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Old 02-09-2018, 04:14 PM
 
Location: next up where ever I go
588 posts, read 344,665 times
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Have you ever wondered what happened to those people in your life that had gave you something in the relationship with them that at the time it seemed an experience but years later realized that those experiences have shaped you. Or at least for me. A handful, still I feel a calling to reach out to them. I realize it may be a futile gesture. People change and it has been a very long time.

There are certain people that came into my life that I could contact from many many moons ago that the memories keep coming back to me....

I realize the past is past...

But still.

I may be setting myself up for pain by calling these people, however, why not. Take a gamble. Enjoy the ride.
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Old 02-09-2018, 04:39 PM
 
641 posts, read 530,331 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TMKSarah View Post
Have you ever wondered what happened to those people in your life that had gave you something in the relationship with them that at the time it seemed an experience but years later realized that those experiences have shaped you. Or at least for me. A handful, still I feel a calling to reach out to them. I realize it may be a futile gesture. People change and it has been a very long time.

There are certain people that came into my life that I could contact from many many moons ago that the memories keep coming back to me....

I realize the past is past...

But still.

I may be setting myself up for pain by calling these people, however, why not. Take a gamble. Enjoy the ride.
Not sure if this is what you mean. But I worked for a guy in my earliest full time working career. He was hard driving, difficult and demanded production and quality. I went from greenhorn to supervisor over 12 years under his watch. I learned so much from working for and being around him. Unfortunately he left the company and soon after tragically killed in a accident.
I think about him often and wish I could have told him how much he influenced my work and personal life. If he was still alive I definitely would have been in touch with him.
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Old 02-09-2018, 04:45 PM
 
Location: next up where ever I go
588 posts, read 344,665 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovnova View Post
Not sure if this is what you mean. But I worked for a guy in my earliest full time working career. He was hard driving, difficult and demanded production and quality. I went from greenhorn to supervisor over 12 years under his watch. I learned so much from working for and being around him. Unfortunately he left the company and soon after tragically killed in a accident.
I think about him often and wish I could have told him how much he influenced my work and personal life. If he was still alive I definitely would have been in touch with him.
Yes, that is what I mean. Thank you for helping me clarify to myself what I am trying to do.

Love love
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Old 02-09-2018, 06:20 PM
 
Location: Sierra Nevada Land, CA
8,395 posts, read 9,141,441 times
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I understand what you are asking. We are all different. Me: a year and a half ago (6months into retirement) I realized that the past is not part of my life. Worse yet, by not focusing on today and digging out momentos of the past was not healthy. My past is not bad or sad. Just not a healthy option for me. Me being the operative word. I love today and I have no desire to revisit my past life.
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Old 02-09-2018, 06:46 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,972 posts, read 3,457,347 times
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Wow, you've brought up quite a topic!

I remember the first woman supervisor I had who is really believed in me. She helped me get my foot in the business world & set my place for the future.

I've never forgotten her but it's never crossed my mind to get ahold of her, especially since it's been so many years.

Thanks for bringing back that memory.
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Old 02-09-2018, 08:21 PM
 
Location: Florida -
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About 10-15-years ago, I went back and looked-up some neighbors from 40+ years prior who had made it their business to get my sister and I to church, church camp and various other activities. By then, I had been in the ministry for 15+ years and wanted to thank them for their outreach and influence on my life. The man was in his late 80's/early 90's and seemed almost overwhelmed by the influence they had (unfortunately, his wife had experienced severe dementia and was living in a 'memory care' facility).
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Old 02-09-2018, 08:35 PM
 
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I moved back to my small home town, so I am surrounded by my former teachers and others that sort of guided me in life.

I love seeing them and always give them a big hug - especially my favorite math teacher.

I remember one professor in university - probably already passed away. He told us that when he was in college, he worked full time, had a family, and was attending uni on the GI Bill, so didn't want to hear any excuses about not having time to do our assignments.
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Old 02-10-2018, 06:40 AM
 
12,692 posts, read 14,074,796 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr5150 View Post
I understand what you are asking. We are all different. Me: a year and a half ago (6months into retirement) I realized that the past is not part of my life. Worse yet, by not focusing on today and digging out momentos of the past was not healthy. My past is not bad or sad. Just not a healthy option for me. Me being the operative word. I love today and I have no desire to revisit my past life.
I appreciate, or in some cases just accept the past, but life only moves in one direction..."like the sun rushing to its setting as soon as it has risen." I went back for a day-long visit to the wonderful village of my childhood some thirty years after I had left. It wasn't there. Most of the buildings were still there, much of it looked as I remembered it, a few of the wonderful folks of the past were there but they were people thirty years different. But there were also a lot of dramatic visible as well as economic changes.

It was not an unpleasant experience, but what was clearest was that I had not been able to visit my old home because it has passed away. It exists only as mostly very pleasant memories.

There is famous novel with the title You Can't Go Home Again. This sentiment is unpalatable to a lot of people, but it is no less true for that.

I have a few very attractive mementos around my home which once belonged to people I held dear. I only fleetingly think about those people now in relation to what were once momentos. When I pick them up now after so many, many years of having them, I appreciate that they are nice things in their own right...and I enjoy them mostly for themselves. Perhaps a bit of irony in that as I expect that is how their original owners enjoyed them.
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Old 02-10-2018, 07:07 AM
 
Location: NC
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I suppose it depends on whether you are fairly happy with how your life ended up today. When you mostly are appreciative of how others either guided or mentored you in both small and large ways, it is kind to let those people know. Retirement allows time for contemplation, and since your mentors are probably older than you and maybe slowing down either physically or mentally, it is especially kind to help them feel like what they did for others decades ago had a good and appreciated outcome. Just a note or a short message, if you can find them, can mean a lot.
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Old 02-10-2018, 07:24 AM
 
1,137 posts, read 569,984 times
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Yes, but the reach-out can have unexpected results . When I was young, I fortunate to be introduced a great, kind, guitar-teacher when I was learning to play. He was an old blues player from way back, and taught me about blues from people I had never heard of; Elizabeth Cotton, Charley Patton, Bukka White... our experience together lasted two years until he said I had learned all he could teach, now it was up to me to practice, practice. I followed his career as a folk musician for a few years, then life got in the way, and lost track. I became a professional musician for a while because of him, and cherished the time he gave me while I was learning. For some reason, one evening in 2008, I had an immense urge to contact him and tell him how much his kind guidance had shaped my life; not only as a musician, but as a person.

Dived into the internet to find out where to reach him...found he had died one week prior to my search. I'm still not over the regret of not waking up sooner.
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