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Old 10-15-2018, 12:01 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,554 posts, read 17,535,380 times
Reputation: 27596

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Some of you may remember that I've had several threads on my grandmother over the years. She had a knee replacement at the first of the year, got over that, but is still not really mobile enough to live independently in the tri-level home she's owned since 1967.

Over the last few weeks, she's begun moving into my aunt's condo. Her day-to-day things are over at my aunt's, but here's the rub.

1) Grandma doesn't want to sell the home. For now, she has the cash to cover it. The home has not been lived in much this year. She's stayed there some over the summer, but other than that, she's mostly been at my aunt's. She's paying the upkeep on it.

2) We've discussed turning it over to a property manager as a rental. It would augment her income, but she's afraid the house will just get trashed.

The only thing she seems to WANT to do is sell it to me or some of the other family members. The "bones" are fine, but the home needs to be updated. I don't want the house. It is closer to my current office, so at most I might rent it for a few months until I can leave. I don't want to deal with having her stuff and my stuff in it. I really don't want much to do with it.

Did your parents try to get you to take over family property as they aged? Are you trying to do the same to your kids?
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Old 10-15-2018, 12:34 PM
 
Location: Ypsilanti, MI
2,434 posts, read 3,659,178 times
Reputation: 4778
Yes, my parents tried to get my wife and I to take over their home in the late 1980's. At the time it would have been a 35+ mile commute to work compared to the 7 miles I had from our home. It also sat on 3 acres of landscaped lawn which required hours per week to mow and trim (trust me, I spent most of my teenaged years mowing that lawn and the two acres associated with their rental property).


We declined the offer, repeatedly. After the deaths of both parents my older sister bought the home from their estate. Now she is trying to get me and my other sister to accept ownership of all the family knick-knacks whose history is lost (if they ever had one).


No thanks. We have enough of our own junk collected during 40 years of marriage and kids.
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Old 10-15-2018, 12:54 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
7,604 posts, read 4,680,291 times
Reputation: 27811
Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger View Post
Now she is trying to get me and my other sister to accept ownership of all the family knick-knacks whose history is lost (if they ever had one).

Oh, I love that.

She doesn't want them around but she invokes "family" so they'll be stored in somebody else's house.

I'd offer to rent a dumpster.
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Old 10-15-2018, 01:46 PM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
28,487 posts, read 62,101,894 times
Reputation: 32148
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
Did your parents try to get you to take over family property as they aged?
I thought that was your plan/expectation all along ...
at least at some point. And why I was surprised that you bought that condo.
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Old 10-15-2018, 01:54 PM
 
Location: Eastern Washington
14,217 posts, read 44,878,144 times
Reputation: 12792
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
Some of you may remember that I've had several threads on my grandmother over the years. She had a knee replacement at the first of the year, got over that, but is still not really mobile enough to live independently in the tri-level home she's owned since 1967.

Over the last few weeks, she's begun moving into my aunt's condo. Her day-to-day things are over at my aunt's, but here's the rub.

1) Grandma doesn't want to sell the home. For now, she has the cash to cover it. The home has not been lived in much this year. She's stayed there some over the summer, but other than that, she's mostly been at my aunt's. She's paying the upkeep on it.

2) We've discussed turning it over to a property manager as a rental. It would augment her income, but she's afraid the house will just get trashed.

The only thing she seems to WANT to do is sell it to me or some of the other family members. The "bones" are fine, but the home needs to be updated. I don't want the house. It is closer to my current office, so at most I might rent it for a few months until I can leave. I don't want to deal with having her stuff and my stuff in it. I really don't want much to do with it.

Did your parents try to get you to take over family property as they aged? Are you trying to do the same to your kids?

I call BS. You are watching too much HGTV. Old fixtures that are period to the original build are fine.



If it is not your kind of house and you don't want it, OK fine. I think the main point is that you don't like the location where the house is, and you struggle to get a decent job around there.
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Old 10-15-2018, 02:01 PM
 
6,306 posts, read 5,046,206 times
Reputation: 12805
Heck no - they wanted us to do our own thing. If I had kids, I wouldn't do that to them either.

You see that a lot around here. Its not exactly a rich town, so I guess they feel if all they have is a semi-ok house, they gotta do all they can to hang on to it. Then it just sits there and falls apart

Thankfully they finally tore down the main eyesore on our main street. Grandkids whining about granpa's house, yet none worked enough to keep it up. Ridiculous.
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Old 10-15-2018, 02:04 PM
 
6,213 posts, read 4,718,283 times
Reputation: 12710
No. Sold it after parents deaths.
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Old 10-15-2018, 02:07 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,554 posts, read 17,535,380 times
Reputation: 27596
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Mitch View Post
I call BS. You are watching too much HGTV. Old fixtures that are period to the original build are fine.

If it is not your kind of house and you don't want it, OK fine. I think the main point is that you don't like the location where the house is, and you struggle to get a decent job around there.
Would it sell? Sure, at the right price. I'd expect it to get the $120k-$130k range. County schools are not very good. I don't much care for the location and job stability is always going to be a concern around here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrRational View Post
I thought that was your plan/expectation all along ...
at least at some point. And why I was surprised that you bought that condo.
I never wanted this property.
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Old 10-15-2018, 02:41 PM
 
3,247 posts, read 844,077 times
Reputation: 3763
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
Some of you may remember that I've had several threads on my grandmother over the years. She had a knee replacement at the first of the year, got over that, but is still not really mobile enough to live independently in the tri-level home she's owned since 1967.

Over the last few weeks, she's begun moving into my aunt's condo. Her day-to-day things are over at my aunt's, but here's the rub.

1) Grandma doesn't want to sell the home. For now, she has the cash to cover it. The home has not been lived in much this year. She's stayed there some over the summer, but other than that, she's mostly been at my aunt's. She's paying the upkeep on it.

2) We've discussed turning it over to a property manager as a rental. It would augment her income, but she's afraid the house will just get trashed.

The only thing she seems to WANT to do is sell it to me or some of the other family members. The "bones" are fine, but the home needs to be updated. I don't want the house. It is closer to my current office, so at most I might rent it for a few months until I can leave. I don't want to deal with having her stuff and my stuff in it. I really don't want much to do with it.

Did your parents try to get you to take over family property as they aged? Are you trying to do the same to your kids?
Dealt with this just recently. The "family home" is not worth keeping unless it's either a.) already paid for and being given to you, or b.) some spectacular piece of property.

If this is just some tract house that you don't have a purpose of owning or using, let it go. She can't force your hand in buying it.

That simple.
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Old 10-15-2018, 02:43 PM
 
7,895 posts, read 5,028,121 times
Reputation: 13538
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Mitch View Post
I call BS. You are watching too much HGTV. Old fixtures that are period to the original build are fine.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
Would it sell? Sure, at the right price. I'd expect it to get the $120k-$130k range. County schools are not very good. I don't much care for the location and job stability is always going to be a concern around here.
Precisely because the location is stagnant, there's no business-case for making "updates". Their cost won't be recouped, let alone generate a net profit.

There's much to be said for inheriting property, even if it's in an undesirable neighborhood, or the styling doesn't comport with one's own tastes. If the current owner refuses to sell, there's not much to be done, other than gentle (if persistent) cajoling. Otherwise, best would be to sell the place as-is, no warranty, at whatever price the market could bear... and then fight over how to divide the cash.
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