U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 07-24-2019, 01:06 PM
 
Location: Arizona
190 posts, read 114,505 times
Reputation: 755

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
There is a theory about "black sheep" - people who are scapegoated - they are run-out-of-town (the image of the black sheep) because they hold awareness that the group does not want to deal with. It's a very interesting phenomenon.
Prefacing with this is not a put down, I don't care if you posted the OT in the retirement forum and I'm sorry you were betrayed by a trusted friend...but...

There is much more to the black sheep phenomenon than you've written. As interesting as it is, (it being the Black Sheep Phenomenon )it probably belongs in the Psychology forum.

 
Old 07-24-2019, 01:18 PM
 
Location: Central NY
4,706 posts, read 3,274,740 times
Reputation: 12100
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
So because you don't like this thread - have no interest in adding to it in any productive way - it should be shut down to placate you?

If I had the energy, I would seek out all of your boring threads and bust in and say they should be shut down because I don't like them - lol



Your problem of being betrayed is one that none of us are able or willing to address.
Reading this particular post of yours, you remind me too much of people I am so glad are no longer in my life. When we become adults (I am assuming you are one?), we learn to blow off stuff like that and chalk it up to one more lesson in life. Which is exactly what you have become to me.

We all go through things and hanging on to all the hurts we have experienced is a choice we make (or not). Some of us enjoy wallowing in it. It sounds like you could be one of them.

You admit to being "sensitive". Have you considered talking to someone who can really help you? It's apparent that if anyone attempts to help you and it's something you do not like you lash out and want to hurt whoever "betrayed" you.

Get over yourself. It's a miserable life when you hang onto this kind of crap.
 
Old 07-24-2019, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Living on the Coast in Oxnard CA
15,778 posts, read 26,851,431 times
Reputation: 20440
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
I am astounded every time someone asks for definitions of common words. I am pretty sure you know what the word means. If, by some strange fluke, you don't (and that would be REALLY WEIRD), then you can always google the dictionary definitions.

Here is more of a discussion of examples of betrayal:

https://www.excelatlife.com/articles/betrayed.htm
The question is legitimate. Your very definition explains that something extremely terrible happened that caused you to lose trust in a person. While everyone has problems in life not everyone feels betrayed by the same problem.

Not too long ago my sister in law called looking for my wife. She had an earth shattering problem that she had to talk to my wife about. Her entire world was in peril. My wife had left her phone in the truck while I waited for her. My 12 year old daughter heard the conversation over the trucks sound system. After the call My daughter was concerned for her aunts problems, which she had not told us what they were.

Later my wife told me she called her and found out something happened to her sister at work and it was a big problem for her. It was a problem that my wife and I would not have concerned ourselves about, but to my sister in law, it was big time drama.

For me about the only thing that I would have a problem with is if my investments were placed in a Ponzi Scheme of some kind and I lost money. If I trust my financial planner with my money and it is invested in something that will cause me to lose all of my money then I would feel betrayed.

I would feel hurt if my wife decided to have a friend on the side.

Other than that, I don't know of anything that would bother me too much. Most things that people seem to concern themselves with are so insignificant that I can not see what all the fuss is.
 
Old 07-24-2019, 01:38 PM
 
Location: Idaho
1,459 posts, read 1,163,105 times
Reputation: 5585
Yes, I have been betrayed since I am not perfect and my life is not perfect.

Most of the betrayals which I have suffered occur AFTER I have joined the retired elders club.

Below are some of the most recent betrayals.

Few days ago, my memory betrayed me when I tried to navigate from the dim living room to my bedroom. I forgot that we have a floating fireplace in the path and banged my shin against the hearth stone slab.

Last Monday was the worst! While removing weeds on a steep hill in preparation for a new lawn, I suffered two terrible acts of betrayals! My arm betrayed me by slamming the rake hard against my leg. Then my foot betrayed me by not moving fast enough out of the way of a swinging shovel. I got a bruised ankle just below my bruised calf.

The ultimate act of betrayal was committed by my husband later that day. I decided to go soaking in the hot tub to soothe the bruises and found the stepping platform was too far away. My husband told me that he had moved it out to change the filter. He proceeded to bring it close to the hot tub and dropped it on my toes! Geez! he must have tried to get even with me for not letting him having another serving of ice cream!

Gosh, I don't know how long I will last with these frequent betrayal acts of my mind and body - with my husband as an accomplice!
 
