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Old 09-20-2017, 11:44 AM
 
Location: Central NY
4,666 posts, read 3,241,188 times
Reputation: 11932

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On one of the rare occasions I've had a relationship with my daughter, we were riding somewhere and I noticed guys noticing. I had always had that happen and it made me feel good. But then I realized..... hey they weren't looking at me...... they were looking at my daughter.

What a hoot. Lesson in humility, for sure.
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Old 09-20-2017, 11:46 AM
 
3,604 posts, read 1,642,138 times
Reputation: 13548
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
women have their "standards" also. I do anyway. No long scraggly unkempt hair or beards. Must also not be more than 20 lbs overweight.

I presume you are talking about dating choices and if so so be it, we all have our preferences. If you have a specific preference when dating and then choose to marry someone I would hope that you are clear that if your spouse cuts their hair or puts on weight you are done? that way they can avoid marrying you or marry you and abide by your rules
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:04 PM
 
7,798 posts, read 4,385,889 times
Reputation: 11589
It's not just you, Long Hair Guy... I got a "wild hare" one day and decided to cut my shoulder length hair into what I thought would be a cute pixie cut (it ended up looking just, well, masculine) and, as a single woman, I can attest that MOST men prefer longer hair on a woman. The difference in their reaction to me with the new cut was palpable and not in a good way. Granted, I probably don't have a pretty enough face to carry that look off, and men are definitely visual.


Some women chop their long hair off after the last baby is born or when they reach a certain age at which longer hair is considered inappropriate. That sometimes conveys the message, "closed for business." If a mate didn't like that, I wouldn't blame him or consider him shallow.
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:06 PM
 
6,309 posts, read 5,051,434 times
Reputation: 12815
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuggy View Post
I presume you are talking about dating choices and if so so be it, we all have our preferences. If you have a specific preference when dating and then choose to marry someone I would hope that you are clear that if your spouse cuts their hair or puts on weight you are done? that way they can avoid marrying you or marry you and abide by your rules
And I agree with that - set the rules
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:08 PM
 
3,373 posts, read 3,783,373 times
Reputation: 4189
Quote:
Originally Posted by otterhere View Post
Some women chop their long hair off after the last baby is born or when they reach a certain age at which longer hair is considered inappropriate. That sometimes conveys the message, "closed for business." If a mate didn't like that, I wouldn't blame him or consider him shallow.
My husband says this too. Therefore, I keep mine long. It doesn't really take any extra work, I don't do anything to it but wash, squeeze in some product, and blow dry my bangs. And when it does look bad, I just blame the convertible and/or the boat.
All four of his sisters have short hair.
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:12 PM
 
3,604 posts, read 1,642,138 times
Reputation: 13548
Quote:
Originally Posted by otterhere View Post
It's not just you, Long Hair Guy... I got a "wild hare" one day and decided to cut my shoulder length hair into what I thought would be a cute pixie cut (it ended up looking just, well, masculine) and, as a single woman, I can attest that MOST men prefer longer hair on a woman. The difference in their reaction to me with the new cut was palpable and not in a good way. Granted, I probably don't have a pretty enough face to carry that look off, and men are definitely visual.


Some women chop their long hair off after the last baby is born or when they reach a certain age at which longer hair is considered inappropriate. That sometimes conveys the message, "closed for business." If a mate didn't like that, I wouldn't blame him or consider him shallow.

I would if he dumped his wife for cutting her hair and she had no clue that cutting her hair was going an issue. Different if a partner makes it clear before marriage that he wishes to control his wife's choices or that she is not allowed to cut her hair.
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:20 PM
 
Location: PNW
2,474 posts, read 904,415 times
Reputation: 8312
As for getting over it.... Well, I haven't. Not really. I didn't look forward to it, either, but I couldn't stop time, so I had no choice but to go with it. And every day I am reminded that I'm getting even older.

But.... I just retired and I'm in BLISS to have reached that milestone! I'm also still upward and moving and have interests.
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Old 09-20-2017, 03:14 PM
 
Location: Georgia
4,562 posts, read 4,092,983 times
Reputation: 15768
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aeana View Post
I am still young certainly, but have to admit I worry about getting older. Call me vain but while I know I am no super model by any means, it is something I think about.
Hehehe . . . I think it entirely depends on how you view yourself -- if you are obsessed with the calendar and view yourself as getting old and washed up, then you'll probably tend to lean that way. Age is all in your head. But I have to admit, I do adore being older in one sense -- I don't put up with crap from anyone, anymore. I got to a point where I realized, except for VERY few exceptions, I just didn't give a flip what people thought of me. THAT was extraordinarily liberating. :-)

I don't worry about it. I'm 60. Most people think I'm in my 40's. My one concession to my age is my monthly visit to a very good colorist, and my refusal to chop my hair short. :-) Other than that, I am in a happy marriage of over 30 years and I have two adult kids who are a constant source of joy and pleasure. Taking care of diet and exercise is second nature after doing it for so long, so nothing new, there -- my husband and I regularly do 30-60 mile bicycle rides each weekend. I work in a field that I enjoy and provides new challenges every day, I have friends with whom we are able to share our life's joys and griefs, and my husband and I have made sure that, barring a sudden apocalypse, we will be able to be financially independent for a very long time when we choose to stop working. Right now, we both enjoy our work and can't imagine not working (it's not working if you love it!) But if that changes -- we're ready.

Yes, it sometimes takes me a little longer to hop out of the car these days, but at least I can still hop if I have to. :-) Yes, I've had to learn to adjust my makeup to compensate for changes in skin texture and shading. No, I don't wear short-short skirts. No, I don't wear leggings. :-) I stay pretty tech-current and love to read just about anything.

What I DO fear is a possibility of memory impairment, health issues beyond my control (cancer, etc.) and loss of an ability to manage my own life. I've seen it with my father, and now my mother. But I don't spend time worrying about it. Cross that bridge if/when I get to it. Meanwhile -- life is good.
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Old 09-20-2017, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Former LI'er Now Rehoboth Beach, DE
7,869 posts, read 10,553,387 times
Reputation: 7952
Seeing as I prefer the choice of getting older to death, I don't view it as something to get over.
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Old 09-20-2017, 04:40 PM
 
5,461 posts, read 2,922,392 times
Reputation: 24517
I am about to turn 60 and I don't know how to handle it. I don't feel 60. However I look in the mirror and see wrinkles. I see loss of hair. I hear young people at work call me Ms GiGi.

People view me as being older. I don't feel older. With time I assume I will accept it.
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