"Are You Old? Infirm? Then Kindly Disappear." (yelling, respect, best) - Retirement -Social Security, age, moving, relocation, finance, savings, early, hobbies, nursing homes - City-Data Forum

Cida · 02-18-2018, 04:21 PM

Maybe this is the best forum for this? I'm not sure. It's about the dismissive way that older people are treated.

Are You Old? Infirm? Then Kindly Disappear.
By Frank Bruni

“They think I’m mentally incapacitated,” she said.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/12/16/o...disappear.html

soulsurv · 02-18-2018, 07:03 PM

Distressing but probably quite accurate. Nancy sounds like a fascinating woman. Thanks for the article.

NYgal1542 · 02-18-2018, 08:07 PM

I don't think this is totally an old age thing.

Anyone with a handicap of any type is looked down on and treated less than. My late sister had cerebral palsy from birth and I can tell you throughout her life she was not treated like a person who had no handicap.

One time in an ER where I took her because she had slipped on ice and needed stitches, the nurse assigned to her kept speaking in a very loud voice. I looked him in the eye and told him that she was not deaf. He might as well have been deaf. Kept yelling at her.

Mr5150 · 02-18-2018, 10:53 PM

One of the nice things about living where I do (a retirement area in CA) us old farts are treated with respect. Even by high schoolers. I feel sad for folks who live in areas where respect is not the case. People with disabilities also treated well in those areas.
I’ve lived in several parts of rural CA and have always been appreciative of how people treat each other. Can’t say that is the case in LA or the Bay Area. Or in NYC where the article is based. Sad

Serious Conversation · 02-19-2018, 06:34 AM

One thing, right or wrong, is that for someone disabled, we often presume they have a "caregiver" and are not making the decisions for themselves.

katharsis · 02-19-2018, 08:58 AM

I work with the public, and if I see someone with some kind of disability, I will approach him or her, and smile and greet them the same as I would anyone else. It is only if the person does not respond to me in any way, that I will then treat the person as somewhat "invisible" -- again, the same as I would anyone else.

(I grew up with a severely disabled brother, so perhaps that explains why I am not inclined to act differently, discourteously or disrespectfully to someone just because s/he has an obvious disability.)