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Old 05-26-2019, 07:37 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,939 posts, read 5,293,703 times
Reputation: 17896

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Quote:
Originally Posted by K12144 View Post
Somehow I don't think leaving your apartment to go downstairs for a few hours and sit and eat is akin to running, walking all over a festival or other event, rock climbing, dance classes, frequent music rehearsals, hiking, painting on location, traveling, going for a long drive, going to concerts, or any of the other things a person may have enjoyed when they were younger.
Who said it was? Are you doing the same things now that you did 50 years ago?
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Old 05-26-2019, 09:38 PM
 
11,262 posts, read 8,414,613 times
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I'm 58, aiming for retirement at 62. (gov't)
I love my career. I might keep it up.
Then yesterday, standing in line for my cholesterol medicine at Walgreens, I thought "they could use help, I could be really good at that". Am I already planning a part time gig for after I retire?
I should be writing... Ugh. What was the question?
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Old 05-27-2019, 06:30 AM
 
Location: Former LI'er Now Rehoboth Beach, DE
7,862 posts, read 10,545,026 times
Reputation: 7934
Quote:
Originally Posted by NoMoreSnowForMe View Post
I don't miss working at all. I have other hobbies and interests that take up my time, and I have a lot of relaxing time like taking my dog to a park and reading a book. I do a lot of cooking and canning, some gardening, etc. I don't miss office politics one iota.

I would guess the problem is they haven't found other hobbies or interests to fill their time. Or some people just like to complain - whether it's about the job they have, or the one they wished they had, etc., etc.

What I've found in 55+ senior buildings is that the people with a lot of interests are the ones you never see. They are off doing things. The ones hanging around complaining are the ones I run into who want to talk - the ones always in the lobby or community room. So, my guess is you just aren't meeting the people who are happy with their hobbies or volunteer jobs or outside interests, because they're off enjoying them.
Everything ^^. Also, it is indeed possible that many have become victims of their own health problems and therefore are more sedentary and wish for the "good old days".
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Old 05-27-2019, 07:56 AM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,699 posts, read 23,651,778 times
Reputation: 35449
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piney Creek View Post
To each his own. For me, worrying about goals in retirement feels too much like work. One thing I've loved about being retired is the feeling of being free. I just do whatever happens to amuse me each day, without wondering if it's accomplishing a goal (for the most part, although I do have a few goals at the gym). It works for me, but everyone's different. Do what works for you.

I do think it helps if you avoid watching hour after hour of tv. Although sometimes that's fun, too. I'm also a fan of doing things with other people. I enjoy volunteering at the rec center, and if you think a certain volunteer task is simply "busy work" I suggest trying something else. There are lots of ways to volunteer. It's sad to me to see people talking about volunteering in general as something that "seems like trying to waste time until one dies" but I guess it's not for everyone. For us it's been a fun thing to do, and a great way to meet friends who have similar interests.


Having said all this, retirement isn't for everyone. If you love your job and can continue doing it, I say go for it! Do whatever makes you happy.
Absolutely!
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Old 05-27-2019, 08:07 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,191 posts, read 6,301,958 times
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The only goal I have is for my husband and I to stay alive and reasonably healthy.
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Old 05-27-2019, 09:20 AM
 
57 posts, read 16,265 times
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I'd be bored out of my mind in a "55 community."

What do people do there besides play cards and gossip? Hanging around a bunch of old people would suck too. How many times can you listen to someone prattle on about his/her medical problems or grandkids before you want to pull your hair out?

There are plenty of 55+ year old people who have the mindset of 30 years olds. They are active, travel, go hiking/boating/whatever, and have interesting lives. I get the impression that "55 communities" are more for old people who act old.
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Old 05-27-2019, 09:43 AM
 
57 posts, read 16,265 times
Reputation: 225
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChristineVA View Post
OP, my mother (75) could probably relate to you.

She worked all her life and for the last 30 years, was in a very high-stress government job. Ten hour days, long commute. But she actually loved her work, enjoyed her coworkers etc. It was the pace that wore her down. When she was about 69 years old, she finally retired mainly because of exhaustion. She decompressed for about 6 months and found she was kind of bored and missed her old job (but not the pace). She was contacted by them to come back to work for them as a contract worker, working remotely, for 20 hours a week at her old hourly rate. She took that and did it for about 3 years and it seemed the best of both worlds. At the same time, my father is retired and he is the type that is perfectly happy sitting at home reading a book, doing a puzzle, cutting the grass, going to the grocery store (not my mom).

