U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 10-03-2017, 09:41 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,293,458 times
Reputation: 1988

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
Your husband is 66. Do you expect him to work until age 76 so you can have insurance? And you have the nerve to accuse him of being selfish?
Wow, some of you really don't read the whole thread do you? But you love to get all judgmental don't you?
I'll just leave it at that.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 10-03-2017, 10:01 AM
 
13,872 posts, read 7,381,208 times
Reputation: 25346
Quote:
Originally Posted by CindyRoos View Post
Wow, some of you really don't read the whole thread do you? But you love to get all judgmental don't you?
I'll just leave it at that.
It's 19 pages. Why would I bother? You really expect your husband to work until age 76 so you can get health insurance? It's not like his getting to 66 and wanting to retire should have come as any shock to you. You should have planned for this eventuality years ago instead of complaining that you don't want to change jobs at 56 to an employer who actually offers health insurance. Most of us don't have that option. Why aren't you taking some control over your life instead of being the victim?

I'm 59. I was unemployed last year. I don't have someone supporting me. I did what anybody does. I went out and found a job to support myself. You're 56, not 106. You should have been job hunting long ago.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Ohio
194 posts, read 116,015 times
Reputation: 282
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
You really expect your husband to work until age 76 so you can get health insurance?
She NEVER, EVER said she expected her husband to work longer! How many times does this have to be repeated?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 11:23 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,293,458 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
It's 19 pages. Why would I bother? You really expect your husband to work until age 76 so you can get health insurance? It's not like his getting to 66 and wanting to retire should have come as any shock to you. You should have planned for this eventuality years ago instead of complaining that you don't want to change jobs at 56 to an employer who actually offers health insurance. Most of us don't have that option. Why aren't you taking some control over your life instead of being the victim?

I'm 59. I was unemployed last year. I don't have someone supporting me. I did what anybody does. I went out and found a job to support myself. You're 56, not 106. You should have been job hunting long ago.
BaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaa.....

You say "why would I bother"....It's called getting the full story before you make a negative comment. But, not that I owe you this but , No, I have said I don't expect my spouse to work any longer.

Good Lord.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 11:24 AM
 
292 posts, read 125,424 times
Reputation: 392
Quote:
Originally Posted by dwnmo View Post
She NEVER, EVER said she expected her husband to work longer! How many times does this have to be repeated?
I read this whole thread and every few posts, someone comes out and suggests that the OP expects the DH to continue to work until he drops over dead....not so...I never saw her state this as an option.

Sounds like some people are projecting their personal angst onto the OP..."I have to work, provide insurance...Yada, Yada.... do you think that you are better than me...Miss Princess?

Are the responders with this attitude "bitter much"?....one poster in particular, by the moniker "Jane Smith" or something similar, really showed her hand in responding to the OP. Several posters shared with others on the thread that this "Jane Smith" person had been divorced twice. Perhaps not the best person to be offering up martial advice and "opinions"

Op's hubby is from the older generation, and may not understand that second marriages present a whole different set of issues when facing retirement. There are most likely other financial issues that we are not privy to in that regard. It would be completely foolish for the OP to post such matters from a personal security perspective.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 11:33 AM
 
6,303 posts, read 5,042,575 times
Reputation: 12799
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celiene61 View Post
I read this whole thread and every few posts, someone comes out and suggests that the OP expects the DH to continue to work until he drops over dead....not so...I never saw her state this as an option.

Sounds like some people are projecting their personal angst onto the OP..."I have to work, provide insurance...Yada, Yada.... do you think that you are better than me...Miss Princess?

Are the responders with this attitude "bitter much"?....one poster in particular, by the moniker "Jane Smith" or something similar, really showed her hand in responding to the OP. Several posters shared with others on the thread that this "Jane Smith" person had been divorced twice. Perhaps not the best person to be offering up martial advice and "opinions"

Op's hubby is from the older generation, and may not understand that second marriages present a whole different set of issues when facing retirement. There are most likely other financial issues that we are not privy to in that regard. It would be completely foolish for the OP to post such matters from a personal security perspective.
hey - wouldn't the more times you are married, the more experience you have? And know when to get out? lol

And yes, I've been married twice. Never again. And what about kids - I don't have any - but I was a kid once and know how I would want to have been raised.

