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This thread is interesting as I have women friends who are divorced and widowed in their 50s and 60s. They have no interest in dating or getting married again. They love to travel, enjoy their families, have their own activities and homes. I had no idea senior online dating was so common!
I think people that have had good happy relationships in the past are much more likely to be looking for a companion. Seems pretty normal to me.
I love to travel. I adore my son but he lives 5 hours away. I have elderly parents, but the time I spend with them is just exhausting - not much about that is truly "enjoyable" now. I enjoy my siblings, but they are both many states away. I love being with someone that shares my love of fitness and being active, and music, and lots of others stuff. And of course...sex.
I asked one of my children why the site was called Plenty Offish and he said "Its Plenty of Fish..... but you have to throw most of them back"
Are you serious that you didn't know why it was called that? As in your Mom saying after somebody dumped you, "Don't worry, dear, there are plenty of fish in the sea"?
I went through the whole 8-million-page eHarmony application and at the end, they rejected me. I was in my early 50s but I probably didn't answer the religious questions to their liking. Glad I didn't pay them first!!
I have a few 70-something girlfriends (both widows) doing the OLD thing. One had a fling with a very nice-looking guy in his mid-60s but really, all he wanted was sex. Having only been with her husband her entire life, she was very much enjoying this hot sexy Italian guy, and we all knew he was just using her, but she had to find out for herself. Now she she's been in a relationship with another guy for almost a year....I wouldn't give this guy a second look plus he smokes, but she's happy with him, so that's all that matters.
The other girlfriend is very specific about what she's looking for -- he must excel at one of the hobbies she's into, so that's very limiting. I personally have my own past-time that I enjoy and it would also be hard to find a guy who's into it. I also don't want to be someone's caretaker. Two guys that were somewhat interested in me both are having serious medical issues now and, while I feel very bad for them, I did the caretaker thing for years with my Mom and just don't want to deal with it....plus I have enough issues of my own.
My mother wasn't right about much and almost never took her own advice about anything, but she was right about this: Live your life. Do things you enjoy. Join groups that do things you like to do or are about interests you have. It doesn't guarantee you'll meet someone, but if you do, it will be with far less humiliation. And if you don't, you just might find some new friends.
This reminds me of two recent marriages in my Congregational church. One, a long-divorced, early-retired teacher who then became our church administrator for many years. Very high energy woman, small wiry type. Nice lady. During this time, her early 20's daughter married the son of one church family. About eight years later, another older member (early 70s?), very nice man, lost this wife. About a year later, he and the church administrator married - this after her being divorced for at least 20 years. She appears very happy. They've been married about four years, now.
Another single, never married gal in her 50's, married a church widower a year or so after his wife died. The new wife had been friendly with the first wife, who I hear tell sort of arranged this marriage. I must say, the new marriage (also took place about four years ago) has been hard on the new wife - she's aged 20 years overnight, literally. It's shocking. I think the change from being single to marrying a man with kids and grandkids - plus selling two houses and buying another - took a lot out of her. She appears happy enough, but it's clearly a whole new, very busy world.
And, about 20 years ago, a new minister in our church who'd left the Benedictine Order eventually married a divorced church member with two grown sons. He now teaches theology and does interim pastoring at a nearby Episcopal Church. He was an intellectual, a true scholar with a very strong, basically Catholic faith, which shone through. We all loved him while he was with us. I think he left because our church was not "churchy" enough. The Catholics have more ritual and a more defined theology and he needed that.
So, our church is fairly fertile ground for some.
Last edited by Ariadne22; 07-01-2019 at 12:52 AM..
I do on line dating. I really think it's all about expectations.
I'm a widow, I had a wonderful, awesome marriage for 30 years, so my attitude is "don't press your luck". lol. I am not looking for another "soulmate".
I wouldn't mind a "sex toy". lol wink wink.
That being said, I enjoy meeting new people and going out on dates. Yep some of them have been very very interesting to say the least but for the most part they are fun. so for me the 40 bucks I spent on match.com for a 6 month subscription was worth it. (always wait for the 1/2 price sale.)
I've always wondered how folks get scammed, I am notoriously cheap and cynically. the nano second someone ask for money my attitude changes.
It isn't that a lot or even a good number or even a marginal number of women fall for scams on online dating sites.
It's just mentioning that one can see a good number of scammers who write to the online profiles of women trying to lay the groundwork to scam - and mentioning in this thread that this exists on the online dating sites.
It isn't that a lot or even a good number or even a marginal number of women fall for scams on online dating sites.
It's just mentioning that one can see a good number of scammers who write to the online profiles of women trying to lay the groundwork to scam - and mentioning in this thread that this exists on the online dating sites.
Right. They even try on Facebook. I get these friend requests from <unknown name> with a picture of a handsome older man with carefully styled hair that I guess I'm supposed to think is real and accept. I always wonder if there are women who fall for that.
Are you serious that you didn't know why it was called that? As in your Mom saying after somebody dumped you, "Don't worry, dear, there are plenty of fish in the sea"?
she said she thought it was called Plenty "Offish" - of fish as one word
Right. They even try on Facebook. I get these friend requests from <unknown name> with a picture of a handsome older man with carefully styled hair that I guess I'm supposed to think is real and accept. I always wonder if there are women who fall for that.
I do, too- started happening as soon as I changed my status from Married to Single 2 years after DH died. I had connected with the guy I was dating on FB so I thought it was time, but figured "Widowed" would make me a real target.
Yes, I got Friend Requests from nice-looking guys with brand-new profiles and no other friends. Two were military; I put their pictures in Google Images and found they were real military- except that there was an article about how the one had had many fraudulent profiles created with his picture (he was happily married) and I suspect the other had no idea he had a FB profile. Sad. I reported both.
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