U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 02-10-2018, 10:01 AM
 
Location: Sylmar, a part of Los Angeles
3,976 posts, read 2,535,133 times
Reputation: 8492

Advertisements

I'd like to see my ex wife, it's been decades. She was really pretty and sexy. Has she gotten fat? Is she still attractive? how has she aged?
We lived in a small rural not really even a town in Oregon from age 7 to 13. I have many fond memories but none of my family has any pictures at all of there. Thanks to City Data I have found out it hasn't developed at all and I know that if I ever go back to look around to not be dissapointed.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 02-10-2018, 12:23 PM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
56,004 posts, read 54,508,374 times
Reputation: 66349
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr5150 View Post
I understand what you are asking. We are all different. Me: a year and a half ago (6months into retirement) I realized that the past is not part of my life. Worse yet, by not focusing on today and digging out momentos of the past was not healthy. My past is not bad or sad. Just not a healthy option for me. Me being the operative word. I love today and I have no desire to revisit my past life.
I like this a lot.

I feel the same way. Everything that happened to us in the past has brought us to where and who we are now, but picking it up and looking at it too much causes us to miss what is now.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 12:50 PM
 
28,231 posts, read 39,872,938 times
Reputation: 36735
Last year I was contacted by someone I went to high school with. We hung out after and after we both got married we saw each other as couples. He joined the police force and we drifted apart, which is not uncommon.

I think the last time we saw him was late 1980's.

They were traveling and were going to stop in Las Vegas so we decided to get together. We invited them over and it was like we'd seen them last week.

An amazing visit.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 02:32 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,939 posts, read 5,295,505 times
Reputation: 17896
I really don't want to see anyone from the past. We all change over time. I'm not the same person and neither are they. Everyone we have met had a small part in making us who we are today. That never changes.

I decline all friend requests from former coworkers, classmates, old drinking buddies, and relatives. I only friend people that are in my life now.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 03:00 PM
 
6,306 posts, read 5,046,206 times
Reputation: 12805
Quote:
Originally Posted by V8 Vega View Post
I'd like to see my ex wife, it's been decades. She was really pretty and sexy. Has she gotten fat? Is she still attractive? how has she aged?
We lived in a small rural not really even a town in Oregon from age 7 to 13. I have many fond memories but none of my family has any pictures at all of there. Thanks to City Data I have found out it hasn't developed at all and I know that if I ever go back to look around to not be dissapointed.
i'm facebook friends now with my first ex husband. He still looks the same, well less hair -
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 03:50 PM
 
764 posts, read 53,867 times
Reputation: 475
I lost my wife not very long ago. I was and still am lonely, especially because we had no children. I tried looking up some old buddies where I grew up. We hadn’t seen each other for a long time so there wasn’t much to say.

It was a little better with guys I knew in the military, we had been in combat together. But after reliving that, which helped some, we didn’t have a lot left to say.

So for me, its better to let the past go.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 07:41 PM
 
6,294 posts, read 3,566,992 times
Reputation: 21987
About a decade ago I got a phone call from my sixth grade teacher who was in decline. She told me she was calling former students who had significance to her in her classroom Then she said some very kind things to me. Made my day.


So with her idea prompting me I began to make my own list of people in my life who had made a difference. Little by little I am crossing them off my list. For some it's too late.


I'm not calling them directly. It's not a renewed relationship I am seeking but rather an opportunity to tell them just what it was about them or what they did that influenced me. To that end I'm writing a brief thank you note.


Some have responded and others haven't. A response is not necessary. I just want to thank them and perhaps to give them a small token of the gift of knowing. Who wouldn't want to hear they made a difference even if it were just for one person?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 08:47 PM
 
Location: Southern California
23,644 posts, read 8,227,438 times
Reputation: 15437
There are two significant people in my life and I've tried to find both, one girlfriend and one old beau....could not locate and I thought I tried pretty hard...but I've given up...don't care anymore.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 08:51 PM
 
Location: Southern California
23,644 posts, read 8,227,438 times
Reputation: 15437
Quote:
Originally Posted by eric johns View Post
I lost my wife not very long ago. I was and still am lonely, especially because we had no children. I tried looking up some old buddies where I grew up. We hadnít seen each other for a long time so there wasnít much to say.

It was a little better with guys I knew in the military, we had been in combat together. But after reliving that, which helped some, we didnít have a lot left to say.

So for me, its better to let the past go.
I lost my sister to MS and she and her family are in the East. I call by bil every month or so to say hi and see how he's doing...they have one grown daughter. He and my sis were married close to 50 yrs and he's telling me he's got a new woman friend who lost her husband to MS, so they have that in common. He needs friends...and women too.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-10-2018, 08:57 PM
 
Location: God's Country
5,188 posts, read 3,501,064 times
Reputation: 8689
Quote:
Originally Posted by TMKSarah View Post
Have you ever wondered what happened to those people in your life that had gave you something in the relationship with them that at the time it seemed an experience but years later realized that those experiences have shaped you.

Yeah, I called them mom and dad.


But I know what happened to them.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top