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I've been quite orderly with the things one can keep in order (bills, timely phone calls, logistics of selling/building house, retiring). Let the Brazilians go who cleaned my house in anticipation of being on fixed income. Dog hair becomes an art form.
I don't expect my dogs to make life orderly. It's a pleasure of dogs, them being themselves (as I gather cats are, too). Being without familial relations, lumpiness is rare with friends. Perhaps I am missing something, I don't know, but don't seem to find much difficulty with people. Maybe that's because I've lived alone for 41 years and counting. Always wished for a husband-style man in my life who either lived across the street or a plane flight away. We shall see.
I had a husband type for over ten years. Then his secret life was discovered. He was removed from my life. I haven't been able to extend sufficent trust to any other person since to replace him. But I've come to have a system. Money is handled carefully and with proper preparation. The bills are all on autopay, but when I check the balance I check which has not paid and subtract so I know exactly what is left. I give myself some nice things, like Dish. And of course the internet. Because of the internet I can order and control the spending on my needs. And my fourlegged kids, dogs and cats, are well tended to as well.
I don't go much of anywhere, but that's okay. I have plenty to do. I really need to finish this one story so I can post the rest before nobody has read the first part.
I'd love to have more money and be able to have more fun, but I also love the laid back life I've come to have where I control what I can and build a hedge for those things which I can't.
I know some people where I am feel badly as if they've failed, but if you come to a place where baring the unpredictable, you can feel secure, you're doing okay.
So if someone else simplifies their life, they are heading for dementia. If you do it, that frees up your time to do something else.
This constant need for movement reminded me of my friend the other day.
She could not think of what to do with two hours of her time this last Sunday. Her usual Sunday activities had been curtailed, so she just drove around until her next "appointment"
My father always told us to "go scratch your feet" if we had nothing to do. Sounds better in Spanish. What it means is to go contemplate your life! No need to be constantly amused by outside activities and actions.
Somehow you just have to make it more complicated. Why different colors for the same shoes? Mine are a neutral gray color. Pants are all khaki or similar. I have not found anything that really lasts so I usually buy 2 pair for winter and 2 pair for summer. At least that way 4 pair will last for several years. I typically also have an extra pair of shoes in the back of the closet for replacement use when needed. I have 4 dozen socks set aside for when the current batch needs to be replaced in another year or so. I went overboard on shirts. I bought an extra batch of 10 shirts for $33 delivered. They are pocket polo shirts that last forever. Never fade, do not pill, do not appear worn. I have at least 30 in rotation and have been wearing the same batch of shirts for many years. Only 2 look bad. I splashed bleach on one and another got hit with some expanding foam insulation that will not wash out. Shirts provide my color variation and are red, maroon, grey, brown, blue, navy, green, yellow, or black. I was thinking of standardizing on maroon, but I will never wear out the shirts I already own.
I still retain one set of fancy clothes from when I worked: black shoes, white shirt, blue blazer and a choice of red ties for weddings and happy occasions and black for funerals. Daughter #2 forced me to buy a suit for her wedding this past Fall. I doubt that will be worn again.
As you can imagine my expenses for clothing are pretty minimal. Probably $100/year for shoes, $100 for pants/underwear/shirts and maybe $40 for a replacement winter coat or some other similar item. This year I really splurged on accessories. I bought a Tilley hat for about $75.
Many forms of shoes make my feet hurt. Boots tend to be more comfortable. I discovered Bearpaw lined boots a while ago, lined in fur, and buy about a pair a year. The new one is there for good stuff. The older I wear around the house. They start getting damaged, its yard boots. I have other boots, errrr boots are my thing.... but I only begrugingly wear sandles in the summer when the boots are too hot.
I love being able to dress myself as I wish and nobody is going to tell me not to.
Before I go to bed the coffee maker is set up with coffee and water. When I worked I used a pot with an automatic timer. Now I get up at different times and have to turn it on manually. That is usually about all I can handle for my first 10 minutes of being awake.
Best invention EVER: the coffeemaker with a timer. Waking up to freshly brewed coffee is a real blessings!
I'm an organized person - that is my happy place. In general I try to set-up everything so I handle it pro-actively, not re-actively.
With an impending move (2 years, told you am proactive ), we are downsizing. I would like to keep it that way to minimize housework and the like.
I HAVE had to learn that my husband is not "as" organized as me, and let that go.
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I HAVE had to learn that my husband is not "as" organized as me, and let that go.
I have the same issue with my wife. Her disorganization causes her lots and lots of work and problems. I long since have given up trying to make help or recommendations. Every once in a while she about gives up and asks for some help. By then it is usually too late. That happened again last week. She had not backed up computer files and still refused to do a full, organized backup. She needed to back up and clear files from her computer's hard drive, but the back up discs were full of half done and disorganized files. We had to go out and buy another set up backup hard drives. Even then she "did not have time" to organize her laptop files so her newest backup is also incomplete and disorganized. So after 12 hours of copying files, she still has a mess.
I try to let go, but often it is really difficult.
I have the same issue with my wife. Her disorganization causes her lots and lots of work and problems. I long since have given up trying to make help or recommendations. Every once in a while she about gives up and asks for some help. By then it is usually too late. That happened again last week. She had not backed up computer files and still refused to do a full, organized backup. She needed to back up and clear files from her computer's hard drive, but the back up discs were full of half done and disorganized files. We had to go out and buy another set up backup hard drives. Even then she "did not have time" to organize her laptop files so her newest backup is also incomplete and disorganized. So after 12 hours of copying files, she still has a mess.
I try to let go, but often it is really difficult.
What do you mean by "organize her laptop files" It seems her back up would be of what she
has on her laptop.
Are you most frustrated about how she organizes her files on her laptop or the backup issue??
My house is my sanctuary. As such, I have designated it a drama-free zone.
I have streamlined my life down to its bare essentials and identified my priorities accordingly.
I live very simply. I have always been a minimalist and can honestly say that I have everything I need.
My dogs and I are healthy and active. I am not wealthy, but life is good and I am content.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jrkliny
I have the same issue with my wife. Her disorganization causes her lots and lots of work and problems. I long since have given up trying to make help or recommendations. Every once in a while she about gives up and asks for some help. By then it is usually too late. That happened again last week. She had not backed up computer files and still refused to do a full, organized backup. She needed to back up and clear files from her computer's hard drive, but the back up discs were full of half done and disorganized files. We had to go out and buy another set up backup hard drives. Even then she "did not have time" to organize her laptop files so her newest backup is also incomplete and disorganized. So after 12 hours of copying files, she still has a mess.
In my case it's not 'what', it's 'who' . . I make it so.
Or, I could make it lousy.
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), we are downsizing. I would like to keep it that way to minimize housework and the like.
