what I see is a lot of Boomer couch potatoes, especially Boomer men.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 11:08 AM
 
Location: The sleepy part of New York City
1,945 posts, read 1,203,775 times
Reputation: 4317
Quote:
Originally Posted by BayAreaHillbilly View Post
Well, well. The typical stereotype was that it's us Gen X and younger who are slackers. But what I see is a lot of Boomer couch potatoes, especially Boomer men.
I think that's because those Boomer couch potatoes have worked all their lives and finally have a chance to relax. My husband is currently catching up on all the shows he missed while working 2 jobs. . Carol Burnett.. Laugh In. yeah, all those old shows.

Seriously though.. I don't paint any group with a broad brush. There are slackers and workaholics in every age group.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 11:44 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
7,627 posts, read 4,686,468 times
Reputation: 27902
Quote:
Originally Posted by mschrief View Post
What is it with the old guys? My husband is exactly this way. He would sit on the couch, watching Fox News, Pawn Stars or American Pickers, whilst eating his Little Debbie cakes and drinking soda if he had his way.

I plan nice trips and he says he doesn't really want to go, etc. I am ten years younger than he is. He's been retired six years and I am retiring in December. I almost dread dealing with his grumpy, sour moods.

Pray for me!
I just returned from a week-long solo trip. I would have been gone longer but had to come back for a medical procedure.

You know how you're on vacation but it takes a couple of days before the "vacation vibe" sets in? I was in Sedona, having breakfast on the terrace overlooking the golf course, scenic red rock backdrop. Ahhhh.

I did whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. I soaked my knees in the hot tub while reading Michael Crichton's autobiography. I took the time to talk to the locals without someone pulling at my elbow and saying, "Let's go. I'm bored."

Solo vacation. I highly recommend it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 11:56 AM
 
Location: middle tennessee
1,924 posts, read 988,107 times
Reputation: 6931
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliedeee View Post
I think that's because those Boomer couch potatoes have worked all their lives and finally have a chance to relax. My husband is currently catching up on all the shows he missed while working 2 jobs. . Carol Burnett.. Laugh In. yeah, all those old shows.

Seriously though.. I don't paint any group with a broad brush. There are slackers and workaholics in every age group.


Thank you! I am also enjoying a leisurely retirement.


I have my busy days but I spend some time curled up on the sofa, too. Don't miss the Little Debbie Bat Brownies


I am single. I think the problem arises when people have different ideas of what it means to "retire", or that couples have had a lifetime of work and only now have to face the differences in their personalities.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 12:42 PM
 
Location: equator
3,431 posts, read 1,527,565 times
Reputation: 8499
Really interesting to see others' replies.


We totally agreed on retiring here, the type/size of condo, and the opportunity for social interactions that come with condo living. We have a much more active social life than we did in the States, and a much wider circle of acquaintances/friends. All our age, though this is not technically "over 55". It just is.


Even without cars we are able to partake in lots of get-togethers or road trips.


The problem is, as others have lamented---the level of activity desired by one not matching the other.


Husband's idea of retirement bliss is sitting immobile on the couch, shades drawn against the spectacular ocean view, in dim light, a hot (to me) room, just surfing the Internet. I am just agog at this.


The activities available are mostly two-or-more-person: Ping-Pong, badminton, Frisbee. I'd do them all alone if I could. At present, there's not another woman to do these with. I guess I'll start walking on the beach by myself as it's like pulling teeth to get him off the couch. And do my Spanish lessons alone.


I love our location but at present life is really boring and I'm not sure how to fix it. Definitely retirement means different things to different folks and you may not find out until you are entrenched in it. I have to say, I'm disappointed and tired of starting arguments over these differences.


The positive aspect is having separate areas of the condo to be alone, separate room air-conditioners, 2 full bathrooms. A pool to retreat to. Others around to talk to, do things with.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 02:03 PM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,313,926 times
Reputation: 9827
We should be able to do different things. I'm linked by the hips with my husband, well most of the time. But lately he likes to walk vs go swimming with me. When I take classes, he gets to listen to music that he knows I don't like. It's normal.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 06:23 PM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,546 posts, read 39,924,861 times
Reputation: 23663
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliedeee View Post
... My husband is currently catching up on all the shows he missed while working 2 jobs. . Carol Burnett.. Laugh In. yeah, all those old shows.
....
I hope I never have to catch up on the programs I missed, left the TV behind in 1968 (next 40 yrs... working nights and farming / homeschooling during the days...)

I will probably take a Lawrence Welk DVD to my final abode / senior home. One will do, I won't remember I saw it 4 times each day anyway. My choice of Senior homes is on the site of a Waterpark!!! (Thermopolis Hot Springs!) Little time for the TV tube, I will be wearing my INNER tube (duck) FLOATY!. Just bring me plenty of swimsuits... I will wear them out on the waterslide!

DS says I will be VERY lonely..

Doubt it
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-01-2017, 07:12 PM
 
Location: Location: Happy Place
3,688 posts, read 1,866,292 times
Reputation: 11301
Quote:
Originally Posted by BayAreaHillbilly View Post
Well, well. The typical stereotype was that it's us Gen X and younger who are slackers. But what I see is a lot of Boomer couch potatoes, especially Boomer men.
Seems like old guys (mine is 71) just want to sit.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top