Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
In the apartment complex where I live you have to be over age 60, I think. I am well over that age so I never paid much attention, lol.
Anyway, it's mostly women. There would be more couples here except that there isn't any parking for more than one car. Any man who lives here can easily scoop up one of the women if he wants to. A year ago one guy died and his widow soon took up with one of the neighbor men. She even changed apartments to a one bedroom and so that she could live next door to this guy. They're a cute couple. She is attractive for someone her age, not overweight, not unkempt, and has a pleasant personality. He's a pretty nice guy too, always helping other people. Both are home bodies.
One other single guy here hangs out with one of the other widows and is at her apartment most of the time. I think he's at least 90--talks about his experiences in WWII. I don't know how old she is, never met her, but probably a similar age.
The other eligible man here dates someone who lives in a condo but he met her a long time ago, before he moved here. She told me he's probably in his late 80s. She's no spring chicken but is pleasant to talk to and and enjoys being on the go--just like he does. She dresses well. So does he. Met at a fitness club and they still keep fit.
I think these people are choosing their late in life mates based upon what they have in common, not upon age. EVERYONE here is above a certain age. They either value home life, value nice things and keeping fit, are involved in volunteer activities, and so on.
But on dating sites, it was about age and money with the men bragging about their money and wanting a young girl. (That's why, at age 55+ I turned my online dating radar toward the UK and got a more down to earth sweetie pie. BTW just before I found him, I found a wonderful man from Scotland who was lonely after his wife died and wanted to come over and meet me! He wanted me to come over and enjoy his beautiful Scotland with him--to marry him! I was set to meet him until he confessed that he was already 75 yrs old. I had to decline, much as I hated to hurt his feelings, but I wasn't ready to risk that age difference. He understood and was a perfect gentleman about it. But I get the impression that the UK men actually want to find a woman and not be alone for the rest of their lives, in general moreso than American men. Or maybe some of them are more isolated, living somewhere out in the middle of nowhere.
This is not to disparage American men but online at least, the nicer ones tended to not be American. Of course, you still have to beware of some who think Americans are rich and a woman can get them into the country with all our money! HA!
Actually, what I'm seeing is that the nice, normal women are the ones who get men at an older age. The loud mouthed ones-no. The pushy ones-no. The ones who have let themselves go-no. Neat and clean and ordinary-yes.
But I am a woman. I am only reporting what I have observed and it's subjective based upon couples that I have seen.
OH--I just asked my other half what he, as an older man, looked for in a woman. Right off he said, "personality." (What do you mean?) "Attitude, how you look at things, little things we say and do." So there's some more input from an older man.
Statistically, yes, there are more women at any given age than there are men of the same age. Even from birth. Except for brute strength, women really are the stronger sex. They live longer, have less sicknesses, and so on. The figure I heard is that women live about seven years longer, on average, than men. If this is true, it makes perfect sense that as seniors, there are many more women then men. Maybe it is God's way of balancing things in that senior women do just fine on their own and actually prefer it in most cases, whereas men seem to need to be with someone.
Statistically, yes, there are more women at any given age than there are men of the same age. Even from birth. Except for brute strength, women really are the stronger sex. They live longer, have less sicknesses, and so on. The figure I heard is that women live about seven years longer, on average, than men. If this is true, it makes perfect sense that as seniors, there are many more women then men. Maybe it is God's way of balancing things in that senior women do just fine on their own and actually prefer it in most cases, whereas men seem to need to be with someone.
Just to share, I have a long-time friend who is older, nice-looking, active, having lived in another state now so we don't talk often, but stay in touch. Some years ago she met a man who she couldn't really see at that time, since the man's wife was dying, but had made a connection through a similar interest.
She found out that due to his dedication to his adult children and religious beliefs, they did not spend a lot of time together, but continued seeing each other the past several years (unsure to what degree time is spent together). I recall her saying that on her birthday the beginning of the year, he took her to a lovely restaurant and gave her some nice gifts, including a large sum of cash. Then, recently said how he had bought her a bunch of new furniture and two TV's. I asked if he spends a lot of time at her place and she made it sound that he only does so for limited periods.
Now, the upshot is (which I didn't update in our recent conversation, being cut short), that she has said prior that there had been nothing physical between them, which apparently has to do with religious beliefs and not disrespecting his family. Anyway, she appears grateful for his companionship and all that he offers her and have seen each other a long while.
I am happy for her that she can have a seemingly nice and generous man around late in life, after having had a few marriages, but I suppose I just find the scenario unusual, his not requiring anything physical or even a whole lot of time together. (I don't think she knew initially that he was "well off", either). She maintains her independence and he does not seem to require much attention from her.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,712 posts, read 58,054,000 times
Reputation: 46182
Quote:
Originally Posted by In2itive_1
Just to share, I have a long-time friend who is older, nice-looking, active, having lived in another state now so we don't talk often, but stay in touch. Some years ago she met a man who she couldn't really see at that time, since the man's wife was dying, but had made a connection through a similar interest.
She found out that due to his dedication to his adult children and religious beliefs, they did not spend a lot of time together, but continued seeing each other the past several years ... nothing physical between them, which apparently has to do with religious beliefs and not disrespecting his family. Anyway, she appears grateful for his companionship and all that he offers her and have seen each other a long while.
I am happy for her that she can have a seemingly nice and generous man around late in life, after having had a few marriages, but I suppose I just find the scenario unusual, his not requiring anything physical or even a whole lot of time together. (I don't think she knew initially that he was "well off", either). She maintains her independence and he does not seem to require much attention from her.
I have known a few relationships like that, and sure wish my FIL could have resisted his Gold-digger that struck long before MIL funeral. (as does HE).
Older lessons are tough to learn.
It can be much better for both families (retained sibling / child / familial relationships) to keep 'best friends' in older life very discrete.
I'm very happy for your friend, to have such a friend!
I will surmise there is a lot of meaning to the relationship for both, which no-one else will ever understand.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,712 posts, read 58,054,000 times
Reputation: 46182
Quote:
Originally Posted by TRex2
Guess it is too bad we did away with polygamy
(Guess I should duck and run for cover, LoL! )
I hear a lot of the need for 'reverse' polygamy...
As SLOW as 'what's-his-face' is..., it gonna take 4-5 of them to get the 'Honey-do' list accomplished.
Can't afford to FEED than many 'what's-his-face's'
Oh... and the mess.../ laundry / needs...
"Guess I will just have to do it myself" (as per the last 60+ yrs)
BTW: stayed with (4) Dairy Farm couples in the last week. 70+ yrs together EACH couple! WOW, that is a LOT of 4:30 AM mornings (which nobody really enjoyed). 7 days / week. (including the wedding day, and the day AFTER the wedding! and 356 days a yr since the wedding.
There is HOPE for 'satisfaction' with each other, in spite of the warring.
Guess it is too bad we did away with polygamy
(Guess I should duck and run for cover, LoL! )
I actually met several polygamists when I lived in "Zion" for several years. There are modern & traditional types, secular or religious, but the reality of most of the "patriarchs" is that the women actually did most of the "choosing" one way or another either outright or by manipulation. The show "Big Love" on HBO a few years ago was actually pretty realistic.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had to decline, much as I hated to hurt his feelings, but I wasn't ready to risk that age difference. He understood and was a perfect gentleman about it. But I get the impression that the UK men actually want to find a woman and not be alone for the rest of their lives, in general moreso than American men. Or maybe some of them are more isolated, living somewhere out in the middle of nowhere.
