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Old 10-17-2018, 06:14 PM
mlb mlb started this thread
 
Location: North Monterey County
3,197 posts, read 2,863,927 times
Reputation: 4897

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Sadly, I couldn't do that - I had "disappeared" because of the ankle fracture.... and I work in a city of 500 employees many of them I - at least a couple hundred - I see on a daily basis.

Of course they all wondered where I am.... and today I got a call from one of them - my counterpart in the Police Department.

They understand I don't want a party - I don't expect everyone to care.....

We'll put out the word and those who are interested will come and raise a glass after work.
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Old 10-17-2018, 08:25 PM
 
Location: S.W. Florida
2,223 posts, read 938,342 times
Reputation: 6263
Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
I have just one more day (yay!) until I am officially retired. I have been "de-facto" retired - as I broke my ankle 6 weeks ago and went on FMLA.

I've hobbled (with a skooter) into work to get a flu shot (work clinic) and to sign final paperwork.... and ran into upper bosses who threatened (they were laughing at the time) to withhold my last paycheck as I told my bosses I DID NOT want a retirement party/gathering for the entire city.

Really it is my choice. I've been to a few and they are like funerals.... mormon funerals (and I am not mormon)... with punch and cookies. NOPE. I told my coworkers I'd rather meet them at a local watering hole (alcohol please) and raise a glass.... when I could actually walk... sometime down the road in the next month or so.

But my immediate coworkers are still not happy with that and want to meet for lunch. GAH. They were pissed I spent the last 6 weeks at home and not enjoying their company (kidding).

What were your choices and how did you handle it?
My choice was a lunch time party in my honor or nothing. I chose nothing because I couldn’t stand to deal with the obligatory, hypocritical well wishes from people who you know would never give you the time of day otherwise. I made the right decision.
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Old 10-18-2018, 05:57 AM
 
Location: Central New Jersey
2,422 posts, read 921,818 times
Reputation: 4285
The day on my last tour I told nobody as I didnt want no preferential treatment or parties. I went out in my terms. Many of the officers wanted to throw a party but I declined. I did accept my gold watch for my 25 years of service though.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:13 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
5,806 posts, read 4,854,199 times
Reputation: 19517
I told them I didn't want a party, but ended up having two. One of which was for "everyone", cake and flowers, and having to endure a few speeches. oof! Just what I didn't want. And then my supervisor had an off-site lunch for just our work group of 10 people. It was much more casual and I got a free lunch.

I would like to have flyonpa's company policy...I was there 24 years and I think I could have a heck of a party with $2400!
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:31 AM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
56,211 posts, read 54,662,203 times
Reputation: 66697
Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
I have just one more day (yay!) until I am officially retired. I have been "de-facto" retired - as I broke my ankle 6 weeks ago and went on FMLA.

I've hobbled (with a skooter) into work to get a flu shot (work clinic) and to sign final paperwork.... and ran into upper bosses who threatened (they were laughing at the time) to withhold my last paycheck as I told my bosses I DID NOT want a retirement party/gathering for the entire city.

Really it is my choice. I've been to a few and they are like funerals.... mormon funerals (and I am not mormon)... with punch and cookies. NOPE. I told my coworkers I'd rather meet them at a local watering hole (alcohol please) and raise a glass.... when I could actually walk... sometime down the road in the next month or so.

But my immediate coworkers are still not happy with that and want to meet for lunch. GAH. They were pissed I spent the last 6 weeks at home and not enjoying their company (kidding).

What were your choices and how did you handle it?
I retired the same month as a long-time work friend. Neither of us wanted the formal retirement party with the speeches and the big dinner. We both just wanted to have a couple of drinks with friends, so we talked about doing our exit celebration together by just having people meet us at a bar.

Our coworkers in our respective departments still wanted to do something for us, so we compromised. He and I found a pub nearby that was easy for everyone to get to and get home from by public transportation (this was in NYC) that had deal on two hours of drinks and appetizers and gave us the use of a back room since it was a weeknight and not a lot was going on. We let our coworkers make up a flyer so people could respond so they knew how many to expect, and that was our party, just everyone milling around having drinks and bites to eat and talking and laughing. One of his coworkers brought some music. No formal sit-down thing, no speeches except that we both took a moment to thank everyone at the end. It was a good way to say goodbye without much fuss, and everybody seemed to have fun.

