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Old 03-07-2018, 09:00 AM
 
1,815 posts, read 1,138,989 times
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To avoid the rifraf.
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Old 03-07-2018, 09:25 AM
 
1,191 posts, read 665,070 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marcandme View Post
If the OP has to ask....then he/she really wouldn`t understand. My rings will always be part of me. I buried my mother with her wedding ring on
We did the same. I don't think my mother ever took her wedding band off for the 60+ years she was married so we did not remove it for burial. However, she did want her diamond ring passed on so we followed those instructions.

Personally I would never remove my rings after being married for 40 + years. I have zero interest in getting married again as I know how very fortunate I was to be in a happy marriage. Almost all of my divorced or widowed friends in their 60s will not even consider remarriage - too fraught with financial and other entanglements that they do not want themselves or their families involved with. They travel with friends or family and lead full lives. Every widow of that age I know wears her wedding rings. Just a personal choice.
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Old 03-07-2018, 11:36 AM
 
Location: NYC
12,935 posts, read 8,761,364 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by V8 Vega View Post
I think they don't want people to know they are single, their not interested in any dating. Or they like the rings and just left them on. Or they can't get the ring off and just left it on.
There was a many pages thread here awhile ago, I forgot the title, where the great majority of widowed retired women don't want to remarry.
Women wear rings, even single women often wear rings on any finger regardless of their status. I think it's shallow to judge people simply by the jewelry they wear.
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Old 03-07-2018, 11:49 AM
 
Location: Living near our Nation's Capitol since 2010
2,177 posts, read 2,917,307 times
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I was surprised when I saw this topic. I cannot imagine why anyone would question a widow/widower who keep wearing their wedding rings. If they want to remove them, fine, but seems to me there should never be that expectation.

When my Dad died, my Mom never gave a thought to removing her wedding ring. She had worn it for over 50 years, they had such a wonderful marriage. She died with that ring on, and she was buried with it still on her finger. We just couldn't take it off her. It was a good decision for us.

I wonder if people think that widows should give up their married names once their spouse dies...I mean, what's the difference? Seems to me someone who questions the rings might think the widow is no longer "entitled" to the married last name! Crazy!
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Old 03-07-2018, 11:55 AM
 
1,327 posts, read 650,208 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SFBayBoomer View Post
I got the impression that the OP was either male or younger (or both). Like you said, we don't know.
OP is indeed a single male....it is on his profile
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Old 03-07-2018, 12:28 PM
 
Location: Grove City, Ohio
10,135 posts, read 12,392,750 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LookingatFL View Post
V8 Vega,

Grief is both an emotion and a process. A wife doesn't just stop loving her husband just because he died. The process of grief is about finding a way to continue the bond. It is not about finding a way to forget or "move on". Acceptance does not mean forgetting.

Spuggy is correct. The wedding ring is a symbol of their love and is very difficult emotionally to remove. In point of fact, unless you are marrying someone else, there really is no reason to HAVE to remove the ring.
I think I have women figured out.

Maybe.

Perhaps.

But they are the strong sex and contrary to what many might think men need their wives far more than they need us men.

If the love of my life lost me she would continue on and I doubt very much should would be interested in dating or whatever. She'd be strong and continue on with her friends.

On the other hand I would be straight out pathetic like a lost puppy going without food for three days straight. I would really miss the companionship of someone that actually knows me better than I know myself. What would I do? Pathetic to think about.
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Old 03-07-2018, 12:35 PM
 
Location: Edina, MN, USA
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nicet4


Aw - a guy that actually admits it


Cute post
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Old 03-07-2018, 12:42 PM
 
4,484 posts, read 4,746,514 times
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Is it really that important to you?
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Old 03-07-2018, 02:20 PM
 
Location: Eastern Washington
14,247 posts, read 44,937,745 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dothetwist View Post
I know a woman whose husband died 15 years ago and she has kept his recording on their home answering machine. Oddly they had a tumultuous marriage and had been separated for 6 months in the year he died, though were living together at the time of his death.
That may be for physical security as much as for sentimental reasons. A woman living alone probably would be best advised not to broadcast that fact to strangers.

As to keeping the rings on - probably as many reasons as there are women out there doing this. Although. If I were single again, my eyesight is quite good for a 60 year old man, if I see what looks like a wedding set on the left hand, the half-second or so it takes me to recognize that, is the limit of time I will spend "checking out" that particular lady. I doubt this is just me, probably most guys will do similar. Just sayin'.
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Old 03-07-2018, 03:50 PM
 
4,446 posts, read 2,618,160 times
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It took 5 years for my FATHER to take off his ring after mom passed.

He said he couldn't bear to part with it just yet.

Took him 8 years to divest himself of moms extra clothes hanging in the basement. He finally took them to salvation army thrift shop. Earlier than that I asked him when he was going to get rid of them when we cleaning out the basement. He said he couldn't do that just yet. Had he been ready I would have suggested he take them and sell them to a "vintage clothing" store, he might habe gotten some good money. But he never told me when he parted with them, so I never got to suggest that. He still has her clothes in her side of the large master bedroom closet, though.

It all comes down to when one us through that part of grieving to let things go.

Each has tgeir own process and if it takes the rest of their lives, so be it.

Besides unless you want to date her, or him, just exactly how does it matter to you s/he is still wear ing their wedding ring??????
I mean, exactly how does it affect you?
What business is it of yours?
Why do you care?

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