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Old 02-21-2018, 10:21 PM
 
Location: Boca Raton, FL
6,882 posts, read 11,203,051 times
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Lately, I've been having flashbacks or remembering things vividly that I have not thought about for 45-50 years.

One of the flashbacks was a trip I took which I had remembered I took a trip but the details come to me about once or twice a month; kind of like in a dream. I will wake up and it's like I was living it again; it's so real but I can't remember the next part.

Some of this stuff is not that important but I'm trying to remember who I was before I worked all the time.

It's too late now obviously but trying to figure out why I made some of the decisions I made (therefore, the regret).

One time I dreamed I was in a car going down the wrong side of the road with a guy (became abusive in the relationship at certain points) but I remember waking up really afraid and scared and then I remembered the event. It came back to me quickly but that was obviously the right choice to leave that relationship.
(I planned well though but I think I took the trip to get away from this guy....)

Do you have more dreams as you get older? Daydreams?

I remember I used to daydream in French class b/c there was this really cute guy sitting right in front of me. He ended up being a great friend but I was the one who heard the stories of all the other girls. Ahhh.....
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Old 02-22-2018, 12:15 AM
 
Location: SW Florida
5,586 posts, read 8,368,458 times
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I have lived a life in which I have many regrets. I wish I had a do-over from the 60's through the 80's. And unfortunately, in the past few years I've been getting flashbacks to things that I regret, things I'm ashamed of, and I have to will myself to think of something else that is happy or at least not so upsetting. I don't know how to get rid of these dark memories...maybe I should go to a therapist.
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Old 02-22-2018, 06:17 AM
 
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I have many regrets from the past, however...

I would not change a thing, if I did things may have turned out differently and I would not have my Children and Grandchildren who are my world.
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Old 02-22-2018, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Planet Woof
3,222 posts, read 4,554,098 times
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I think most people ponder these things, especially later in life. But my philosophy is to not dwell on that stuff and let it get you down. For every bad decision we made there was also a good one . I believe that all things happen for a reason and each step, good or bad, has led to the blessings I experience today. We can't change our past. We can change how we experience our present and I don't intend on wasting any of it by focusing on the "should have" and " if only" stuff. Like my CD name says, I live each day like a dog, focused on the present moment. This approach to life has brought me inner peace and contentment.
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Old 02-22-2018, 06:57 PM
 
Location: Western Colorado
12,858 posts, read 16,807,579 times
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That's happened to me, sometimes I'll just flash to 20 or 30 years ago or more. A few weeks ago I was sitting watching tv and there I was pitching in Little League for the state championship just like it was today. The crowd, the banners, the warm June weather. I could almost smell the fresh cut grass and popcorn.

When those happen I just say to myself "huh". And go on.
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Old 02-22-2018, 08:59 PM
 
Location: Boca Raton, FL
6,882 posts, read 11,203,051 times
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Smile Exactly!

I was wondering b/c sometimes you see people just sitting and are they daydreaming? Thinking of the past like this where sometimes just pops in and you seriously have not thought about it for 30 years?

I took a trip when I was 19 or 20 all by myself, stayed with some people, different ones and I had forgotten all about all this. Every month or so I get a new detail and it is like it just happened. I think I was trying to make a major decision and that's why I went on the trip.

Some of these things I've not thought about forever.
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Old 02-22-2018, 10:04 PM
 
Location: Sierra Nevada Land, CA
9,455 posts, read 12,494,644 times
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Counseling might be a good idea.
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Old 02-23-2018, 01:30 AM
 
Location: Cebu, Philippines
5,869 posts, read 4,178,846 times
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Well, just to keep the opinions balanced, I'd say counseling would be a terrible idea.

First of all, it would cost thousands of dollars. There is absolutely no evidence in the post that there is any kind of psychological stress, only that the poster has noticed some age-related changes in his dream and memory patterns. So do I. I notice them and I'm curious about them, but it certainly not something that impacts my life so drastically that I need to make weekly drives to therapists and drug myself.

Everybody in advanced years begins to lose memory acuity. Maybe this is simply a compensating process of the memory rummaging around trying to defrag your teetering memory, plugging holes.

It's like hair growing in your ears -- you don't run to a doctor to ask what's wrong.. It's an aging process, get used to it.
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Old 02-23-2018, 04:34 PM
 
8,238 posts, read 6,549,470 times
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I experience this, OP. I do not believe that 'everything happens for a reason' though. Why would it?
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Old 02-23-2018, 05:30 PM
 
1,322 posts, read 1,679,933 times
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Bette,

I think you fill find this of interest:

It is one of Oliver Sacks' essays on Memory and it begins: "In 1993, approaching my sixtieth birthday, I started to experience a curious phenomenon—the spontaneous, unsolicited rising of early memories into my mind, memories which had lain dormant for upwards of fifty years."

https://www.threepennyreview.com/samples/sacks_w05.html
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