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Old 05-21-2019, 08:00 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,191 posts, read 6,301,958 times
Reputation: 9808

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Quote:
Originally Posted by YorktownGal View Post
Actually, it was the rise of private and government student loans that drove up prices

https://www.forbes.com/sites/preston.../#51d0a03752b6
Yeap, unintended consequence.
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Old 05-21-2019, 11:12 AM
 
3,247 posts, read 842,766 times
Reputation: 3758
Quote:
Originally Posted by YorktownGal View Post
Actually, it was the rise of private and government student loans that drove up prices

https://www.forbes.com/sites/preston.../#51d0a03752b6
Additional money is additional money. I agree with you that loans accounted for more than parent's help. Parents "helped" prices rise.

We keep making the same mistake in the US with higher education... with medical care...

You can't make something MORE ACCESSIBLE while keeping all of the industry for-profit! It practically burns money and drives up prices in the process.
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Old 05-21-2019, 11:53 AM
 
29,764 posts, read 34,851,819 times
Reputation: 11675
Yes, we did multiple things including helping with college, first home purchase, wedding, assorted other ways that added up. Why because we wanted to and could. One of the things we did was to buy a car when each started college and when they graduated gave it to them so they had a quality used car. We enjoyed it for the years we drove it then they got a paid for car that had been well maintained etc. One other thing we did not because they needed us to but because we thought it was cool was to buy the diapers for the grand kids. The last of our twins and are in the pull up stage and then free at last free at last. Hopefully they will understand it was a diaper for diaper program and we covered their rear ends as little folk and when we get old if they needed they will change our diapers.
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Old 05-21-2019, 01:27 PM
 
Location: DFW
549 posts, read 153,080 times
Reputation: 869
I have never been able to put money away, no savings, no retirement. I have my paycheck and that's about it. Living like this is a cumulative effect, starting with my own student loans and cars and apartments, etc, because my parents never bought me so much as a stick of chewing gum. You are doing the right thing!

- both girls got a car at 16, though it was a hand-me-down from mom (I got the new one)
- both girls were helped as needed if short on rent, etc
- both girls got to have assistance from the PLUS (parents) loan, as well as me co-signing for private college loans

If, by some miracle, I ever do have anything, yes, I would gladly give it to my kids.
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Old 05-21-2019, 02:59 PM
 
29,764 posts, read 34,851,819 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by biscuitmom View Post
We paid for college and 1st cars; nothing for weddings or home purchases.

A couple of years ago, after much discussion, analysis, conversations with each other, our sons, and with our accountants and attorney, we decided we'd start now giving an annual amount (less than the gift tax exclusion) to our sons now rather than wait and leave it all to them when we die.

No strings attached & no questions asked as to how they use/spend it.

Why? Because we can afford it without jeopardizing our present or future needs, because our sons although hard-working can use the funds now, and there will still be some for them to inherit. We're very sure that if the situation were reversed, i.e., if their financial situations were rock solid and we were the ones lacking, they'd be right there helping us.
Bada Bing!
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Old 05-21-2019, 08:18 PM
 
Location: Eugene, Oregon
9,125 posts, read 2,994,022 times
Reputation: 13762
Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger View Post
There is an article on the MSN Money page today regarding retirees and pre-retirees giving sums of money to their children for home purchases. I am substituting "Kick-Start" as the terminology in place of "home purchase" because funds transferred may have been used for homes, student loan debt repayment, initial funds for retirement savings investments, etc.

So how many of us have done this, or considered doing it and decided to not do it, and why?



Starting off:
  • Yes we did it.
  • Dollar amounts to remain confidential.
  • Financial Advisor thought we were Nuts but developed a plan for us
  • We did it to "pay forward" in the same manner my wife and I benefited from unannounced money gifts from my parents when our household and family were young. Why make our children wait, and potentially struggle financially, for decades until our deaths?
  • No strings attached other than each couple was told 5-6 months in advance that this would be happening, what the dollar amount would be, and asked to determine their own plan of how they would use the money.
I fully expect to be called Nuts by this forum too. Oh well, we are all different.

I favor the "Kick-Butt" approach, where the kids are given the boot and make it entirely on their own.
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Old 05-22-2019, 05:38 AM
 
4,069 posts, read 1,551,316 times
Reputation: 7404
6 pages of mostly humble brags...
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Old 05-22-2019, 05:42 AM
 
29,764 posts, read 34,851,819 times
Reputation: 11675
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckeye77 View Post
6 pages of mostly humble brags...
Yup, many of us our proud of our kids accomplishments and the support we provided in helping them to get there! Hoping they pass it on to the grands and keep upper mobility going across future generations.
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Old 05-22-2019, 05:58 AM
 
Location: Western North Carolina
4,948 posts, read 7,873,797 times
Reputation: 10420
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr5150 View Post
A word to the wise; unless you have money to burn let your kids find their own way. Like we all did back in the day.
Different times, though.
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Old 05-22-2019, 06:10 AM
 
29,764 posts, read 34,851,819 times
Reputation: 11675
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr5150 View Post
I keep reading these articles on how to screw up your retirement financially. One major point was giving your kids money. We decreased our retirement reserves by about 15%. Nothing to do with college. A word to the wise; unless you have money to burn let your kids find their own way. Like we all did back in the day.
Maybe that was your experience back in the day but to say like we all did is false. Many of us had parental support in the ways mentioned today and our parents were not by any measurement affluent. For ages upper social mobility for children has been the goal of many parents and it will continue to be. Some will choose that path for their family structure and goals and others won't and the chips will fall where they will.

Parenting and how to best to do it is in reality subjective. One of the resulting outcomes is that for better or worse, we often get to experience the fruit or lack of in our senior years. So what ever our parenting style and decision making as been let it all result in supportive children who see us as worthy and deserving of their support in our declining years.

This is a fascinating top for those of us who are actually seniors with grown kids and grand kids. We can see with our very eyes if we did it right and can now smile with contentment if we are happy with the results.
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