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Old 06-29-2019, 08:47 PM
 
6,946 posts, read 3,855,193 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbieHere View Post
Im both the big picture and the checklist in my household. Lol. He is everything else. Lately, he doesnt even like to drive, even though he still drives. He prefers that Id chauffeuring him around in my SUV, its like riding in a limo because I dont drive aggressively, smooth ride., while he watches the scenery.He doesnt like when the kids drive even. Even eating lobsters, I had to crack for him. Otherwise, hed just rather have fish and chips. He gets lazier in his old age.
Why wouldn't he? He has the help well trained.
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Old 06-29-2019, 09:02 PM
 
6,946 posts, read 3,855,193 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
I was talking about men with metal detectors who walk along beaches in Florida or other beaches in other states looking for nickels, dimes, and quarters.

I was NOT talking about men or history buffs who look for "civil war relics" (??) and NOT talking about men who use different types of metal detectors while scuba diving - neither of those is what I was referring to, and both of those are not the common inexpensive metal detector person.

I'm talking about the men who meander down beaches looking for nickels and dimes. Women rarely do this.

(at least they are getting a little exercise with the walks, although it's majorly just meandering)

If those men meandering down Florida beaches and other beaches in other states looking for nickels and dimes find it fun to look for dimes and quarters or an earring - then they are having fun.

I find ignorance on City-Data in other forms, not this opinion.



And why would you site to the rarest of occurrences above as an example - siting a very rare example does not make a case nor is it logical - this is as far from the average male metal detector person wandering down a Florida beach as possible.....with an inexpensive metal detector, NOT scuba diving, NOT looking for civil war relics, NOT having some sort of business.
Don't be so sure. I was on a small Caribbean island once that was visited by a small windjammer cruise ship. A female passenger from that boat came ashore with what looked to be a brand new metal detector and began searching for "treasure" in front of local beach bar. Her fellow shipmates said she had been doing it at every stop they made.

This time a local went to his car and came back with a handful of coins that he proceeded to drop by his feet and kick sand over right in front of her which she never saw. Dozens of people were entertained by the excitement of each new find.
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Old 06-30-2019, 04:40 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,191 posts, read 6,301,958 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kokonutty View Post
Why wouldn't he? He has the help well trained.
He trained me to be lazier too. It’s the co-dependent thing. He is lazier comparing to past performance, but he is still very helpful around the house. He does a lot of our household chores, plus he fixes everything in the house.
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Old 06-30-2019, 11:52 AM
 
6,838 posts, read 3,708,603 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jertheber View Post
It may be that your husband didn't do hard work for most of his career, a lot of retirees have come down to their newly settled existence and find the boredom to be oppressive. Those who really worked hard in some physical capacity seem to do the best at retirement, they are tired, sore, often sick, and welcome the luxury of boredom.

..
Or more likely as an engineer he did work very hard during his career. Mental work. And now his mind has nothing to do. It's like running a Indy car at 10,000 RPM and then popping into neutral and coasting while keeping the engine revving full speed. The engine has nothing to do and over revs itself.
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Old 06-30-2019, 01:35 PM
 
20,521 posts, read 16,599,446 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
Suggesting a trip was my response to, "It's too hot here and I'm bored!"

But sure, in retirement you can do anything or nothing. He just hasn't figured that out yet. There is a certain rigidity of thinking, possibly common among engineers, that is resistant to change.

We had a couple of guys come by with a truck this morning to pick up a treadmill I'd ordered on Amazon but no local company would install for me. I hated to return it. It's a really nice treadmill. One of the guys, when I told him we were retired, said, "Man, I'd be out there having fun all day every day!"

Was he ever a spontaneous type, or a travel bug type? I myself am not spontaneous in any way. I like things planned, I like to make sure I have all my things packed and everything in order. If my honey came home today and said "we were given a free trip to Paris, but we have to leave in an hour!" I'd say I'm not going, lol. I just feel anxious when I travel and my routines around it make me feel better.

But I'm also a homebody. I like it here, I like not having to go anywhere. Just saying, don't expect someone to be a different person in retirement than they were before.

Last edited by ocnjgirl; 06-30-2019 at 02:56 PM..
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Old 06-30-2019, 01:42 PM
 
Location: Wasilla, AK
7,233 posts, read 4,119,698 times
Reputation: 15545
Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
I was talking about men with metal detectors who walk along beaches in Florida or other beaches in other states looking for nickels, dimes, and quarters.

I was NOT talking about men or history buffs who look for "civil war relics" (??) and NOT talking about men who use different types of metal detectors while scuba diving - neither of those is what I was referring to, and both of those are not the common inexpensive metal detector person.

I'm talking about the men who meander down beaches looking for nickels and dimes. Women rarely do this.

(at least they are getting a little exercise with the walks, although it's majorly just meandering)

If those men meandering down Florida beaches and other beaches in other states looking for nickels and dimes find it fun to look for dimes and quarters or an earring - then they are having fun.

I find ignorance on City-Data in other forms, not this opinion.
When you're digging yourself into a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging. I'm a college-educated professional and I enjoy metal detecting. I'd even do it on the beach.
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Old 06-30-2019, 02:02 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,599 posts, read 19,931,965 times
Reputation: 45669
I dunno. I do all kinds of stuff for my husband that he could do himself, and he does the same for me. I guess it's a fine line.
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Old 06-30-2019, 02:33 PM
 
11,118 posts, read 8,523,617 times
Reputation: 28064
What is this thread about?
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Old 06-30-2019, 03:16 PM
 
6,946 posts, read 3,855,193 times
Reputation: 14761
Quote:
Originally Posted by charlygal View Post
What is this thread about?
Independence and the lack of same.
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Old 06-30-2019, 03:33 PM
 
448 posts, read 93,284 times
Reputation: 854
Quote:
Originally Posted by PAhippo View Post
and some people (like me) just don't like to travel. gasp. and posted on the retirement forum.


Don't care if it's for a weekend, a week, a season.
There's things to cure boredom to be done locally. even in a small population 2,300 +/- town.


sounds like he's one of us stay-at-homers.

Go alone.
Same here. I live in San Diego and there's plenty to do and see here. Dont feel the need to venture out further than I have to. A true nester that shares his small space with the cutest yorkie.
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