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My husband and I spend very little time apart. When we first got married he even went to the grocery store with me and that continued but lately he has gone alone because of my back. He once told me if he wanted to spend time without me he wouldn't have gotten married. I feel very fortunate to have him, he's one in a million. I've read about some couples lately that died within minutes or hours from each other, I tend to think that will happen with us.
Being divorced so long and being my own boss and NOT having some one control me is My Way of living....my daughter was married to a person who controlled her every move and she was so sick, another story but time on one's own is a GOOD thing. And it;s true when one dies the other one can't live on, I say Bull to that one.
Okay - this might not be a retirement question, but the people that i personally know that do this are retirement age
What is up with this?
(snip)
Do people just stay married for convenience? Is that necessary in this day and age?
Just asking....
Is the question, "why stay ostensibly 'married' if the couple spends more time than not with friends or others, or even on independent trips?"
Answer: dunno, why would they 'stay' married, or even better 'get' married, outside of child rearing?
I find it an abhorrent thought. My 'partner' is a booty call, she's a nice person who occasionally tries to reel me in for more, with zero success. She'll dump me eventually if she has ANY brains, but until then it's not my problem. People believe whatever gibberish they want. I just take off when I can't stand the sight of her, and (much to her chagrin) we get back together weeks later. I'm in my 50s, she 40s. Who cares, end of the day: I do fun things on my own, hauling her around is no different than chaining a dead sea bird around my neck.
To raise children, I do believe marriage is a great idea. For others, it's dullsville in the extreme and a totally unacceptable boat anchor.
Is the question, "why stay ostensibly 'married' if the couple spends more time than not with friends or others, or even on independent trips?"
Answer: dunno, why would they 'stay' married, or even better 'get' married, outside of child rearing?
I find it an abhorrent thought. My 'partner' is a booty call, she's a nice person who occasionally tries to reel me in for more, with zero success. She'll dump me eventually if she has ANY brains, but until then it's not my problem. People believe whatever gibberish they want. I just take off when I can't stand the sight of her, and (much to her chagrin) we get back together weeks later. I'm in my 50s, she 40s. Who cares, end of the day: I do fun things on my own, hauling her around is no different than chaining a dead sea bird around my neck.
To raise children, I do believe marriage is a great idea. For others, it's dullsville in the extreme and a totally unacceptable boat anchor.
Reminds me of how women want their husbands to go shopping with them for everything, I can't imagine that in my life. Sit around near a dressing room while they try things on, good grief.
Being divorced so long and being my own boss and NOT having some one control me is My Way of living....my daughter was married to a person who controlled her every move and she was so sick, another story but time on one's own is a GOOD thing. And it;s true when one dies the other one can't live on, I say Bull to that one.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaminhealth
Reminds me of how women want their husbands to go shopping with them for everything, I can't imagine that in my life. Sit around near a dressing room while they try things on, good grief.
Just because it's not your choice doesn't make it wrong or unbearable. My husband has never been controlling, we just enjoy each others company and prefer to be together. And there are numerous cases where a spouse has died and the other passed SOON after so it's not bull. Hard as it might be for you to believe, true, unconditional love is rare in this day and age but it does exist. Another case was Debbie Reynolds. While it wasn't her spouse.....She loved her daughter so deeply she said she wanted to be with Carrie so she could take care of her, she passed one day after the death of her daughter, Carrie Fisher.
And I hate shopping, I especially hate shopping for clothes but on occasion my husband has sat while I tried something on and gladly I might add. I have done as much for him while he shopped for clothes, a new hunting rifle, fishing gear etc... I think we are very considerate of each other. We've endured quite a bit together and not all of it was pleasant like our cancer battles. I assure you that we appreciate each moment we have together. If you don't know or want that kind of commitment and love, that's okay, we all have the right to choose the life we live, with who or with nobody but trust me, it does exist. No bull.
I'm not saying we do everything together. He does golf without me...one example but for the most part we do things together and oddly enough so do the other couples we are friends with.
My husband and I spend very little time apart. When we first got married he even went to the grocery store with me and that continued but lately he has gone alone because of my back. He once told me if he wanted to spend time without me he wouldn't have gotten married. I feel very fortunate to have him, he's one in a million. I've read about some couples lately that died within minutes or hours from each other, I tend to think that will happen with us.
Just because it's not your choice doesn't make it wrong or unbearable. My husband has never been controlling, we just enjoy each others company and prefer to be together. And there are numerous cases where a spouse has died and the other passed SOON after so it's not bull. Hard as it might be for you to believe, true, unconditional love is rare in this day and age but it does exist. Another case was Debbie Reynolds. While it wasn't her spouse.....She loved her daughter so deeply she said she wanted to be with Carrie so she could take care of her, she passed one day after the death of her daughter, Carrie Fisher.
And I hate shopping, I especially hate shopping for clothes but on occasion my husband has sat while I tried something on and gladly I might add. I have done as much for him while he shopped for clothes, a new hunting rifle, fishing gear etc... I think we are very considerate of each other. We've endured quite a bit together and not all of it was pleasant like our cancer battles. I assure you that we appreciate each moment we have together. If you don't know or want that kind of commitment and love, that's okay, we all have the right to choose the life we live, with who or with nobody but trust me, it does exist. No bull.
I'm not saying we do everything together. He does golf without me...one example but for the most part we do things together and oddly enough so do the other couples we are friends with.
Reminds me of how women want their husbands to go shopping with them for everything, I can't imagine that in my life. Sit around near a dressing room while they try things on, good grief.
That is soooo true.....I rarely go clothes shopping, except maybe Kohl’s..
But my hubby sorta loves going to the grocery store...or esp Costco...problem is he wanders around and I lose him!
I find we are together...or at the same house..we have two...most of the time..I joke that he lives in the garage
..has a TV phone and internet there...
When we go to our desert home we always drive separately...he gets bored out there ...often he leaves earlier or comes later...
We are 75/79
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