U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:14 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,056 posts, read 17,376,569 times
Reputation: 41514

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
Now we're both in our 60's, retired, but he's stuck in the Midwest (where he doesn't want to be) because of his wife's job. Sometimes there's unintended consequences.
My uncle retired ten years before his wife. They bought a small home in Florida where he lived most of the fall/winter/spring and his wife took as much vacation time as she could (which was a lot as she had worked there for decades) during that time to be with him in Florida. They spent the summers together in the Midwest. It worked out well for them.

Actually, I know several couples that did similar things.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:16 PM
 
Location: Location: Happy Place
3,697 posts, read 1,873,794 times
Reputation: 11339
Quote:
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
Now we're both in our 60's, retired, but he's stuck in the Midwest (where he doesn't want to be) because of his wife's job. Sometimes there's unintended consequences.
IDk, I am 10 years younger than my husband. He retired and I worked 10 years after that- he seemed ok with it. We relocated to my home state, I worked 2.5 more years, then I retired. We are both retired now and life is pretty darn good.

I do take care of him, he doesn't cook or drive, I take him to his doctor appointments, make his food, handle finances, clean house. He has it pretty easy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:32 PM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,622 posts, read 39,986,663 times
Reputation: 23780
Quote:
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
You've obviously never lived in the Midwest.

People in Northern Illinois would be happier in a Russian Gulag
This too can happen... (I know a LOT of people very happy with upper midwest, retired or working)

or

... I don't like 280 days / yr of overcast and drizzle, so... I'm gone a lot (as in today, last week... week before that...) 50+ trips (130+ flights) last yr AWAY. I have always enjoyed traveling, so it works out for now.

Double income would have made the travel budget a lot richer!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:32 PM
 
Location: Rust'n in Tustin
2,221 posts, read 2,400,308 times
Reputation: 3999
Hey, don't kill the messenger, I'm just telling you guys/gals what he told me. Many people in the Midwest want to escape the winters.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:33 PM
 
Location: SoCal
13,252 posts, read 6,345,210 times
Reputation: 9857
Not close to 10 years, but 8 years difference here. But thanks to my husband’s health insurance, I got to retire when he did. It was unintended consequences but good ones.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:40 PM
 
2,110 posts, read 722,454 times
Reputation: 5413
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chaofan View Post
In any event, the choice to be happy or miserable is still his.
I agree. I married for the second time when I was 50 and DH was 65. We moved from NJ to KS for my job almost immediately (that had been on the horizon; I'd been teleworking for the previous year till DS finished HS). He was in advertising so you can imagine what his job prospects were, especially since the small firm where he'd worked in NJ went belly-up. Because he'd taken care of people all his life (a daughter with asthma back when it required a lot of hospital stays, a financially clueless GF in a previous long-term relationship, his elderly mother), he hadn't been able to save much. He filed for SS and took over the domestic duties, joking that he'd been promoted to pool boy. I was making twice what he'd made. Our housing costs were less. I was racking up FF miles from business travel. All that, plus the lower COL meant that we could save for when I retired, fund DS' college and see the world, too.

He had a sweet deal being married to a woman with a good career when he retired and he knew it. It was wonderful for both of us. We'd been together nearly 20 years when he died in November, 2016.

There are worse retirement scenarios than being "stuck" somewhere with a wife who's got a good job.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 12:53 PM
 
8,204 posts, read 11,921,160 times
Reputation: 18020
Quote:
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
...I'm just telling you guys/gals what he told me.
Why?


Quote:
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
Hey, don't kill the messenger....
Is that an option? I bet if you started a poll, that would win.

This thread is almost as interesting as the thread you created to tell us guys/gals that you hate to tip.

Or almost as riveting as the thread you created to tell us guys/gals your PSA number.

As one of the mods wrote just before locking the aforementioned threads: "Maybe OP could start a blog, we do have that option on C-D."
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 01:16 PM
 
Location: Rust'n in Tustin
2,221 posts, read 2,400,308 times
Reputation: 3999
Since this is a discussion forum, if you don't like my threads, either ignore them or ignore me. Either one works for me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 01:20 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
7,692 posts, read 4,725,286 times
Reputation: 28181
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chaofan View Post
Unless his wife keeps him locked in a cage in the basement

Wait, is that an option? Must learn more about this. (And start digging a basement...)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-08-2019, 01:29 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,234 posts, read 32,187,063 times
Reputation: 19762
I moved from the midwest over 20 years ago to escape the nasty winters. It was a paradise here. Then, it slowly started to change and not for the better. The politics and expenses are the polar opposite from that time and yes, my wife's job is the anchor now. We have one more year to get my youngest out of school and she agreed to move then. I used to crow about the weather but even the last few years hasn't been a lot to crow about. Drizzle with cold and wind or hot as hell with raging wildfires.

We aren't sure where it just can't be here as I have a pension.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top