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Old 08-02-2019, 09:16 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,847 posts, read 17,764,696 times
Reputation: 27898

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I'd give a B+ to A-.

We moved around a bit until I was in my early teens. South Carolina and back - numerous local addresses. Parents finally settled down and bought a house when I was 12.

We were working to middle class. I had all I needed and some extra.

I would have done things differently. They did things career-wise that were dumb or shortsighted in hindsight. The house I grew up in, and the house they live in now, was older and needed a lot of work. They never really got the work done. I don't know why they were so averse to sending me to city schools, which were much better than the county schools I attended.
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Old 08-02-2019, 01:04 PM
 
Location: Virginia
176 posts, read 110,240 times
Reputation: 518
My dad was a blue collar worker who became an alcoholic. There were 5 of us kids with a good age gap between all of us. Dad did not always work and would gamble or drink his pay check away often. He had a decent job, but we lacked money because he would lay out of work. Alcoholism is a terrible disease. However, I had very loving, kind parents and siblings. My dad was never angry or abusive. He just didn't always go to work. He loved animals, nature and the outdoors and I thank him for my love of that. We couldn't afford vacations so it was trips to the country to see my grandparents. I had tons of cousins, aunts and uncles on mom and dad's side of the family. We spent Sundays visiting relatives and playing with cousins. All holidays were spent with the families. Even though we did not have much our house was full of love and Christmas always seemed magical. We all grew up to be productive, responsible adults and have families of our own. My parents finally divorced when I was 15 and by the time I was 20 dad had drank himself to death. All of the neighborhood kids did not have much either and we played together all summer long, walked to school together and created some great memories. I begin babysitting by age 12 and working as soon as I turned 16 to pay for my clothes, spending money, and hanging out with my friends. Overall, I have some great memories of my childhood, but wish I could erase the hardships and burden faced by mom because of my dad's drinking.
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Old 08-02-2019, 01:15 PM
 
Location: equator
3,572 posts, read 1,581,952 times
Reputation: 8894
Pretty idyllic in the orange groves of SoCal. I had a pony and we'd gallop up and down the Santa Ana river bed, then later riding in the hills above Orange. No parents knew where we were: riding our bikes to the library or friends' houses. My dad put grandparents in a house nearby with a pool we frequented.

We got to go to Disneyland and take a day off school for our birthdays. Back then, it wasn't crowded and tickets were like $12, LOL.

Our extended family was very close and we had a summer home in rural MN where we'd all get together.

We were very respectful though---no talking back or yelling. Church 3 times a week. Nobody smoked, drank or swore; nobody argued. 52 cousins we grew up with.
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Old 08-02-2019, 01:32 PM
 
Location: Illinois
26 posts, read 5,076 times
Reputation: 17
I had a good childhood, 2 parent home, I was the youngest of 6 and due to our age differences was the only kid at home by the time I was 10. I was spoiled but not materially, I had family all over the country so was able to travel a lot during the summer and get to experience life all over the country. I had dogs, played sports, went to church, went to summer camp, had a solid group of friends and aside from really disliking school I can't complain.
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Old 08-02-2019, 01:42 PM
 
14,126 posts, read 7,540,918 times
Reputation: 25848
Mine was kind-a the same as now. My house is a couple hundred yards from where I used to walk to first and 2nd grade.



Same harbor but the boat is fiberglass instead of wood. My boat winters in the same boat yard.




I ski all winter but the equipment is a lot better and I don't use child labor to tune my skis



The car is a lot more reliable and doesn't have tail fins



Same beach. The bicycle is a lot better.
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Old 08-02-2019, 01:43 PM
 
Location: Columbia SC
9,067 posts, read 7,834,628 times
Reputation: 12378
I had an average, good upbringing. Usual ups and downs but nothing earth shaking. My father was 40 when I was born. He was not a real participator in my day to day life. He was aloof but not mean or cruel in anyway.

When I got out of the US Navy at age 24, we began to spend more time together. I was learning about him as a man and I liked what I saw. We had our political differences but nothing damaging. He died two years later and I am sorry we did not get to spend more time together.
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Old 08-02-2019, 02:20 PM
 
5,296 posts, read 1,317,748 times
Reputation: 4110
Quote:
Originally Posted by k7baixo View Post
Blessed.

We had two parents who loved us but kept us disciplined. We had the run of the county where we lived, able to walk or ride our bikes as far as we wanted as long as we were home for supper. We had neighbors who kept an eye out for us and didn't hesitate to talk to our parents if we were misbehaving. The country was "dry" so drinking didn't intrude too much.

I learned the value of hard work early. My mom rewarded me for extra chores that I did and I got my first job at 13. Our parents never overindulged us - I'd say that we were lower-middle-class. I always thought it was unfair to expect them to pay for my college knowing that they were saving for retirement so I used the military to earn the GI Bill.

