As you've gotten older, would you prefer people not give you gifts? (friend, years)

[Over the hill gang]

My husband I don't feel we need gifts at Christmas. A few people always want to know what we'd like as a gift and each year I say, the truth is we don't want or need anything. I worked hard to get rid of all the excess we'd had for years.

[brightdoglover]

I've always felt that way about "stuff." Of course, I appreciate the thought but far prefer either being taken out to eat or a charitable donation.
My late elderly friend Pat always appreciated flowers but was thrilled the year she had her cataracts fixed and I donated to Seva Foundation, which does cataract surgery in poor countries.

[Clemencia53]

yes - I tell people, if I can't spend it or eat it, I don't want it!

[jghorton]

A few years back, we started seeking-out and exchanging ministry giving opportunities with our grown children ... instead of gifts of more stuff. None of us really need or particularly want more 'stuff,' but, there are always people in need who do. (Even the children like getting in on this type of giving)

-- It's also the type of 'gift' that one 'receives' when they give it.

[Johnhw2]

Ive been this way since I was 30 and still feel this way.


Wife grew up loving presents which were a big deal in her family. Took me 10 years to get her to expect no presents. If she needs something she gets iw ehn that need arises not when the calendar strikes a certain date.


We have some kind of Hallmark Holiday every week it seems.. wonder what that is all about.. selling cards ? We are too things focused and not enough people focused

[Spuggy]

I don’t tend to dictate or tell others what they should or should do regarding gifts. If they ask then that’s different and I will offer small gift ideas. People can never go wrong buying me art supplies or craft store gift card . My best friend enjoys making/buying gifts and I’m not going to take that pleasure away from her.

[NewbieHere]

We feel the same way, what we want we get it regardless of whether it’s Xmas or not. But I get some small gifts like books, CDs, See’s Candies for my husband. I don’t remember what he got me last year. But our kids still enjoy opening gifts Xmas day, so the whole experience is for them. But at least they don’t get up super early like 5am like they used to do as kids to open Xmas gifts. They are young adults now.

[North Beach Person]

Yes.
So my kids have solved the problem, well 3 of the 4 have, by buying me what they would like then asking to "borrow" it. TV series sets, CDs, stuff like that.

My oldest son has complained if I've bought myself a watch without consulting him. You know, to see if he likes it.

[ReachTheBeach]

In the immediate family, we have started using Amazon wish lists exclusively. You can link other places or link nowhere with a description to buy something locally if you don't like Amazon or can't get something there. The idea is to only get people things they really want and/or will use. I have recreational items on mine, but I also have a belt, a shirt and some socks. We put more things on than we expect to get so that there is some element of surprise, but not the element of getting something you won't use. I prefer not getting gifts from others outside the family because it is unlikely to be something I want or need and then makes me feel obligated to get them something they probably don't want or need.

[Minervah]

I used to have a friend who had an usual philosophy regarding gift giving. She never gave gifts for birthdays, Christmas or any of the other typical gift giving occasions. She believed the best gifts were unexpected gifts. If she was out and about and saw something she thought something someone she knew would like she would buy it and give it to them. She thought that type of gift was much more appreciated than an obligatory gift.

She was a very unconventional person. One of my favorite people.