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Piggybacking off these other "regret" threads, I thought I'd throw this one out there.
I work in a back office corporate role. I'm the guy everyone complains to if things aren't working, but I'm never thanked or acknowledged if things are running well. I'm in IT, but I run business systems. Truthfully, all the software I run is for the 8-5 business crowd.
At the end of the day, almost all of it is meaningless BS. Important to the business side of things, but not important to the public, and I'm damn sure not helping society in any way. I'm not a nurse and helping anyone. I'm not offering solutions to people in the public needing meaningful advice. I'm not a teacher inspiring the next generation. I'm not a first-responder protecting the public. What I do is just lucrative enough to keep you there, not lucrative enough to get wealthy at, and is some of the most ultimately meaningless, drama-filled, posturing garbage under the sun.
We've had some changes recently that are very negative to work-life balance. I'm not a company guy - never have been. These recent changes are basically the straw breaking my back. I'm out at the first reasonable offer I get.
All these weekends working for this bunch over issues that could wait to business hours is very discouraging. As my finances have improved, I'm taking stock at the realistic options available to me. The less time I am at a place like, the better, and I'm now able to take somewhat of a pay cut to do so.
Do you regret spending as much time at work as you did? What adjustments would you make looking back and what advice would you give to a younger person?
Do you regret spending as much time at work as you did?
No, not all. There was an ebb and flow to new product design. Sometimes you have to put in the hours.
You know, I'd never thought about it. I wonder if the newer models for software development were created to keep teams in crisis mode 100% of the time.
OP: I worked for other people so I had to do what I was told. I needed a paycheck. Even if I had my own business those people work LONG hours and days. I see you here and I think are only 30something, are you retired? Or maybe I'm thinking someone else. Oh well.
Do I regret how much time I spent at work? Not at all. My goal was to stay in that job long enough to pay for a good retirement. I met my goal, and have no regrets about doing that. If I had left earlier I wouldn't have this retirement. I also made the best of that job, focusing on the good and finding ways to not complain about the bad. Don't regret doing those things, either.
I agree with people who point out work has its ebbs and flows. Tedious tasks and long hours? Absolutely. You mentioned fire/rescue as a more meaningful career. That's what I did, and sure, it was meaningful at times. There were also days that were monotonous, and many times I had to put in long hours and work in miserable conditions. Yes, I happened to like my career choice, but I think that may be more about attitude than about the job itself. That's probably why I felt it was a good job (mostly).
So no, I don't regret the time I put in there. I had friends, there were many interesting days interwoven with the boring ones, it paid the bills. You can't ask for more than that.
You asked for advice, so even though we've said this before: If you really hate what you do get another job, move, end the relationships. If you aren't willing to do that then find ways to be happy. The end.
Nihilism might be a good thing to take up. In other words, don't waste time caring if whether what you're doing has any meaning; you choose a job that fits your abilities and seems reasonably pleasant, and then you do the work to make money (not to give meaning to your life). People talk about the meaninglessness of life like it’s a bad thing. Is it? I get it, it's harder to get excited about your day when you wake up knowing that nothing you do matters in the grand scheme. But maybe the problem is being excited about your day is over-rated.
Also, I get that you feel really miserable right now. But, FWIW if you stop working before you can afford to do so, you'll only increase your misery. Look at it this way, work pays the bills, and that has meaning. I'd also advise that you stop spending quite so many of your work hours posting on social media. Seriously, things at work might go a lot better for you if you did that.
Last edited by Piney Creek; 03-03-2019 at 08:46 PM..
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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I spent 16 years as a business owner and during that time I did spend too much time working, but still managed to attend the kids' events with good help allowing me to leave early when needed. It was the big jobs and hard deadlines causing me to go in early and stay late, work weekends or even overnight that were the problem. In my 17 year career before the and the current (10 years) since I have been fortunate enough to have early start and end times. Due to the nature of my work, it's beneficial for me to be here before the others to do some of the more technical work and make sure systems are up and running without problems before they get here. Currently I start at 5:00am and leave at 1:30pm, and only stay late rarely, for meetings. At 66 now I still enjoy my work and the people I work with, and am not in any hurry to retire. At this point I would expect to stay to 70.
