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I brought it up because for women it is a very big part of our "getting older". While we are in the middle of it, I think it is most certainly tied to how we deal with our feelings about aging.
Not for everyone, certainly not for me, my only reaction was "finally!"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuggy
So I am not getting "over it" , I am embracing it . There is this moment when you hit a certain age (different for everyone) where you really don't give a rats backside what anyone thinks and you focus on the quality of your life and it isn't defined by whether a man notices you or not.
Whatever age I'm attending to..Is the best age to be. Next year I'll continue that mantra. You can do the same.
It's not my business what YOU think of me. Be it my physical self or my life choices. Once I 'got' that..I enjoyed others more and certainly have less pressure to 'un' age.
It also surprises me that so many women who have had cancer or other major illness feel that they lived through that so what's another operation or treatment to look better. They hate what the sickness has done to their bodies. So while they are having breast reconstruction they'll also get some other procedures done.
Funny, being diagnosed with breast cancer at 36 didn't change my views about surgery for cosmetic reasons. I thought it was self indulgent and unnecessary before and still do now. Losing a diseased chunk of myself and ending up with a pretty impressive scar really didn't bother me. What cancer DID do was teach me what is more important.....living life in a genuine honest manner and not to sweat the small stuff that can't really be avoided. I have never cared much about appearance; a good thing as I was a gawky knock kneed skinny teenager, a clumsy gawky shy adult, and am now a gawky, clumsy, shy senior, never one to attract much attention at any age. Maybe that taught me how superficial looks are, so not worth struggling over. I've had the luck and privilege of a 34+ year profession in wildlife biology I cared about very much. I know that I am an ethical, open minded, and hopefully a kind hearted person, and sometimes people comment on this. That means so much more. The extra pounds, a wrinkle or sag somewhere doesn't. I could have been dead a long time ago.
Last edited by Parnassia; 09-09-2017 at 12:53 AM..
It also surprises me that so many women who have had cancer or other major illness feel that they lived through that so what's another operation or treatment to look better. They hate what the sickness has done to their bodies. So while they are having breast reconstruction they'll also get some other procedures done.
They can't wait to get back to an exercise schedule and take back control and feel more like their old selves.
Yikes, I've had plenty surgeries, don't want any extras done!
Well, I did think about asking the last doc to do a tummy tuck while he was in there...
So I am not getting "over it" , I am embracing it . There is this moment when you hit a certain age (different for everyone) where you really don't give a rats backside what anyone thinks and you focus on the quality of your life and it isn't defined by whether a man notices you or not.
^^^^^^This.^^^^^^
Of course I miss my younger, thinner body and my natural hair color, who wouldn't? But I am happy to be 68 and wouldn't go back for anything. I've gained wisdom and perspective, I've learned to accept myself as I am, and I'm happy to leave glamour and sex appeal to the young. When you've reached a certain age, those superficial things don't seem important any more. It's liberating!
Well, aren't you lucky! This is exactly what I was writing about. Women are so mean to each other. No supporting; just judging.
Just realize your experience is not the normal and for some of us it is a different journey, including suffering with health issues.
Projection!
YOU are the one being judgemental - calling her mean when all she was doing was reassuring that menopause does not have to be hell.
Like her, I had no negative symptoms, it was very easy.
You are the mean one for putting those unnecessary fears into young womens' heads. She may or may not experience difficulties. Certainly she is not doomed to suffer Hell! That's a terrible thing to put into someone's head!
In society we are only valued for being beautiful/attractive to men.
To be happy with ageing you have to not accept what society says about women or accept or more feminist version.
Unfortunately while young women are happy to be ant feminist as they have the attention of men not realising this will fade.
It is such a complete non-issue that I'm surprised there's even a thread about it.
Probably this thread should be in Psychology, and the question should be more along the lines of "Why do some women (in the U.S.) fear aging?"
And most of the answers would be about mass media archetypes, societal pressures, and so on.
Has there already been a thread in Psychology about why some people, especially women in 1st world countries, feel the need to have plastic surgery?
I just think plastic surgery for non medical reasons is weird, sad, strange, creepy, and I don't understand it at all.
If someone is worried about future health problems, it's easy enough to take preventive measures. Beyond that, worrying about something that might happen just isn't productive. If something happens in spite of having lived a healthy life, all one can do is deal with the problem as it comes.
I'd advise OP to eat properly, exercise, get plenty of sleep, meditate daily, and see a Psychologist.
I am still young certainly, but have to admit I worry about getting older. Call me vain but while I know I am no super model by any means, it is something I think about.
What is the point of worrying about it? It is going to happen. Age is truly just a number. Stay physically active and keep your weight down. I am 60. I feel great! I will retire in 6 months and I am looking forward to having the time to walk the dogs by the lake, swim laps in the pool, putter around the house, volunteer in my community....being master of my own time! This was not a luxury I had as a full-time parent and full-time employee. Each stage of life brings opportunity. Embrace it!
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