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Old 12-28-2017, 06:24 PM
 
259 posts, read 133,434 times
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Goals seem more obtainable than dreams.
My observation anyways.
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Old 12-28-2017, 06:58 PM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,628 posts, read 39,998,659 times
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Yeah,,, the dream that never came true... Life...

was OK while it lasted, but always more of a nightmare than a dream (Abusive parents / 30+ yrs of caring for them... now caring for others.... ) so goes it.
Maybe next time...

But... I have been blessed and know it, certainly nothing went as planned / dreamt . probably best that way.

Bo choice!
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Old 12-28-2017, 07:19 PM
 
Location: Canada
5,762 posts, read 4,179,208 times
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I honestly thought that on my 50th birthday that I was going to see a Jaguar coupe out in the driveway. Nope. I was a bit disappointed, but not overly so.
That was over 10 years ago and now I could care less about having a sports car. I don't want to look like a silly grey-haired old granny driving around in a snazzy car like I see some doing. I also see 80+ men driving around in sporty little cars with the tops down and the wind blowing across and the sun shining down on their balding heads. It looks utterly ridiculous IMO. Unless they are a VERY young 80+, they could be a danger on the road in a speedy car. A lot of them shouldn't be driving by that age anyways, but adding a fast sports car to the mix is even worse.
They should just get over the idea like I did.


Yes, although a Jag would have been a fun luxury car when I was younger, I am now very happy to have a brand spanking new Volkswagon Atlas sitting in my garage.
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Old 12-28-2017, 07:22 PM
 
6,323 posts, read 5,067,075 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gouligann View Post
I honestly thought that on my 50th birthday that I was going to see a Jaguar coupe out in the driveway. Nope. I was a bit disappointed, but not overly so.
That was over 10 years ago and now I could care less about having a sports car. I don't want to look like a silly grey-haired old granny driving around in a snazzy car like I see some doing. I also see 80+ men driving around in sporty little cars with the tops down and the wind blowing across and the sun shining down on their balding heads. It looks utterly ridiculous IMO. Unless they are a VERY young 80+, they could be a danger on the road in a speedy car. A lot of them shouldn't be driving by that age anyways, but adding a fast sports car to the mix is even worse.
They should just get over the idea like I did.


Yes, although a Jag would have been a fun luxury car when I was younger, I am now very happy to have a brand spanking new Volkswagon Atlas sitting in my garage.
lol - I see an older gentleman tooling around in a Jag in our small rural town.

My 70 something older sibling has a red Camero convertible.
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Old 12-28-2017, 07:36 PM
 
Location: No where Nebraska
102 posts, read 124,365 times
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I was hoping to move out of this no where State after I was a caregiver to two Alzheimer's parents for 15 years and a brain injured significant other. Lost the parents in 2015, partner was injured in 2014, it literally took the very life out of me and financially ruined me. My dream of leaving is gone and no future plans are set. I'm 60 and my health is ruined from the stress of care giving.
Funny how life can really turn a 360* and leave you in a desert.
So, I'm trying to find purpose and other outlets in a dreary place. I keep my pipedream in my heart so maybe my pipedream will spring a leak!
The best to you on your dream, never give up and hold fast.
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Old 12-28-2017, 07:52 PM
 
6,323 posts, read 5,067,075 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by denimflyz View Post
I was hoping to move out of this no where State after I was a caregiver to two Alzheimer's parents for 15 years and a brain injured significant other. Lost the parents in 2015, partner was injured in 2014, it literally took the very life out of me and financially ruined me. My dream of leaving is gone and no future plans are set. I'm 60 and my health is ruined from the stress of care giving.
Funny how life can really turn a 360* and leave you in a desert.
So, I'm trying to find purpose and other outlets in a dreary place. I keep my pipedream in my heart so maybe my pipedream will spring a leak!
The best to you on your dream, never give up and hold fast.
Good luck to you also
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Old 12-28-2017, 08:46 PM
 
2,630 posts, read 1,938,761 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger View Post
We always expected we would have grandchildren, and retained toys and other items in accordance with that expectation. We now realize it will likely never happen as both of our sons and their wives are aging out of the maternity years.


So now we are making plans to stay active in our upcoming retirement in other ways. And will likely start, in a couple more years, to donate, sell, or otherwise dispose of the items we saved for grandchildren that we will never need.


Your post reminds me of something that occurred to me recently.


My (now entirely late except for me) family consisted of 4 boys and 2 parents (typical in most every way). My mom's lifelong dream was to one day, lead the hokey pokey at her son's wedding reception. Drat. None of us ever married. 3 never cared much for girls and one just went West coast hippie.