Late 30’s here and over the “work” thing. I’ve mostly been in Corporate America and am now in somewhat of a public sector / municipality role. While it’s so much better than Corporate America (fewer expectations and less stress), at the end of the day it’s work. Drag out of bed to an alarm clock to go spend 8 hours a day, 5 days in a week, chained to a desk doing work that isn’t very meaningful. It’s a paycheck. No one owes us anything. It’s one of the better jobs I’ve had, but it’s a job. It pays for life, and that’s it. Yes, most of the week is depressing for me, and the thought of doing this for 25-28 more years is nauseating, but I suppose this is how life is set up.
I chose a career path that shouldn’t and usually doesn’t require more than 40 hours a week. I value my real life too much. I try to enjoy life as much as possible outside of work. I’ve had some roles that required more, and I despised the long hours. Got out of that. To me, the 40 hour week is antiquated. In almost every single job after college, I could get my work done in 2-3 hours most of the time. We have technology now that enables us to be more efficient, especially if we manage our time wisely and avoid pointless meetings. I think it’s the amount of time spent at jobs that’s so draining. Anyone could put up with something a few hours a day for a few days a week. I can’t focus or be productive much more than that anyway.
I’ve always done well in school, was raised by great parents to do my best, etc. After over 20 years in the workforce (worked full time in college), and 15 or so years in the professional world working various jobs I’ve wanted in various industries, none have stuck out as something I’ve loved. Sometimes you just go with whatever you can make the most money with the least amount of BS and tolerate it.
I love this forum because I get to see the perspectives of those in retirement and to get an idea of what’s ahead. Some have been blessed to have a calling and do what they love. Others are older versions of me that just looked at the finish line. It’s no fun to wish your life away though. All the “what do you do in retirement?” threads are spot on...whatever you want. It’s the freedom I desire, but a secure paycheck is very valuable. I think working part time on something you love would be ideal, but that’s not reality. I have looked toward doing that as I approach retirement age. The huge setback is finding affordable health insurance. I think many would drop to part time as early as possible if it weren’t for that.
Piggybacking off these other "regret" threads, I thought I'd throw this one out there.
I work in a back office corporate role. I'm the guy everyone complains to if things aren't working, but I'm never thanked or acknowledged if things are running well. I'm in IT, but I run business systems. Truthfully, all the software I run is for the 8-5 business crowd.
At the end of the day, almost all of it is meaningless BS. Important to the business side of things, but not important to the public, and I'm damn sure not helping society in any way. I'm not a nurse and helping anyone. I'm not offering solutions to people in the public needing meaningful advice. I'm not a teacher inspiring the next generation. I'm not a first-responder protecting the public. What I do is just lucrative enough to keep you there, not lucrative enough to get wealthy at, and is some of the most ultimately meaningless, drama-filled, posturing garbage under the sun.
We've had some changes recently that are very negative to work-life balance. I'm not a company guy - never have been. These recent changes are basically the straw breaking my back. I'm out at the first reasonable offer I get.
All these weekends working for this bunch over issues that could wait to business hours is very discouraging. As my finances have improved, I'm taking stock at the realistic options available to me. The less time I am at a place like, the better, and I'm now able to take somewhat of a pay cut to do so.
Do you regret spending as much time at work as you did? What adjustments would you make looking back and what advice would you give to a younger person?
I was involved in the startup and operation of two nuclear power units over a period of twelve years which coincided with my son growing up . It seems I spent every minute of the twelve years at the plant, so yes I sometimes regret it.
Last edited by Southern man; 03-04-2019 at 09:47 AM..
The only time I worked overtime was in my 20's - when I actually had the energy - working in an ICU/CCU and staffing was short and they asked me to help in the overnight shift.
I willing did it because they needed me and the OT pay was excellent. There were no regrets.
Otherwise I have never had to work more than 40 hours in any job I have ever held.
Regret the time spent at work? No, not really, only when it became clear it wasn't work that interested me.
I reinvented myself approximately once a decade while I was in the work world. Now I work for myself and I never tire of it. Work where I want, when I want, as much as I want and if I don't work at all the money still keeps coming in.
I work so I can keep doing what I'm doing now: Sitting in my Southwestern-style home in Arizona, having a leisurely Sunday breakfast and having solved one major problem with the place, trying to decide what to work on next.
Here's one problem I never had to cope with back in California: A couple of arms falling off a saguaro (cactus) overnight.
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