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Old 11-06-2018, 08:30 AM
 
823 posts, read 215,906 times
Reputation: 1370

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Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
I used to do that kind of stuff for people, I figured I was just being helpful and they would be helpful if I needed something. LOL.
I prefer to be selective in how I use my time . . . making meals, going to charity events, visiting a neighbor with cancer. I do these things without expectation of any reciprocation.
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Old 11-06-2018, 08:41 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque NM
1,661 posts, read 1,527,824 times
Reputation: 3650
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
I used to do that kind of stuff for people, I figured I was just being helpful and they would be helpful if I needed something. LOL.
I'd like to find a neighbor who needed some help where they would reciprocate if I needed something. Especially rides from medical procedures or dropping and picking up my car from the shop. But all my neighbors are married and I don't like to ask them for favors. Guess I can use Uber for the car stuff if I can ever get that damn app to work. But some doctor offices don't allow you to call cabs for medical procedures and my PCP does not know of any medical services that provide this. Am due for a colonoscopy and I know eye treatments are in my future.
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Old 11-06-2018, 08:51 AM
 
823 posts, read 215,906 times
Reputation: 1370
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABQ2015 View Post
I'd like to find a neighbor who needed some help where they would reciprocate if I needed something. Especially rides from medical procedures or dropping and picking up my car from the shop. But all my neighbors are married and I don't like to ask them for favors. Guess I can use Uber for the car stuff if I can ever get that damn app to work. But some doctor offices don't allow you to call cabs for medical procedures and my PCP does not know of any medical services that provide this. Am due for a colonoscopy and I know eye treatments are in my future.
If you are a senior, some communities provide shuttles for such things.
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Old 11-06-2018, 09:11 AM
 
Location: Paranoid State
13,047 posts, read 10,448,897 times
Reputation: 15683
Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger View Post
For example, late Saturday afternoon she received a call from her youngest brother asking if there were any Halloween activities that evening for his toddler daughter in the city where they live - TWO HOURS AWAY FROM US!
The appropriate answer would have been, "I give up. Are there?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger View Post
I keep telling her to not answer her cell phone when they call, but with her mother having just turned 80 and in poor health there is an always present fear any call may be about her Mom's passing or another hospitalization.
It is A-OK to answer the phone, and in reply to a request or an inquiry, just respond "No." "No" is a complete sentence and it requires no explanation whatsoever. If, in response to a firm "No" a sibling asks "Why?" the correct answer is "Why do you ask 'Why'" ?
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Old 11-06-2018, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Paranoid State
13,047 posts, read 10,448,897 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrRational View Post
Move. Don't leave a forwarding address.
Happiness consists of a close knit family that lives in another state.
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Old 11-06-2018, 05:07 PM
 
12,126 posts, read 6,700,157 times
Reputation: 12977
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maddie104 View Post
I prefer to be selective in how I use my time . . . making meals, going to charity events, visiting a neighbor with cancer. I do these things without expectation of any reciprocation.
Yes to the volunteer type stuff, but this is about relationships like family and close friends and the unfairness when one person is always the scapegoat or doormat.
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Old 11-06-2018, 06:02 PM
 
Location: So Ca
15,793 posts, read 15,027,744 times
Reputation: 13707
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyLackland View Post
There was a certain girl who would call her brother-in-law to ask him questions about things. He would answer her questions and she would thank him and the phone call would end. This went on for some time (years). After weeks of not getting regular calls from the sister-in-law, the BIL commented to his wife on this, wondering why the change of events. His wife listened, and on her own, looked into it later. She found that her sister heard of her beloved BIL's complaints of always having to "hold his SIL's hand".
...maybe.....
That's very poignant.
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