Old 07-24-2019, 01:57 PM
 
Location: Willamette Valley, Oregon
4,074 posts, read 1,139,918 times
Reputation: 5776
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
Wow. Did she literally "burn" plastic? Toxic!

What was depicted on that cover that so offended her?

I hope I did this right.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Free_(...albumcover.jpg
 
Old 07-24-2019, 02:33 PM
 
Location: Willamette Valley, Oregon
4,074 posts, read 1,139,918 times
Reputation: 5776
Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaDL View Post
Yes, I have been betrayed since I am not perfect and my life is not perfect.

Most of the betrayals which I have suffered occur AFTER I have joined the retired elders club.

Below are some of the most recent betrayals.

Few days ago, my memory betrayed me when I tried to navigate from the dim living room to my bedroom. I forgot that we have a floating fireplace in the path and banged my shin against the hearth stone slab.

Last Monday was the worst! While removing weeds on a steep hill in preparation for a new lawn, I suffered two terrible acts of betrayals! My arm betrayed me by slamming the rake hard against my leg. Then my foot betrayed me by not moving fast enough out of the way of a swinging shovel. I got a bruised ankle just below my bruised calf.

The ultimate act of betrayal was committed by my husband later that day. I decided to go soaking in the hot tub to soothe the bruises and found the stepping platform was too far away. My husband told me that he had moved it out to change the filter. He proceeded to bring it close to the hot tub and dropped it on my toes! Geez! he must have tried to get even with me for not letting him having another serving of ice cream!

Gosh, I don't know how long I will last with these frequent betrayal acts of my mind and body - with my husband as an accomplice!

OMG! If we are talking about memory betrayal, I'm right there with you. I've been driving to a certain music store for at least 10 years, probably more. I should be able to navigate there with ease. A week ago I spent at least an hour wandering around west Eugene, until I remembered to get on I-5 north and then take Belt line west for about 5 minutes. I've never been good at directions, but this was horrifying! Fortunately I have a spouse who has wonderful memory capacity. I'll just let her drive!
 
Old 07-24-2019, 02:40 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,769 posts, read 17,704,665 times
Reputation: 27824
Truly betrayed?

When I was a kid, one of the neighborhood kids that always hung at my office stole a bunch of money and collectibles from me. We got some of the things back, but a lot of the things were never seen again. I never trusted him again.

When I was 21, my first real girlfriend dumped me with no notice or warning and was cheating on me. That was bad.

I had a contract job back in 2013 where the manager was really nice to me and we went back a few years professionally. He called the contracting agency, and fired me with no notice.
 
Old 07-24-2019, 03:03 PM
 
Location: Virginia
4,008 posts, read 2,064,357 times
Reputation: 11075
I will say that I've been profoundly betrayed by both individuals and organizations in my life, but the details of those betrayals are nobodys business but mine and the betrayers. I've survived the emotional and/or financial devastation they caused at the time and have chosen to create my future without those influences on my endeavors.
 
Old 07-24-2019, 03:06 PM
 
Location: planet earth
5,018 posts, read 1,906,418 times
Reputation: 11064
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sibay View Post
Prefacing with this is not a put down, I don't care if you posted the OT in the retirement forum and I'm sorry you were betrayed by a trusted friend...but...

There is much more to the black sheep phenomenon than you've written. As interesting as it is, (it being the Black Sheep Phenomenon )it probably belongs in the Psychology forum.
Yes. It was just a side comment about something I observed here.

Threads don't always go in straight, linear fashion - just like normal conversations.
 
Old 07-24-2019, 03:09 PM
 
Location: planet earth
5,018 posts, read 1,906,418 times
Reputation: 11064
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYgal1542 View Post
Your problem of being betrayed is one that none of us are able or willing to address.
Reading this particular post of yours, you remind me too much of people I am so glad are no longer in my life. When we become adults (I am assuming you are one?), we learn to blow off stuff like that and chalk it up to one more lesson in life. Which is exactly what you have become to me.

We all go through things and hanging on to all the hurts we have experienced is a choice we make (or not). Some of us enjoy wallowing in it. It sounds like you could be one of them.

You admit to being "sensitive". Have you considered talking to someone who can really help you? It's apparent that if anyone attempts to help you and it's something you do not like you lash out and want to hurt whoever "betrayed" you.

Get over yourself. It's a miserable life when you hang onto this kind of crap.
Since it just happened yesterday, I don't think anyone could say I am wallowing.

Your comments are rude.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Closed Thread


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top