Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
And your kids moved (or grandkids with their paerents-aka your kids) in a year or so. What did you do? Moved again to be close again? Stay put or what?
If my children moved I wouldn't mind moving a few years after they got settled at their new address. If it is a drivable distance, I would not move. If it was in another state, I would take a long vacation and see if I liked living in that new state. If I liked living there, I would rent out my house and then rent a house in the new state. If all looked good, I would sell my house and then buy a new one near my kids.
I like doing things slowly and deliberately.
By the time you do all of that, your kids may have decided that they didn't like it there after all and move home.
Whatever you do, don't sell your house and move in with your kids. That rarely works out.
It hasn’t happened to us yet so It’s impossible to answer the question because it would depend on where our son would move. If he got a job in California then no chance we’d move there,but I’d consider New Mexico or Oregon . So far it looks like he’s here for a while so we just enjoy the time we have here in AZ and don’t stress about what if’s.
Our kids are rapidly approach 40, one couple can't have kids and the other will age out prior to even considering the possibility. Neither couple has established their permanent roots anywhere.
Moot point for us but we would not be doing this (moving to the kids) just because of the risk of their more transient lives taking them elsewhere. We know multiple retired couples in a similar situation (kids and grand-kids out of area) and only one couple pulled up stakes to move.
I think it's a mistake to move just to be nearer to your grand kids.
One risk is that your kids may move in order to take advantage of a career opportunity. Also, your kids deserve breathing space. If you move too close, you could end up smothering them. They need room to live their own lives.
For us, it's an easy decision. Our kids live in San Fran, one of the most expensive places!
So we remain in Colorado and frequently visit. A trip there is 2 hours via DEN-SFO. Our kids maintain a guest room for their frequent visitors. This works well.
Obviously one would have to be clear whether they are moving to be away from family-- but assuming it is strictly other reasons ( job, location ) and they want us to move, it would definitely be a possibility. It would very much depend on their new location, and proximity to the old. We did move to be near them, but it was a combination -retiring, downsizing etc. Where we were previously was a very unfriendly drive (not so much distance but time and quality- not pleasant at all- but maybe 90 minutes all told). Where we moved to is just a touch over 30 minutes, but is a very easy pleasant back roads kind of drive which is lovely. We see them often , and to me the really sweet part is that it doesn't have to be a whole production and a whole day. We can pop by for a visit for a couple of hours (or more) but it's not a big deal as it was previously. (the drive was so miserable that it kind of defined the day).
We were definitely looking to move from the area we were in, and we really do like the new area, but of course, have not planted roots so all of this would be up for consideration. That said, I really think they are staying where they are.
As I recall, in my childhood - we moved closer to Grandma - from CA to MI and when she left Ann Arbor to a small town where her brother lived - We went there too when my brother had trouble in High School. I'm still working but found a benefit - we planned to retire in TX - and I was able to get a paid move from AZ back to TX and now I'm 30 minutes from 2 of my granddaughters and daughter. I am not retiring here per se, but somewhere within a 4 hour drive or so from here.
First make sure the kids want you there. They did move away from family. They most likely put job ahead of family before and may do it again.
Now for the unpopular statement. Those cute grandchildren turn into teenagers. Do you think they are going to hang out with Gramps?
there is some truth to this.
The time to influence and be remembered fondly by grandchildren is being with them in their young years. If you miss that bubble, then they become more interested and involved in/with their friends and sports teams than even their parents much less old stinking grandparents.
Go or stay where YOU can have the life you want and make your plans. Now if that is 2 or 3 hours or minutes away from them, cool.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