Maybe the OP just came off wrong - scared about the situation? But she does work in the medical field sort of - so should have more knowledge than the regular joe off the street?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,293,458 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celiene61 View Post
I read this whole thread and every few posts, someone comes out and suggests that the OP expects the DH to continue to work until he drops over dead....not so...I never saw her state this as an option.

Sounds like some people are projecting their personal angst onto the OP..."I have to work, provide insurance...Yada, Yada.... do you think that you are better than me...Miss Princess?

Are the responders with this attitude "bitter much"?....one poster in particular, by the moniker "Jane Smith" or something similar, really showed her hand in responding to the OP. Several posters shared with others on the thread that this "Jane Smith" person had been divorced twice. Perhaps not the best person to be offering up martial advice and "opinions"

Op's hubby is from the older generation, and may not understand that second marriages present a whole different set of issues when facing retirement. There are most likely other financial issues that we are not privy to in that regard. It would be completely foolish for the OP to post such matters from a personal security perspective.
Thank you and very well said.

I think, going forward, I will have to generalize my thread posts as much as possible. Sometimes it's hard to know what to say exactly yet not give away too much personal info on the internet.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 11:42 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,293,458 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
hey - wouldn't the more times you are married, the more experience you have? And know when to get out? lol

And yes, I've been married twice. Never again. And what about kids - I don't have any - but I was a kid once and know how I would want to have been raised.

Maybe the OP just came off wrong - scared about the situation? But she does work in the medical field sort of - so should have more knowledge than the regular joe off the street?
My company does life insurance exams. We send tech's out to do medical history, vitals, collect specimens. (I work in the office and am in charge of hiring new tech's and being some of the examiner's "coordinator" ) I really wouldn't say it's in the Medical field but perhaps in the "Health and Wellness" field.

I'm sure this will all work out the way it should. My youngest will graduate from HS in May. I will then, most likely, look for a job closer to home that offers benefits (Health insurance, etc.)
If we decide, instead, that we will "pull the plug" and move to Florida as we had always talked about---I will just get a job there.

Have to go with the flow.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 01:05 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
9,741 posts, read 7,022,649 times
Reputation: 14219
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celiene61 View Post
I read this whole thread and every few posts, someone comes out and suggests that the OP expects the DH to continue to work until he drops over dead....not so...I never saw her state this as an option.

Sounds like some people are projecting their personal angst onto the OP..."I have to work, provide insurance...Yada, Yada.... do you think that you are better than me...Miss Princess?

Are the responders with this attitude "bitter much"?....one poster in particular, by the moniker "Jane Smith" or something similar, really showed her hand in responding to the OP. Several posters shared with others on the thread that this "Jane Smith" person had been divorced twice. Perhaps not the best person to be offering up martial advice and "opinions"

Op's hubby is from the older generation, and may not understand that second marriages present a whole different set of issues when facing retirement. There are most likely other financial issues that we are not privy to in that regard. It would be completely foolish for the OP to post such matters from a personal security perspective.
Exactly. The OP asked for advice or suggestions for getting health insurance once her husband has retired and she no longer has it. She didn't ask for marital counseling and IMO it's pretty presumptuous to project one's own feelings or experiences on another person, let alone an individual they know nothing about except for a few comments on an internet forum..

As I think one other poster suggested, this is likely a pretty common problem as one spouse retires and goes on Medicare, and the other much younger spouse loses the insurance they had. It is interesting to see how people handle that situation.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-03-2017, 01:40 PM
 
5,419 posts, read 3,440,673 times
Reputation: 13654
Jane_Smith73 at her posts #103, #105, #106, and #107 did not give "marital counseling" nor "marital advice".

She was stating that a woman should be proactive in being able to financially support herself and proactive in being aware of impending changes that retirement will bring financially and in benefits. And proactive in finances and financially planning over an adult lifetime. And that a woman should make and have her own money and benefits. And for optimal choices not be financially dependent upon a man. And to take responsibility.

I agree with what Jane_Smith73 said in her posts. She is not a 'troll'. She stated important points.

Last edited by matisse12; 10-03-2017 at 01:49 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top