Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
whew, I guess my definition of a close friend is way different than others.
So these are my 3 girlfriends, we have been friends for over 35 years. we are at disney celebrating one of them becoming breast cancer free.
So let me get this straight, this person is a close friend and you're stressing about giving her some money to help her from medical bills.
Sorry that in my book is not a friend. Let me tell you what my friend did when my husband died. Covered my mortgage because I was too out of it to get out of bed AND got in touch with the University of Cincinnati where my son was attending and made sure his tutiton was paid.
Never said a word, never asked to be paid back. the only reason why I even found out was because after 3 months I finally called the bank and they were confused because they said the mortgage was current. My mortgage was 1800 a month at the time.
sorry if you are afraid to lend/give someone a financial help then they are not your "close" friend.
just my opinion.
If you don't mind saying, which one is you?
Yeah, you all 3 look good and like you are having a good time. Getting out from under the "Big C" is a great stress reducer.
Yeah, you all 3 look good and like you are having a good time. Getting out from under the "Big C" is a great stress reducer.
lol unfortunately I'm the one taking the picture. this was a few weeks ago after almost a 3 year fight. 2 years on and off of treatment and this was the first anniversary.
We have been friends for 36 years since we met at the dorms at the University of Pittsburgh. I was an absolute basket case after my wonderful hubby died suddenly and they went so above and beyond.
I just think nowadays we call each other "best friends", "close friends" etc and etc so quickly and then when the going gets tough......
I'm not rich but I know how quickly hospital bills can ring up and lord don't have a family that you still have to take care of.
even if I didn't have it in cash, I would have slapped it on a credit card just to relieve some of the tension.
We call ourselves the "golden Girls".
So let me apologize if I sounded holier than thou. I think I may have been just surprised.
Op, I would simply pay the bill (if you can) no strings, no work requirements. If she said no don't worry about it. let it go. or ask if there is any thing else she needs taken care of.
For me, and this is just me money would never stand in the way of me helping my truly close friends.
Last edited by eliza61nyc; 04-19-2018 at 04:45 PM..
whew, I guess my definition of a close friend is way different than others.
So these are my 3 girlfriends, we have been friends for over 35 years. we are at disney celebrating one of them becoming breast cancer free.
So let me get this straight, this person is a close friend and you're stressing about giving her some money to help her from medical bills.
Sorry that in my book is not a friend. Let me tell you what my friend did when my husband died. Covered my mortgage because I was too out of it to get out of bed AND got in touch with the University of Cincinnati where my son was attending and made sure his tutiton was paid.
Never said a word, never asked to be paid back. the only reason why I even found out was because after 3 months I finally called the bank and they were confused because they said the mortgage was current. My mortgage was 1800 a month at the time.
sorry if you are afraid to lend/give someone a financial help then they are not your "close" friend.
just my opinion.
Yes, I agree, this is a friend forever. I am more than glad that she had the funds to take care of you in your time of need since you did not have a Power of Attorney for Finances. Lord, girl you hit the lucky on that one.
She had the money and she cared enough about you to do what a friend would do. She really is something. With a hell of a lot of money to help you. You got the friend lottery.
Did you pay it back? Not monthly. Or did she just say...I love you and it is a gift. Then you won the double lottery.
Do you have the cash to do the same and would you?
Yes, I agree, this is a friend forever
She had the money and she cared enough about you to do what a friend would do. She really is something. With a hell of a lot of money to help you. You got the friend lottery.
Did you pay it back? Not monthly. Or did she just say...I love you and it is a gift. Then you won the double lottery.
Do you have the cash to do the same and would you?
So let me start out with Im on the downhill slide to 60. So i have 4 bffs. The 3 in the picture and one who i met in the 1st grade. That's 50 years. That's longer than a lot of folks marriages.
Lol yes I paid her back. Actually once i got out of bed and got my head back into the game, it really was just a matter of taking the money out of my savings. One of the girls in the picture lost her daughter in a drowning accident, again we rallied the troops, made sure the day to day necessities are taken care of. Made sure the bills were paid.
I keep 7 months emergency fund liquid so if one of the 4 need 5k. They'd get it.
Again remember these are women I know intimately. My kids call them Aunt, they know my finances, one was my health care proxy.
These are my "ride or die" friends, meaning the only reason for us not to standby each other is because were dead.
We've supported each other thru marriages, divorces, cancer, knee replacements, losing children, losing parents, kids, kids driving us insane, job lost and now we're going into hot flashes together
So let me start out with Im on the downhill slide to 60. So i have 4 bffs. The 3 in the picture and one who i met in the 1st grade. That's 50 years. That's longer than a lot of folks marriages.
Lol yes I paid her back. Actually once i got out of bed and got my head back into the game, it really was just a matter of taking the money out of my savings. One of the girls in the picture lost her daughter in a drowning accident, again we rallied the troops, made sure the day to day necessities are taken care of. Made sure the bills were paid.
I keep 7 months emergency fund liquid so if one of the 4 need 5k. They'd get it.
Again remember these are women I know intimately. My kids call them Aunt, they know my finances, one was my health care proxy.
These are my "ride or die" friends, meaning the only reason for us not to standby each other is because were dead.
And that is what people are about. A community, a clan, a tribe, a den
You are blessed. I want to see you in other persons lives.
You have a beautiful place. Give it to those that do not have that. You will find yourself a spiritual teacher whether you like it or not...love love and joy
And that is what people are about. A community, a clan, a tribe, a den
You are blessed. I want to see you in other persons lives.
You have a beautiful place. Give it to those that do not have that. You will find yourself a spiritual teacher whether you like it or not...love love and joy
Hey thanks TMK,
and listen we are by no means saints, like everyone else we have done some spectacularly dumb things with our money lol. let them tell you the story about how I blew my rent on "exotic grade" hair for a hair weave. the conversation went some thing like, "seriously E, seriously" we have to bail your *&^ out because you wanted hair down your back!!
The way you state this indicates you have only looked at it from the, "Gee, if she doesn't pay me back, I'm ok with losing the money, but don't want to loose her friendship" position.
OFTEN, when money is lent between two people you will find it is NOT the lender but the LENDEE that walk away from the relationship, especially if they find it difficult or are unwilling or unable to continue with payments...they resent you, you resent them....don't do it if your relationship with this person is really that important to you...it is a 2 way street.
It has been my experience that seldom can people repay loans. Even if they truly want to they just can't.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