Poor thing. Despite all the nudging and matchmaking attempts, she went to her deathbed never getting to do that lead the hokey pokey thing. I do sorta feel guilty.


To get to my point, I've been moving "stuff" I've had for thirty years and haven't used in 20 of those years, from one niche to another for 10 years now. An upcoming move (and a handy large dumpster out back) will take care of that (I hope).


Count your blessings (after all, you got to lead the hokey pokey and the bunny hop too, maybe), ...and donate the stuff - maybe to some relatives who will be having kids.


P.S. Is there a Chutes & Ladders game? Keep it. I still have ours. My neighbors and I like to play "Chutes & Ladders in Reverse." Do something bad, you go UP the chute. Do something good, you fall down the ladder. The most juvenile delinquent wins! Loads of fun.

Last edited by TwinbrookNine; 12-28-2017 at 09:20 PM..
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Old 12-28-2017, 08:47 PM
 
Location: Kirkland, WA (Metro Seattle)
4,008 posts, read 3,263,936 times
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Many things in life you don't "think" you can have, you can with sufficient motivation to obtain them. Half the things on OP's list qualify.

The other half take the acquiescence of people, and that throws a wrench into fulfillment sometimes. People cannot be bent to our will, or not for long anyway: they tend to escape when the situational arbitrage, as I call it, passes:

Frustrated spouses walk out
Frustrated kids grow up and find a way out
Jobs too good to be true usually pass due to some kind of change

As for moving where I wanted, check and check. I went where the work was, which was where I wanted to be. The work is elsewhere, too, but huge amounts of it near and dear to what I love in life. In fact there is if-anything more this kind of work in places like WA DC and Boston, where I wouldn't live for all the tea in China, as they say.

Can't have marriage without love, or not for long, see second paragraph. Since I by-and-large don't care about others to that extent, must accept the inevitable outcomes (chuckle). Fool me once, shame on you; fool me two, three, or maybe half-dozen times, I'm hitting the eject button and should have wised up years earlier clearly. Dealing with women and insane emotional problems is for the birds, the juice has never ever justified the action.

Travel? Save money, plan it out, or work smarter at your job to make more money. I travel where I want, which is damn few places anymore because I've seen the vast bulk of the U.S. so "why." It's do-able, I've been on some epic adventures in life.

I don't have any more dreams that haven't been fulfilled in-toto due to the application of sufficient willpower (career, education, etc.)
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Old 12-28-2017, 08:55 PM
 
6,323 posts, read 5,067,075 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TwinbrookNine View Post
Your post reminds me of something that occurred to me recently.


My (now entirely late except for me) family consisted of 4 boys and 2 parents (typical in most every way). My mom's lifelong dream was to one day, lead the hokey pokey at her son's wedding reception. None of us ever married. 3 never cared much for girls and one just went West coast hippie.


Poor thing. She went to her deathbed never getting to do that hokey pokey thing. I do sorta feel guilty.


Count your blessings, and donate the stuff.
I was asked about the no kid thing recently. My communion sponsor has three kids and none are in relationships or have ever been married. They are probably in their early 40s. She knew I didn't have kids and I guess wanted a second opinion. Her daughter had told her that she just didn't have the urge. I told her that I had felt the same way. Never felt the urge to have kids. She is okay with never being a granma, but her hubby - not as much. Who knows maybe the two sons can still produce one day?
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Old 12-29-2017, 06:09 AM
 
Location: Ypsilanti, MI
2,452 posts, read 3,670,532 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gouligann View Post
I honestly thought that on my 50th birthday that I was going to see a Jaguar coupe out in the driveway. Nope. I was a bit disappointed, but not overly so.
That was over 10 years ago and now I could care less about having a sports car. I don't want to look like a silly grey-haired old granny driving around in a snazzy car like I see some doing.
Following my first retirement I bought myself a summertime fun car - with full support (and almost insistence) from my wife. I deliberately bought myself an older convertible, a 2000 SAAB Viggen model, because I feel an older guy driving an older sporty car looks less pathetic than the same guy driving a spanking new sporty car.

I looked at a number of MGA cars almost as old as myself, but after comparing the size of these cars to the other vehicles on the road, realizing these cars have no modern safety features, and that the side windows are only pieces of plexiglass clamped into place without seals, I opted to go more modern for a car I drive to work ocassionally (at my post-retirement job), which can cruise on the expressway, and drive to long distance car shows which may involve driving through inclement weather.
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