In retirement, do you go to church/synagogue/mosque? (65+, conversation, community)
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Interesting- that's certainly not why DH and I joined or why I still attend- but I put a lot of time into planning his funeral (he was cremated and the funeral was a couple of months later after the Christmas holidays) and it really meant a lot to me and to our fellow church members who all knew and loved him. (He was famous for baking cookies for the coffee hour.)
OTOH, my parents belonged to a very large church for decades and when my mother died I wasn't impressed with the funeral. It followed Roman Catholic traditions but the priest lacked warmth (al he could offer was a wooden "I'm sorry for your loss") and clearly didn't know Mom so his homily was vague, and the soloist was mediocre. Dad said it wasn't one of their usual musicians and he'd never seen her before. Really unfortunate, but the gathering of family and friends afterwards was meaningful.
I am so sorry that you had to bury both your parents AND your husband. That's tough. I hope you are doing well since the death of your husband -- you seem to be.
I was a hospice volunteer, off and on, for 17 years. I quit in my early 60s, because dying and death started to hit too close to home. I'm laughing -- but I'm serious -- I started seeing my future in my patients.
As for marriage -- I divorced my second husband over 20 years ago. And as strange as it may seem (I do have men friends -- FRIENDS -- by the way), I've always been grateful that I've never had another serious love relationship/marriage, since my second divorce, because I simply can't imagine losing a beloved spouse. I've lost a daughter and too many friends -- that was more than enough grieving for me.
(A bit of humor?): I had a good friend, who is now dead, who always used to say, with a laugh, "At our age, we HAVE to keep making new friends, because the old ones keep dying!")
We go twice a year as always, Christmas and Easter. When my kids were younger, we did go more often. I’m not as religious as my husband was, I just tagged along for support, but lately he is less enamored with the church with all the sex scandals and stuff. And some church can get real political and preachy.
With that said, one of my kids is a frequent church goer and she volunteers for the church quite a bit. It’s good to know that she found something to help deal with things in life, hence she is doing really well with her business. So we go to her church twice a year, both to see her and also because that’s where we may meet somebody she knows. We don’t know the people at the local church anymore.
I came from a Christian family and was the only black sheep of the family, a alcoholic for 20 years and now sober for 36 years.
I started back at church 15 years ago and am now a believer and love church. Some people use any little excuse to not go to church but I look forward to it. And am hurrying to type as I will get dressed and leave as soon as done here.
All my friends and pretty well everybody I know now in retirement is a Christian. I go to a big church Sat. night, a different big church Sunday, Tuesday morning a 125 people senors group at one of those churches, Friday morning bulletin stuffing at the same church, a big social event for us senors. I have a lot of friends ans social support and love it.
Congratulations on your sobriety. HUGE congratulations. I've never been an alcoholic (my addiction is smoking), but one of my sons and my sister have been life-long alcoholics, and I know how difficult it is to make that first step and stay with it. I wish you THE VERY BEST.
In retirement, do you attend church/synagogue/mosque, and do you attend frequently, somewhat regularly, rarely or not at all? And why do you or don't you?....
I would except there is no meeting place near me, only one several hundred km to the north of me. I have followed their development over the years and have contributed regularly though. Thus, any sit-down time with my religion has been a solitary habit for the past twenty years, which I do once or twice a day for about forty minutes. However, as group meetings are rather like those of the Friends/Quakers, i.e. silent, being alone with it is not a dramatic deprivation.
Nope. I was raised Catholic but became an atheist at around age 13 and the only time I've been inside a church or other religious structure since then was on a couple of European vacations, out of historical interest (such as Westminster Abbey and St. Paul's in London, and Notre Dame in Paris.) I avoid religious ceremonies whenever I can; I think the last church wedding I attended was in the 1970s when my then-husband's brother got married for the second time. T-H was the best man so I couldn't get out of attending that one, LOL.
Nope. I was raised Catholic but became an atheist at around age 13 and the only time I've been inside a church or other religious structure since then was on a couple of European vacations, out of historical interest (such as Westminster Abbey and St. Paul's in London, and Notre Dame in Paris.) I avoid religious ceremonies whenever I can; I think the last church wedding I attended was in the 1970s when my then-husband's brother got married for the second time. T-H was the best man so I couldn't get out of attending that one, LOL.
I love old churches in Europe btw, even as a non religious person.
Interesting -- The Pew Foundation did a poll/survey about 20 years ago, and it found that the No. 1 reason people attend church is so that there will be someone to officiate and attend their funeral. Social connections was second. I forget what the third was. The fourth reason was "worshiping God".
Understandable. As a Protestant, I do not need to be in a church to worship God, I have my faith with me all the time. I think perhaps this concept is more foreign to Catholics, who are spoon fed everything by the priests.
I donate to our local church when they ask for help to support fire victims, but in general I have found the church to be just group think protecting their own ideas, so I keep them at arm's length. Sad, as they helped my dad who died at the age of 31 after a life of health problems. I have a photo of him as a teenager in an old style wheel chair at the Catholic hospital, it looks like a board with wheels under it. That could not have been comfortable for him but from what Grandma said, the sisters were very good to him.
Like some other posters, I think the values taught in our churches are important to community social structure but they have become too political and money driven.
I would think this is pretty much the case. The fact that one has retired likely doesn't play a role in one's religious views.
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