We went to church every Sunday even if we didn't want to. My father loved to travel and by the time I was 17, we had traveled as far south as Key West, as far north as the north side of Lake Superior, as far east as the Outer Bank of NC and as far west as Utah... all done while pulling a tent trailer that my father built from scratch.

Even when our little home town was destroyed by a tornado when I was 15, we never lost hope or felt sorry for ourselves. Within hours, my brother and I were working with a guy on a bulldozer trying to clear the roads to our little country hospital so those injured could receive care. It was dark, there was no electricity but it's amazing what a couple of guys with flashlights and a bulldozer can accomplish. lol

This was the beginning of segregation but we never had any issues. Believe it or not, it was sports that united blacks and whites and it was Charles Cleveland who taught us grace and humility. My God... it could have gone so wrong but it didn't... it went so right. Read the article that I linked. It's worth your time.
Thanks for sharing. Some of the comments have some amazing stories.
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Old 08-02-2019, 02:29 PM
 
1,734 posts, read 610,614 times
Reputation: 3241
Something I probably should have included in my original reply was that my mom, at least, was older than the average when she had me; she was 35. My dad, being six years younger than she, was 29. So in an era when most women were having first babies at 25 or so (based on historical averages) she was a decade older than the norm. She did not intend to have any children but she felt pushed into having just one. Which was fine with me, I never wanted siblings anyhow, LOL

Part of that was because she'd been married before, at age 25, and it ended in divorce less than four years later. She came home early and found him in their apartment with another woman and that was it for her. No second chances, she was capital-D done. Didn't even ask for alimony, all she wanted was him out of her life, bada boom bada bing! Took only her clothes from the apartment and nothing else. She never really trusted men after that and her assumption was that "they will all cheat if they can, no matter who they are." Very pessimistic nature with a huge helping of hypochondria as she moved into her forties and beyond. My dad was the opposite, very positive and gregarious.
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Old 08-02-2019, 02:44 PM
 
5,296 posts, read 1,317,748 times
Reputation: 4110
I would say mixed. Parents were both spoiled only children, so no extended family. Grandparents were very involved so that was good. Parents separated by the time I, the 3rd child, was 8. Mom was bipolar and hospitalized several times. I thought it started when I was 8 or 9 but I found an old newspaper article online from my hometown a few years ago where they would put hospital admissions in the newspaper. She was admitted when I was 3. As a kid, I thought it was my fault.

Dad was a womanizer and it was a small town so it was known around town. My parents were probably the first of that era to split up in our town so I felt a stigma about it all. I was shy and didn't have a lot of friends. Mostly played with the neighborhood kids. But summers were fun...going to the pool, reading Archie comics, riding bikes to the local ice cream shop.

After the separation, my mom started drinking more and more. From about 11 on, I kind of raised myself. My sisters had gone off to college. My mom made me get a job to pay for my car insurance and I got a job as a cashier in a grocery store, which was a lot of fun and I made good money because we had to join a union. I loved that job. I bought most of my own food and clothes at that point. My mom was done parenting and my dad was always too busy golfing or with whoever he happened to be dating/married to at the time to bother much except to criticize and lecture me. I look back now and pretty much figure they were human and did the best they could. I was lucky that his parents really stepped up the plate. I credit them being there with me surviving all that drama with my mom and dad.
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Old 08-02-2019, 02:58 PM
 
Location: Southern California
24,181 posts, read 8,456,688 times
Reputation: 15741
Quote:
Originally Posted by marid4061 View Post
My dad was a blue collar worker who became an alcoholic. There were 5 of us kids with a good age gap between all of us. Dad did not always work and would gamble or drink his pay check away often. He had a decent job, but we lacked money because he would lay out of work. Alcoholism is a terrible disease. However, I had very loving, kind parents and siblings. My dad was never angry or abusive. He just didn't always go to work. He loved animals, nature and the outdoors and I thank him for my love of that. We couldn't afford vacations so it was trips to the country to see my grandparents. I had tons of cousins, aunts and uncles on mom and dad's side of the family. We spent Sundays visiting relatives and playing with cousins. All holidays were spent with the families. Even though we did not have much our house was full of love and Christmas always seemed magical. We all grew up to be productive, responsible adults and have families of our own. My parents finally divorced when I was 15 and by the time I was 20 dad had drank himself to death. All of the neighborhood kids did not have much either and we played together all summer long, walked to school together and created some great memories. I begin babysitting by age 12 and working as soon as I turned 16 to pay for my clothes, spending money, and hanging out with my friends. Overall, I have some great memories of my childhood, but wish I could erase the hardships and burden faced by mom because of my dad's drinking.
You can't erase what your mom went thru, mine did as well. And she stayed and prayed and made her life to 91. It was what it was and don't beat yourself up and Wish ....

My ex was alcholic and we ended up in divorce, my daughter's husband was alcholic and they ended up in divorce...different lives but all married alcoholics....what do you know....
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