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Old 07-31-2019, 07:02 AM
 
284 posts, read 110,992 times
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DH and I both ended up retiring due to health issues. This was not what we had planned when we moved from NY to TX. Fortunately, we both qualified for SSDI, so financially we are OK.


Five years ago we never expected to be where we are today. Where we are is fine, it's just not where we thought we'd be.
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Old 07-31-2019, 07:24 AM
 
Location: Port Charlotte FL
1,084 posts, read 644,378 times
Reputation: 3167
almost all of my old friends are dead..I'm 71 and talking about friends made in my 20's and 30's..shared experiences with newer friends just ain't the same..
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Old 07-31-2019, 07:26 AM
 
1,212 posts, read 678,533 times
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We are in the lucky category so far, but both of our best friends lost their spouses. It was a big shock as they were in their 60s and had plannned on happy retirements.

So now we are in the “why wait” mode. We plan 2-3 trips a year which is enough for us, as our tolerance for flying or long distance driving is fading. We are grateful we traveled frequently throughout the years and enjoyed a lifetime of memories instead of holding off until the “dream” retirement. Shorter trips are becoming more appealing.

I have great respect for those who have gone through such major issues. It can happen so quickly and your life is completely altered. The tax changes for single adults is an eye-opener, too.
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Old 07-31-2019, 07:44 AM
 
2,314 posts, read 801,989 times
Reputation: 5913
Quote:
Originally Posted by HollyhockGarden View Post
So, if I do outlive him, I will continue to receive the lower pension amount the rest of my life. Luck of the draw, I guess. But I, like millions of married women these days, was a full-time working spouse, so I will not receive any Survivor SS benefits, only my own check. There are no survivor benefits for spouses if their own SS check is equal to or more than the spouse that died, as far as I know.
I'd thought that, too, but DH died when I was 64 and I hadn't filed for benefits on my own record (worked 38 years, the last 20+ over the SS max, retired at 61). I'm now getting Survivor benefits and waiting till 70 to collect my own, which will be about $1,500/month higher.
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Old 07-31-2019, 07:49 AM
 
Location: The Outer Limits
1,488 posts, read 1,840,373 times
Reputation: 2475
Getting old, time flys by.
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Old 07-31-2019, 08:07 AM
Status: "Life is good." (set 10 days ago)
 
Location: Colorado
47 posts, read 10,024 times
Reputation: 242
I know that I am preaching to the choir but you have to run the numbers before you retire and see how much money your spouse will have when you leave this earth. For example, if that means I can't retire at 62 and have to work a few extra years (if you are able), so be it.
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Old 07-31-2019, 08:20 AM
 
2,314 posts, read 801,989 times
Reputation: 5913
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deoge View Post
I know that I am preaching to the choir but you have to run the numbers before you retire and see how much money your spouse will have when you leave this earth. For example, if that means I can't retire at 62 and have to work a few extra years (if you are able), so be it.
Oh, I know- after DH died I was on a Board of widows and widowers and many had to sell the house after losing their spouse because they couldn't afford to keep it up. Just yesterday I attended the funeral of the husband of a friend- he was 80, she's around the same age. She'd told me years ago that they'd had their "dream trip" to Greece after they both retired and spent down most of their retirement savings but were doing OK on SS. Last I heard, her car was having problems but she couldn't afford to get it fixed yet. And now the household SS will decrease by 1/3. Another friend, age 64 and working at a very modest job, went through a health scare with her husband and he decided to stop working (desk job and I'm not sure if he was really incapable of resuming it). He decided that they could make a go of it if they both started SS and she continues to work. He spends a lot of money on his hobbies and is very secretive about the accounts in his name, including what he owes on his credit cards. And now both he and she have permanent reductions in SS because they filed before FRA and her Survivor benefits will be affected if he goes first.

I'm happy to see someone of either sex keeping mind the long-term needs of their spouse.
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Old 07-31-2019, 08:29 AM
 
Location: USA
305 posts, read 90,939 times
Reputation: 1289
Semi-retired, as is DH. The worst thing that's happened so far is facing cancer with a friend who has been recently diagnosed. His spouse is also struggling with a medical condition.

It seems that, as we age, when one condition clears up or is in remission, another one crops up. It's like a game of whack-a-mole.

We are grateful, however, for excellent medical care and the hope that we have many years together. But we may not; who knows?

With more years in the used column than the available column, it puts things in perspective, and we plan accordingly.
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Old 07-31-2019, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
5,898 posts, read 4,910,471 times
Reputation: 19876
With some pensions you can change the option with a change in circumstances, even if they say your choice is "irrevocable". If you select say the 50% spouse survivor option, and they reduce your pension accordingly, then that spouse dies before the pensioner, the pensioner can apply to have that changed and you might even receive a refund of all the withheld money. I have also seen a provision to change the pension if you had no spouse when you elected no survivor, but got married later.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about for CalPERS retirees:
https://www.calpers.ca.gov/docs/form...retirement.pdf
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Old 07-31-2019, 08:49 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,202 posts, read 17,534,098 times
Reputation: 42031
Quote:
Originally Posted by MadManofBethesda View Post
And did you provide for a survivor benefit for your spouse? Because everything you've written would still be true and you would have had the illusion of choice. A spouse's signature is only required on your pension paperwork if you want to reduce or waive the survivor pension.
Yes, I selected survivor benefit for my spouse.

Thank you for the added information.
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