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I simply would not date anyone who is so shallow that they rate people's looks on a numerical scale.
And how did you feel about the food reference? Just kidding...
It's just shorthand really. We know a 9-10 is model-like beautiful/handsome, regardless of age. And of course, everything else is going downhill from there. It's not something most people would say out loud, but I think most people do make judgments about others' appearance, and whether you call someone a "7" or "pretty cute, not beautiful" is just a matter of terminology. As I mentioned earlier in the thread, I've always had bad luck with the men I found to be 8-10 on an appearance scale, so I'm far more interested in a man's sense of humor, intelligence, stability, kindness, and looks are not that important.
You know if you see a trophy with a much less attractive man/woman, especially one much older, that it's probably not based upon mutual physical attraction.
Last edited by TheShadow; 07-18-2018 at 08:35 AM..
And how did you feel about the food reference? Just kidding...
It's just shorthand really. We know a 9-10 is model-like beautiful/handsome, regardless of age. And of course, everything else is going downhill from there. It's not something most people would say out loud, but I think most people do make judgments about others' appearance, and whether you call someone a "7" or "pretty cute, not beautiful" is just a matter of terminology. As I mentioned earlier in the thread, I've always had bad luck with the men I found to be 8-10 on an appearance scale, so I'm far more interested in a man's sense of humor, intelligence, stability, kindness, and looks are not that important.
You know if you see a trophy with a much less attractive man/woman, especially one much older, that it's probably not based upon mutual physical attraction.
Are you a heterosexual male? Just wondering, because I have never heard anyone else use the 1-10 scale.
I really am a believer in the saying "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". There is a no "one size fits all" or "people have to stay in their own lane" mentality.
The men I have dated over the decades have been all over the spectrum....looks, race, age, weight, fitness, height, etc. However there was always something that I really found attractive in them. It could be the way their eyes twinkled when they smiled, their beautiful hands, their voice, how articulate they were, their brain, how they treated animals....so many different things and it varied from person to person I dated. Likewise, I doubt it was the same thing about me that drew each of these men to me. And really what made me stay, and I assume made the men stay with me, had nothing to do with how we looked on the outside.
Have you never seen the movie "10" with Bo Derek and Dudley Moore? Maybe it was just a 70's thing, but it's been fairly common, especially in movies and TV. And, no, I would never give someone a number out loud to anyone else, except maybe whispered to my female BFF or my husband. I don't JUDGE people on their looks, but I certainly know that I can put them in rank order of attractiveness on a fairly universal scale.
edited to add: I think everyone has made the observation that, among their friends that so-and-so has a great figure, or that some guy is really hot. You didn't put numbers on them maybe, but most women know who their best looking friend is, or who's got a great looking husband.
Last edited by TheShadow; 07-18-2018 at 10:08 AM..
And how did you feel about the food reference? Just kidding...
Actually, I will confess that I laughed out loud about the filet mignon vs. pork slider phrase because I thought it was hilarious and creative, and I originally said so in my post, but then I took it out because it seemed hypocritical alongside what I said about the numerical rating.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow
It's just shorthand really. We know a 9-10 is model-like beautiful/handsome, regardless of age. And of course, everything else is going downhill from there. It's not something most people would say out loud, but I think most people do make judgments about others' appearance, and whether you call someone a "7" or "pretty cute, not beautiful" is just a matter of terminology. As I mentioned earlier in the thread, I've always had bad luck with the men I found to be 8-10 on an appearance scale, so I'm far more interested in a man's sense of humor, intelligence, stability, kindness, and looks are not that important.
You know if you see a trophy with a much less attractive man/woman, especially one much older, that it's probably not based upon mutual physical attraction.
You are correct about it being a form of shorthand. I often peruse the Relationships forum for entertainment purposes, and I see that 1 - 10 thing referenced so much, especially by younger men, that I came to find it dehumanizing.
Glad to see what you said in the second sentence I bolded. I feel exactly the same way.
There can be some truth to disparity in a couple's looks covering up something else. I have never been a pretty woman, although I did what I could to make myself presentable. My ex-husband was much higher on the "scale" than I was when it comes to looks. Even now, at 62, he has only a few strands of gray in his blond hair, which he still has all of, is 6'4", strongly built, and generally attractive and looks younger for a man his age. His internal organs probably tell a different story, but on the outside, he looks pretty good.
People probably wondered what he was doing with me 30 years ago. Well, I have the answer. I had a good steady job, took care of all the problems that came up, and bailed him out of the messes he got himself into with his drinking, drug, and gambling habits. A good-looking woman who had more choices probably never would have put up with that crap to begin with, but I was a slow learner.
We homely girls wanted to be married just as the pretty girls knew they could without effort, but to get there we often closed our eyes to less-than-optimum circumstances.
Last edited by Mightyqueen801; 07-18-2018 at 10:12 AM..
Reason: Missing end quote tag
At any rate, I find my current bf attractive yea though we are now of this age, plus even better, he's a person of much higher character with far more love in his heart than the one I married. Here's to second chances. (Or third, fourth, whatever.)
I do have a friend who is on her fourth marriage and happy at last. She's 12 years into this one, so I think it's sticking!
If I were to date, three things I would like:
1. The man has to be able to afford to take me out to include an occasional vacation.
I've paid for many things in relationships now its my turn to get treated.
2. Must not have really bad teeth or I can't kiss him let alone anything else.
3. Must not be negative, mean, or need looking after.
I offer many attributes to the right person and am financially independent with my own home.
I could have dated 2 men who approached me this year but I turned em down due to being nervous about dating again.
Well, I think it's safe to say, both sexes are looking for someone who seems to care about their appearance, rather than someone who has said to themselves essentially "I'm old as dirt, I don't care how I look." You can be old and still take care of yourself and be attractive.
Being obese, yeah, that is usually a non-starter either way. And anyone can avoid being *obese*. Not everyone can be "ripped", particularly at an advanced age, but if you pay some attention to the quality and quantity of your diet, you won't be obese.
And, yeah, to me a "man cut" or a "helmet cut" on a woman, is more or less saying "I'm old as dirt, I don't care how I look." Life ain't fair - an older guy with severe hair loss can just shave his gourd, and be done with it, and that look will appeal to at least some. No equivalent move for a lady. A woman does not need *long* hair to be attractive, nor does it need to be expensively coiffed. But it needs to be styled, at least some. To me, the plain old all one length, part in the middle, or with bangs, is fine, and again that length does not have to be long, but it does need to cover your ears.
Of course life ain't fair to guys either - a chubby guy is not going to be that appealing to most. A heavier gal who is busty can get away with being quite chubby and will still get plenty of play.
Last edited by M3 Mitch; 07-18-2018 at 12:57 PM..
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