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Old 08-15-2019, 05:38 PM
126 posts, read 48,408 times
Reputation: 281


I had a good or great relationship with most of the people I worked for - and there were quite a few over the years. I am also a believer of not burning bridges and was blessed to be able to walk back over them twice, which ultimately quadrupled my pension. I was recruited for my last job. Long story short, I gave my boss, with whom I thought I had a good relationship, the advantage of knowing my timetable for retiring and moving to another state. I thought we had an arrangement that I'd WFH through the year and into next and possibly indefinitely. He then reneged and more or less wanted me to give him an exit date, despite the fact my local house wasn't even on the market, which meant that after giving him every advantage of advance knowledge, he was going to use it to push me out the door on his timetable. I'd been prepared to walk away into retirement, but since he'd suggested the WFH arrangement, had begun to plan on this - so I felt betrayed, but understood he's one of those people that will treat you badly once you have limited or no use to him or his future.

Did I tell him off or let him know what I thought of him as I left? Nope. What I did do was tell everyone the honest story of what had happened - from my perspective (so they would know not to trust him). I also decided that instead of letting him know when the house sold, which would give him 4-6 weeks to work toward finding a replacement (provided my house sold before my expiration date arrived), I would give him only the two week notice of resignation that is the professional standard. My house sold in 2 days and I actually couldn't have given him 4-6 weeks notice if I'd wanted because the buyers wanted a fast settlement, so he got 2 weeks (and I lived in a house with an air mattress and 2 folding chairs for a week in order to give him that much). I'm hearing he's having problems finding qualified candidates. My wish is that it takes a very long time before there is someone sitting in my former chair, all the while I could have/would have WFH during this time. I figure being a decent person and being able to live with yourself is the best revenge you can get. Karma will do the rest for you.
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Old 08-15-2019, 06:19 PM
651 posts, read 544,458 times
Reputation: 906
Originally Posted by jaminhealth View Post
I did more than tell anyone off, I filed a age discrimination lawsuit and won a money award. It was good to have a son in law and former bf (attorney) helping me out. That was a rough time in my life and I believe being let go, pushed me into fibromyalgia.
Good for you. That kind of discrimination case is very hard to prove and win.

Curious, did EEOC sue them on your behalf or did you win through a civil case?
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Old 08-15-2019, 06:58 PM
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
8,095 posts, read 4,955,028 times
Reputation: 29594
My last job.

We had a weak manager. One of the leads was making a power play and gradually bringing family members into our group, which the manager did nothing to thwart. I could see this lead would eventually be managing me, one way or another, most likely managing me right out of a job and I didn't want to stick around for that. Plus I had plans elsewhere for the future.

There was another company where some former members of our group were working. I called one of them and said I'd given my notice "because the alternative is marrying into Mr. Lead's family!"

I'm told this comment was repeated among my ex-coworkers with a great deal of hilarity. They all knew exactly what I meant, as to a person they felt Mr. Lead had gotten much too big for his britches.

But did I tell off management? Nope. I was a contractor and I had zero power.
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Old 08-15-2019, 06:59 PM
Location: Southern California
24,507 posts, read 8,590,084 times
Reputation: 15969
Originally Posted by lovnova View Post
good for you. That kind of discrimination case is very hard to prove and win.

Curious, did eeoc sue them on your behalf or did you win through a civil case?
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Old 08-15-2019, 07:18 PM
3,988 posts, read 1,558,817 times
Reputation: 7877
not retiring...quitting.
did not help me, but
hurt those in my
it was a lesson learned.
no matter how much it was deserved,
it was and is not All About Me.
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Old 08-15-2019, 08:21 PM
Location: SoCal
5,029 posts, read 8,847,756 times
Reputation: 3843
You don't have to retire because of a crappy boss. You can have crappy boss all through out your career.

I don't believe in telling them off. I believe the best revenge is to living well. Enjoy my life and be successful despite some crappy bosses were in my path making my life difficult.

This happened earlier in my career, my crappy boss was so terrible that he arranged it so I was laid off. Well, it so happens I was hired by this company's customer. Imagine their shock when they saw me in a meeting and realized that I would be their customer's representative and had influence on decisions made!

Well, the ex-crappy boss ran after me and apologized profusely after the meeting for the way he treated me. I knew it was not sincere but at this time, I didn't really care. I had a good job and living well. It really doesn't matter how they ass-kissed me because I was the customer.
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Old 08-15-2019, 09:47 PM
Location: Location: Happy Place
3,744 posts, read 1,917,111 times
Reputation: 11525
I didn't tell anyone off. I did refuse any sort of party or gathering, telling my boss I would walk out and never return. So we had a private certificate thing on my last day.

I told my boss all I wanted was for NO one to get between me and the door.....
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Old 08-15-2019, 10:35 PM
Location: Middle Tennessee
3,759 posts, read 2,270,514 times
Reputation: 5381
Three of of old timers retired on the same day. Upper management was on a push to change a smooth functioning team. They were more interested in "yes" people rather than people who knew what they were doing. Our manager talked with several of us and said that it was in our best interest to retire if we could (soon after we left he took a demotion to go to another department). I really felt sorry for a couple of people who were just not in a financial position to do what the three of us did as their life was made miserable in an effort to push them out.

The three of us decided that on our exit reviews, we would tell our true feelings. No getting nasty, just how we felt about the changes that had been happening in the past year. The director we met with was someone that I had known and worked with for many years. I actually liked her when she was a regular rep like me, but something happened when she got on the fast track. She became really controlling and seemed to think that fear was the best way to manage. My heart sank when she was named to head our department a year before I left. My meeting with her went pretty well; not that anything I said was going to change things for those who remained. I just felt better about getting it off of my chest.
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Old 08-15-2019, 11:08 PM
Location: New Mexico
6,859 posts, read 3,793,444 times
Reputation: 12934
I've heard people say they would. I've never had an exit interview where critical comments could go on record. I actually don't think my boss needed me to tell her off. I suspect she was a bit unstable by the time I left due to personal losses as much as work stress and there was a measure of paranoia going on based on some of her comments. She imagined she had no allies or loyal staff. She chose not to attend my retirement. I liked her as a person (more than she assumed) and would have wished her well.

As I was retiring her deputy tried to hire me as a contract consultant but that fell through when he had a heart attack from the stress of working with her. I would not have agreed anyway.
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Old 08-16-2019, 03:03 AM
12,959 posts, read 14,242,403 times
Reputation: 35602
Originally Posted by katharsis View Post
I often hear of people who said that they will, or might, do that, but I am just curious how many of you actually did.

It could be a customer, boss, or co-worker (or more than one), but I would like to hear your stories.
Nope, and I certainly had good reason. But I was going forward, not stuck in the mud.
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