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Old 06-27-2019, 08:21 PM
 
Location: Live in NY State, work in CT
9,026 posts, read 14,806,293 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
Your assumptions are erroneous. First, we are not a generation that "didn't use social networking and such...".

I've been using computers extensively for 30 years since 1989, and for tons of various uses, both personal and work.

And we're talking about online dating for older people and seniors, not your son and daughter in law who met online in their late twenties.

It depends on what we are talking about as "senior" here.

I am a couple of months shy of 52. I sent Internet emails as far back as 1985 and after graduating college in 1989 used computers extensively too. But I went to a college that was very "techy", I was one of the early "computer science" majors there, and this college had in a crude, internal "early adopter" kind of way many tech things that people take for granted today like online interactive gaming and even forums much like this, something that was mostly not true outside of the academic and military environments at that time. I often joke so ahead of the curve on all this that I was really meant to be born 20-30 years later, and truth be told, most people into this stuff at that time were "nerds" (yes, I pretty much was, I admit it ) and 20s and younger.

Since "senior" dating sites usually define it as 50 and up, if you are talking about people in their 50s, you are correct as I can say what you say of most if not all of my peers. Once you start getting north of 60, and certainly 65 (the more common definition of "senior"), which I thought this thread was more about, then I don't think it's so erroneous. I'm not saying that anyone over that age is a complete technophobe (my 75 year old mother and her 80 year old brother certainly are not), but I don't think it was so "ubiquetous" for them until recently.
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:31 PM
 
5,422 posts, read 3,440,673 times
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Many people who are currently in their early 70's have used computers extensively for 30+ years for both work and personal uses.

Erroneous assumptions and inaccuracies all over the place about this.

And the people currently in their early 70's who have used computers for 30+ years are not just computer science majors or nerds - they are people who worked in a vast array of professions and careers.

(I don't want to get off on this side topic except to correct the erroneous idea that seniors and older people have not been computer users for many decades at work, in their careers and professions, and in personal life and haven't done social networking on them)

(also age 50 is not a senior in today's world)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 7 Wishes View Post

Once you start getting north of 60, and certainly 65 (the more common definition of "senior"), which I thought this thread was more about, then I don't think it's so erroneous.
Your above statement is completely wrong. And don't judge everything on what your relatives happen to do or have done - there is a much wider world than your relatives.

Last edited by matisse12; 06-27-2019 at 08:51 PM..
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:33 PM
 
Location: Atlanta
318 posts, read 509,778 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johngolf View Post
I tried an over 50 dating site (at age 75) but the only responses I got were from women my own age which I am not interested in. The 50ish age women I contacted did not respond. I gave up after a few months.
Why would you think a 50ish woman would want a 75 year old geezer? I am 67 and would never consider anyone over 70.
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:36 PM
 
6,303 posts, read 5,042,575 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
Many people who are currently in their early 70's have used computers extensively for 30 years for both work and personal uses.

Erroneous assumptions and inaccuracies all over the place about this.

And the people currently in their early 70's who have used computers for 30+ years are not computer science majors or nerds - they are people working in a vast array of professions and careers.

(I don't want to get off on this side topic except to correct the idea that seniors and older people have not been computer users for decades at work and in personal life and haven't done social networking on them)

(also age 50 is not a senior in today's world)
I am shocked at my older friends and siblings that do not use computers

And i'm talking about a teacher's aide that ran a computer lab! And a sibling that worked as an executive assistant for many years. Used a computer at work, but somehow forgot all about it at home. I was shocked that she didn't know how to use powerpoint.

I took Fortran and Cobol back in the late 70s. We had to use punch cards and a card reader.

I think they are just afraid that they will break something. No curiosity about how things work.
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:37 PM
 
6,303 posts, read 5,042,575 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mirabella View Post
Why would you think a 50ish woman would want a 75 year old geezer? I am 67 and would never consider anyone over 70.
Exactly.

My roommate is 73 but i first met him when he told me he was 46!

They grow on you
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:40 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mirabella View Post

Why would you think a 50ish woman would want a 75 year old geezer? I am 67 and would never consider anyone over 70.
He figures maybe for financial favors and financial perks, and maybe lifestyle. As he has had such a set-up with a much younger woman.