I have seen retirement announcements for other people that just said, "Meet at 5 on <date> at <place> to have a drink with Bob and wish him well." People just show up.

About two weeks later, a good friend who I had met at work many years earlier but who didn't work there anymore said she was making Cuban food and did I want to come over for dinner. When I got to her house, it turned out to be a surprise retirement party with a bunch of people I had worked with years earlier at the original World Trade Center, most of whom were also retired or had otherwise left. It was a great time, catching up and reminiscing about our days in a place that no longer exists. We'd gone through our lives together, marriages, kids, divorces, deaths, and terrorist attacks.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:41 AM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
56,211 posts, read 54,662,203 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by turkeydance View Post
"....went on PTO to use it up and never came back."
my neighbor did that exact same thing.
he "retired" on September 7th and spent
all his PTO/vacation/etc. until the 28th
when it was finally official.
I worked for a public agency that is in the state retirement system, so you make your retirement arrangements with the state and let HR know so they can process your health benefits. Of course you are SUPPOSED to let your supervisor know, but I knew of one case where the guy so hated his boss that one day his wife called the boss and said, "Bob has retired. His ID and phone are in the top drawer of his desk." Click.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:13 AM
 
18,458 posts, read 20,222,216 times
Reputation: 27023
Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
I have just one more day (yay!) until I am officially retired. I have been "de-facto" retired - as I broke my ankle 6 weeks ago and went on FMLA.

I've hobbled (with a skooter) into work to get a flu shot (work clinic) and to sign final paperwork.... and ran into upper bosses who threatened (they were laughing at the time) to withhold my last paycheck as I told my bosses I DID NOT want a retirement party/gathering for the entire city.

Really it is my choice. I've been to a few and they are like funerals.... mormon funerals (and I am not mormon)... with punch and cookies. NOPE. I told my coworkers I'd rather meet them at a local watering hole (alcohol please) and raise a glass.... when I could actually walk... sometime down the road in the next month or so.

But my immediate coworkers are still not happy with that and want to meet for lunch. GAH. They were pissed I spent the last 6 weeks at home and not enjoying their company (kidding).

What were your choices and how did you handle it?
Just do it. You’ll most likely have minimal to no contact with these people once you retire. And if you do and need to work later or know someone who needs a favor and these people can help don’t burn bridges. Sure retirement parties are sort of dumb. It’s a few hours out of your life
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:04 AM
 
506 posts, read 261,845 times
Reputation: 816
I'm fine with what everyone wants to do. I understand why people have them.


I won't have one. I have severe anxiety when it comes to public displays like retirement parties, holiday parties, get-togethers, etc. When it comes to work it gets worse. I don't want awards, pats on the back, Atta boys, or any sort of recognition in front of anyone...ever. At my current job they have to ambush me to give me a certificate or coin or attention like that. It's my fault for not letting anyone know how I truly feel, but it's almost crippling. I don't want to talk in front of co workers about myself or recount any stories either.


I'll leave as I arrived. Anonymously, quietly and without fanfare.
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Old 10-18-2018, 11:52 AM
 
530 posts, read 539,042 times
Reputation: 959
Where I’d been a contractor-employee for seven (7) years, management was planning a large set of “conferences”, during the last week I’d announced I would retire. Those meetings always included a catered lunch.
My boss decided that one of those lunches would be my “retirement lunch”, withholding notifying me until the day before he planned it. And, like many of y’all, I had to stand around while people came by and offered their congratulations & condolences , all-the-while filling up their plates with catered food.
I was pretty embarrassed, to say the least; many of those people I never had any interaction with.
On my last day, my boss wasn’t even in the office, so I simply put my security badges and keys in a large, inter-office envelope, and left them with one of the more-senior employees, whom I could trust to turn them in, the following week.
Once I was out the doors, I never looked back.
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Old 10-18-2018, 02:46 PM
Q44
 
Location: Hudson Valley, NY
895 posts, read 767,307 times
Reputation: 1761
With retirement at year's end almost a done deal, somebody asked me if there's going to be a retirement party. I said probably yes, but you would think after 30 years of working with me, most people should realize I'm more than likely not going to show up.
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