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Old 07-25-2019, 10:25 AM
Location: New Mexico
6,679 posts, read 3,721,206 times
Reputation: 12567


Originally Posted by Bungalove View Post
I will say that I've been profoundly betrayed by both individuals and organizations in my life, but the details of those betrayals are nobodys business but mine and the betrayers. I've survived the emotional and/or financial devastation they caused at the time and have chosen to create my future without those influences on my endeavors.
That, to me, sounds like a healthy approach. We grow from our experiences but the direction of our growth is a choice we make. Learn a lesson and move on. Putting your trust in someone carries a certain level of risk but it seems to work out for the best often enough or else we wouldn't do it at all. One would think that people who have assembled a long list of personal betrayals would not be willing to trust anyone but it looks like they still do in some cases. There are people who are predators who thrive on betraying the trust of others so we have to recognize that and make a judgment call based on our experiences.

Old 07-25-2019, 10:32 AM
Location: planet earth
5,021 posts, read 1,906,418 times
Reputation: 11067
The person who last betrayed my trust is a really "nice," upstanding person. I like and respect him. I think he was driven to betray me due to his own stress and overwhelm. The betrayal was an action - not so much a grave character defect. I think he was just saving himself at the cost of me at that point in time.

Per the Four Agreements: Nothing is personal.

It still hurt, though, cuz I liked him and trusted him.
Old 07-25-2019, 11:06 AM
Location: Fort Lauderdale, FL
662 posts, read 174,771 times
Reputation: 969
Used to be that people got together because they had things in common and wanted to have fun.

As I've gotten older I realize that people now just want to associate with those who can 'increase their personal wealth': meaning financially, politically, sexually, or socially.

I now refuse to play that game, and where I used to give people 'three strikes', I now give only one.
Old 07-25-2019, 11:15 AM
Location: Southern California
24,064 posts, read 8,403,795 times
Reputation: 15678
Originally Posted by ysr_racer View Post
My first ex wife tried to stab me with a pair of scissors, my second ex wife tried to run me over with a car. Meh, it happens.

Move on.
What was your part in those drastic actions by your x's....it takes 2 or more in each agreement.
Old 07-25-2019, 11:38 AM
4,355 posts, read 6,078,501 times
Reputation: 10483
To keep track of betrayals, to number them even, would be to victimize myself. People let people down. Move on.
Old 07-25-2019, 11:43 AM
Location: Boca Raton, FL
5,200 posts, read 8,723,157 times
Reputation: 6228
Default Kind of interesting....

In later life, maybe you regret certain things.

So, I googled this person that betrayed me - as a joke which was not funny and it was hurtful - I didn't know for months later - maybe 6 months - anyway, googled him - lives out of state (thank you God!) and he wrote a song a few years back asking for forgiveness.

Anyway, maybe it bothered him after all.

Feeling somewhat vindicated by that.
Old 07-25-2019, 12:25 PM
Location: Tennessee
23,777 posts, read 17,715,323 times
Reputation: 27827
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
Now those are betrayals - it stings when people you have trusted act in such ways.
What got me with the childhood friend was that most of what he stole were family heirloom type things with very little monetary value. A lot of that was never recovered.

He's always been the outwardly religious type too. We've crossed paths over the years, but it's never been more than a "hi" type of thing.
Old 07-25-2019, 12:32 PM
Location: planet earth
5,021 posts, read 1,906,418 times
Reputation: 11067
Originally Posted by seeriously View Post
To keep track of betrayals, to number them even, would be to victimize myself. People let people down. Move on.
Who are you talking to?

I am not numbering betrayals and as far as "moving on" is concerned, I think I'm doing pretty good as this only happened two days ago.

I posted then because I was curious if betrayal is as common as I have experienced in my life. That's the only reason I "guessed" at numbers.
Old 07-25-2019, 12:59 PM
Location: Living on the Coast in Oxnard CA
15,778 posts, read 26,856,400 times
Reputation: 20444
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
Since it just happened yesterday, I don't think anyone could say I am wallowing.

Your comments are rude.
Wow, ask for people to comment and then call them rude. How old are you?
Old 07-25-2019, 01:07 PM
Location: S.W. Florida
2,238 posts, read 947,528 times
Reputation: 6300
Too many to list here and I am definitely not in the sensitive category. Ex wife, kids, coworker. Itís all part of life. Either roll with it and move forward or let it destroy you. I choose to keep moving forward.
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