So, after her second retirement, they did find that where they live is not really great for retired people. They live in a townhouse community that is full of commuters, renters, etc. They found they had no connections. They have bought a second home at The Villages and they just returned from being there for 6 months. They have made some friends and they have had some get togethers and they really like it; however, my sense is that my mother (at least) is still missing something and I think that's work. She does speak wistfully of some of the other residents she's met that have little part time work so I wouldn't be surprised if maybe she doesn't try something like that.

I think some people just need to have a purpose/duty. Some people need formal work to feel productive. It probably has a lot to do with how you spent your life and maybe how much your purpose at work was integral to your identity.
I am not and have never been one of those people. Work has always been nothing more than a means to an end for me. "Work" has always consisted of dealing with bosses and coworkers who I haven't cared for and being told what to do all day. I've never liked it and have always just slogged through it for the money.

My real life starts after work. That's when I get to do what I want and with who I want. That's what "retirement" is all about and why pursuing it has always been a high priority ever since I started working. I'm very grateful that we do have the ability to invest and break free from serfdom. There are many people all over the world who can't.
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Old 05-27-2019, 10:00 AM
 
188 posts, read 170,500 times
Reputation: 433
Quote:
Originally Posted by Surfer Guy View Post
I'd be bored out of my mind in a "55 community."

What do people do there besides play cards and gossip? Hanging around a bunch of old people would suck too. How many times can you listen to someone prattle on about his/her medical problems or grandkids before you want to pull your hair out?

There are plenty of 55+ year old people who have the mindset of 30 years olds. They are active, travel, go hiking/boating/whatever, and have interesting lives. I get the impression that "55 communities" are more for old people who act old.
Why do you think you can't do all of the activities you want to do and still live in a 55+ community? There is not a lock on the gate, you can leave to pursue any interest you may have. You may actually be surprised to find that many residents share your interests!
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Old 05-27-2019, 10:17 AM
 
3,934 posts, read 3,258,558 times
Reputation: 11277
[quote=happyinca;55261698] "What I find interesting is many of the people tell me how lucky I am that I am still working and how much they miss working. I am talking about people in their 80's and 90's. They tell me things like "never quit working".


Anecdotal evidence has it's roots in the unsound notion that a little information will suffice just as well as a scholarly study. From years of perusing the myriad of studies done with retirement satisfaction polls I'd have to say that most of those living in retirement seem pretty well adjusted and have little desire to return to work. That said, there will always be the minority who find retired life nearly impossible to navigate.

Back to the OP regarding life in the over 55 communities--Whether or not one will like the quiet and cleanliness of those older neighbors is not the most pressing consideration when choosing your landing spot in retirement. Nor is the fear of being sucked in to a kind of Stepford Wives environment a valid worry. But, the one thing that certainly does draw the aging American to his own kind is a simple wish to be socially relevant once again.

That relevancy is sorely lacking when the aged are among the young, that invisibility that bothers a lot of seniors is understandable, but only by those who have felt it in large doses. I'm OK with not being at the center of things, and I realize that we are supposed step back to allow the young to grow, but that invisibility does become a sore point after years of fading deeper into the background of the social landscape. Even in our family we seem to have become little more than lawn statuary when we get together with our adult children and the Grandkids. We just don't have much to talk about with them, and they certainly have no social frame of reference that would allow for a convo with over seventy types like grandpa and grandma..

When visiting Arizona friends a few years ago we loved going to their community bar and grill for happy hour and seeing so many of our gray haired cohort, people were actually being friendly, inviting us to sit with them when tables were scarce, old people laughing and talking, looking like they were having a great time and most definitely were. I for one wouldn't want the coffee klatch lifestyle at this age, but there is no reason to feel as though that is a requirement in over 55 communities, live and let live seems to be the order of the day for most people regardless of their lifestyle or address.
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Old 05-27-2019, 10:27 AM
 
923 posts, read 253,784 times
Reputation: 2529
Quote:
Originally Posted by thinkalot View Post
Who said it was? Are you doing the same things now that you did 50 years ago?
Nope, because I didn't exist then. But I'm doing many of the same things I did 25 years ago and have picked up new interests besides. I don't expect my interests and hobbies to change in the next 25 years. Do you think people's interests change just because their physical abilities do? I know plenty of people who are "bored" because they are no longer able to do the things that interest them.

The post I was replying to was from someone who didn't understand why these people are bored, because apparently "not being immobile and confined to one's apartment" is the same thing as "able to get out and do whatever one wants." I could round up for you a whole battalion of aging people who would laugh at that idea, and who also would say old folks' barbecues are no substitute for doing the sorts of fun activities they wish they still could do.

But, you know, if that works for you, that's fine. Just don't expect it to work for everyone.
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