A much older man than myself is not something I would want either and would not have wanted in the past - unless in the rare circumstance where the man is special in other ways, such as intelligence or interesting.

Last edited by matisse12; 06-27-2019 at 08:53 PM..
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Old 06-27-2019, 08:46 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
19,821 posts, read 18,826,487 times
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I wouldn't recommend it for people over age 65. I found my husband online but I was age 60 and he was 67 and living in the UK. It was an ordeal getting him here though Immigration, took years and loads of money. We wish we had found each other many years earlier.

I decided to look in the UK because the American men online were so obnoxious and just bragged about their money and their cars. Booooring. I'm not after their money. Who cares about their cars. They were full of themselves. At least the several British men I dated--and who came over here to meet me--were decent, polite, modest, kind, and we were compatible. One was going to buy me a ticket to come visit him but at the last minute he admitted that had lied about his age and was 75 instead of 65 but what a sweet, nice man. A 15 year age difference would have been too much. Another who did come over had been abused as a child and wasn't good at relationships, but he was wonderful and fun, and at least he confided in me and we said we would always be soulmates.

Of the British men I never met, a few kept in touch anyway by phone and email. They were all wonderful and kind, and would call to see how I was and to offer support because I was alone and newly divorced from a husband who had run off due to a complete mental breakdown and wanted no part of me.

The men online usually want a much younger woman. The woman online are often located in another country and just want a green card. That's what I'm hearing lately. One woman came over, got married and got the green card and one year later she called the police and said she was being abused. Her husband got thrown out of his own house. He divorced her--she was Russian and it's Russians who are trying to flee their countries. I know one guy now who is being pursued by a 20 year old Russian girl--he has no money to pay for a green card so the joke is on HER.

Of course, there's always the Nigerian prince scam, lol. They will send you their multi millions if you will just give them your bank account number!
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Old 06-27-2019, 09:02 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in northern Alabama
17,846 posts, read 54,109,596 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
I was with a group of other retired people today (a widow/widower support group so we are all single now) and we started talking about online dating. Most of us are in our mid 60s to late 70s. One woman tried on line dating (two different companies) and the first three men were all scammers. Another woman went on dates with two different men and they both were on the sex offender registry. Several other people had other horror stories about their senior citizen friends who tried on line dating.

So many younger people find a match through on line dating, or at least have OK experiences, is it really that different for senior citizens? Or did the people in my group (and their friends) just have unusually bad experiences?
Frogs - princes. I was going to link a youtube video of the male experience, but it has been taken down. Online dating is all about vetting. If you don't know how to ask the right questions, you will have bad experiences. That isn't a problem with the companies. It isn't even a problem with the scammers. Anticipate that MAYBE one in on hundred will be a potential date, and be willing to wait, and it can work.
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Old 06-27-2019, 09:03 PM
 
Location: Idaho
4,619 posts, read 4,456,526 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Thank you everyone. I figured that people must be joking or exaggerating when I heard all those horrible stories about on line dating when you are over 65. I guess that they were not joking or exaggerating.
Uugh! The few ruin it for everyone. Just registered the other day on a site. A "ton" of interest in just two days, but I haven't paid anything so can't see any of the messages or who sent flirts. Guess I'll just have to take everything down and go crawl back into my hole. (It's not so cold in there now that it is summertime.)
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Old 06-27-2019, 09:08 PM
 
5,422 posts, read 3,440,673 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by harry chickpea View Post

Frogs - princes. I was going to link a youtube video of the male experience, but it has been taken down. Online dating is all about vetting. If you don't know how to ask the right questions, you will have bad experiences. That isn't a problem with the companies. It isn't even a problem with the scammers. Anticipate that MAYBE one in on hundred will be a potential date, and be willing to wait, and it can work.
I described it wrongly as 'bad experiences'. The OP used that terminology in her original post.

I didn't have any bad experiences.

What I found is way too many undesirables, and way too few desirables. Very slim pickings of desirables.

And also a depressing array of men who looked like criminals, ex-convicts, low-lifes, and uneducated people. (and sounded that way too in their profiles)

And that older men usually want women younger than their own age.

Last edited by matisse12; 06-27-2019 at 09:20 PM..
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