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Old 11-07-2018, 12:18 PM
 
Location: Ypsilanti, MI
2,439 posts, read 3,661,951 times
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Glad to know I am not the only one.


Why I'm terrified to retire even though I can


Pretty much sums up my feelings of uncertainty regarding retirement. All our retired friends say we will love being retired. Maybe so, but as a kid lots of friends standing in the freezing cold water of an under heated public swimming pool would say "Jump on in. The water's fine." then I would discover it wasn't..........
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Old 11-07-2018, 12:35 PM
 
Location: Philadelphia/South Jersey area
2,871 posts, read 1,402,350 times
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I think that is pretty normal at some point. For me it was losing quite a few loved ones at a very young age that made me realize that life is ridiculously short and if I don't have to spend quality time working than Im not.

Lost my wonderful husband to cancer age 54 (2013)
Lost my little brother to cancer age 50 (2014)
Lost my best friend of 48 years to a heart attack with no underlying reasons. (2015).

Seriously by 2016 I was majorly thinking there was a curse on my life. All three, did the right things . lived below their means, saved etc etc and what did it get them in the long run?

So although I share some of the fears the author has, I'm going to be that kid that jumps into the freezing cold water.

and the author is correct, it does depend on your job. while I "like" my job there are aspects that I don't like, the 45 minute commute is one and while it's nice work, I would not call it "fulfilling". lastly it just might be after 33 years of being on someone else schedule I want to be on my own.


like my man Dr. Seuss says...

"If you never did, you should... these things are fun and fun is good"
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Old 11-07-2018, 12:37 PM
 
8,834 posts, read 5,126,299 times
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Gosh, not me. I think about it longingly every single day.

But, if you want to keep working, then keep working. It's your life; you should choose whatever appeals to you.
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Old 11-07-2018, 12:49 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
7,628 posts, read 4,693,202 times
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I read that article but noticed one glaring omission:



Nowhere does she mention when her husband plans to retire. It's like she hasn't even discussed this with him.


Is HE going to be happy in retirement while she's still busily reassuring herself that what she does matters?
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Old 11-07-2018, 01:12 PM
 
2,229 posts, read 1,099,758 times
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I would be more terrified of dying on the job.



Look at it this way, if retirement doesn't work out, you can always go back to work.
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Old 11-07-2018, 02:05 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,627 posts, read 19,955,234 times
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Yeah, it all depends on what your priorities are, there is no right and wrong answer. Though, I would caution on taking a course of action out of fear, that's not a good reason in and of itself.

Like Elyza I lost my first husband at 43, we lived below our means, we saved for retirement... and he got nothing.

At age 39 I was diagnosed with a nice slow killing disease that would have sucked all the money out of savings and retirement, and that fact strongly influenced what I decided on as a course of action (ended up not having the disease). So yeah, stuff can happen at any time.

Events like that can change your outlook on things. At 50 we are young retirees, but do not regret it for a moment.

I try to always think which course of action will I look back on and think, "that was the right priority."
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Old 11-07-2018, 02:23 PM
 
Location: SoCal
13,221 posts, read 6,320,879 times
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I didn’t have any trepidation. Nobody was dying around me. Why my sister had 3 friends who died before collecting SS, yet she’s still working, possibly till 66 or FRA. Go figure.
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Old 11-07-2018, 02:43 PM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
5,774 posts, read 4,830,089 times
Reputation: 19395
This type of feeling towards retirement strikes me as someone whose identity is all wrapped up in WHAT THEY DO rather than WHO THEY ARE. Like a doctor who says "what am I if I'm not a doctor anymore?" Well, you're a woman (or man), a mom (or maybe not), a grandmom (or again maybe not), a sister, a daughter, you're a compassionate individual, a giver, a gardener (or quilter, or whatever), a learner, a teacher, a friend, etc. For better or worse, we are all fellow travelers on the planet, and we all can be or do what we want, to some degree, in retirement. Or at least as much as our budget and imagination can find a way to accomplish.

Being fearful or nervous about retirement, that's no different than being frightened to get married, or have a child, or join the military, or go out on your own as a young adult. It's just another phase of life that we face. You can face it with joy and expectation, or stand shivering on the edge of the diving board, afraid to jump in. Your choice.
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Old 11-07-2018, 03:02 PM
 
6,306 posts, read 5,051,434 times
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Didn't say if she had kids.

anyway - she learned early to play the money game and that is why she doesn't want to quit. Kind of like gambling. She needs a source of income to make more money and not use the money she already has to make more money.


I don't think it is fear, it is an addiction. She likes seeing that money grow. Nothing wrong with that - I guess.
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Old 11-07-2018, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,627 posts, read 19,955,234 times
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Money is security, and some need to feel more secure than others. I wouldn't hint at anything negative about the personality.
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