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Old 09-02-2019, 03:21 PM
 
4,166 posts, read 7,894,554 times
Reputation: 5843

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The quick google of "best countries for elderly care" yielded these results: the USA is in the top ten.

https://www.cbsnews.com/media/the-10...eople-over-60/

https://qz.com/1391824/norway-sweden...r-the-elderly/

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-s...-a7860786.html
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Old 09-02-2019, 03:23 PM
 
Location: SoCal
13,990 posts, read 6,692,201 times
Reputation: 10641
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nik4me View Post
Sorry, did not mean to offend you. I understand, that you went through a lot!
It is unfortunate in the US, that last years of life can economically devastate you.
It is unheard of in Europe. They donít believe me ( when I am describing our laws and medical care) that our ďprosperousĒ country does it to its citizens...
Most people in Europe are not super obese either. We have a food problem in this country.
With that said, both of my kids like to live in Europe, their friends from college and high school are there, UK, Sweden, Germany. My husband and I might be there in our old age. Come to think about it, I like the convenience of the bus and train system. Also in UK, they like to keep people at home as much as possible. She only spent £60 per day for care. Thatís the price she paid for somebody to pop in for 30 minutes to make sure she took her medicine and heat up food for her. This helper also helped her buying ready made meals from the supermarket. Thatís seem like a good compromise then the system in America.
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Old 09-02-2019, 03:24 PM
 
7,271 posts, read 1,588,195 times
Reputation: 17816
"The Leisure Seeker." I am not going to say any more about that, though, in case someone has not seen it and want to do so.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcSDTGliF3g
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Old 09-02-2019, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Canada
5,842 posts, read 4,276,520 times
Reputation: 15760
Quote:
Originally Posted by johngolf View Post
Not many posts but let me tell you of my situation. My wife was ill with cancer. Not debilitating at first but then she had a minor brain aneurysm so her days of being able to drive, go out alone, etc. were over. I became concerned about how would she do without me? The answer is she could not live independently. We began looking at places that offered independent living but could be upgraded to assisted living. I wanted to be sure she would be taken care of if something happened to me. Well she passed before we made any decision.

After she passed, I had to change my thinking from us..us...us to me...me..me. Took some time to do it but it has been 4 years and I have a good handle on it. I am 77 and still active. No running marathons but active enough to get around and do most anything I want to do. I would not remarry (unless she was quite a bit younger....LOL) as I never want to be in a position of taking care of and worrying about an ill wife ever again. My Final Exit plan is that when I get to a point that I, and I alone, consider my quality of life is no more, I plan on taking my own life. As of now, I am far from that point but I do have a plan.

The thing about the sentence in bold is, is that you might not have all your faculties about you to take your own life, or you might decide then that you aren't "quite" ready for it. Nothing wrong with either of them, but I certainly understand where you're coming from.

I do NOT want to ever burden my husband or my two sons, and hope I go quickly which ever way it is.

It truly sucks visiting a loved one in a dependent living home. What depressing places they are. People sit around in wheelchairs or in their beds waiting to die and talking/socializing with no one. It isn't life, it's just being alive when you don't want to be.
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Old 09-02-2019, 06:30 PM
 
264 posts, read 130,609 times
Reputation: 643
My husband has gone downhill fast. In June he walked into the hospital, throwing up blood. Now it is Sept. 2, and he cannot push himself out of the chair. Most of what he tries to eat makes him nauseated.

I am his assist in our version of "assisted living." We are having a ramp built for his walker. We don't have the $$$ for assisted living, but we can afford to make minor changes to help.

Is it fun? No. Wiping someone's rear end never is. But it is what it is, and I love him.
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Old 09-02-2019, 08:29 PM
 
726 posts, read 221,156 times
Reputation: 1826
I am so sorry Susana. My mom took care of my dad for 14 years. I helped also.
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Old Yesterday, 07:18 AM
 
Location: delaware
694 posts, read 874,825 times
Reputation: 2410
Quote:
Originally Posted by SouthernSusana View Post
My husband has gone downhill fast. In June he walked into the hospital, throwing up blood. Now it is Sept. 2, and he cannot push himself out of the chair. Most of what he tries to eat makes him nauseated.

I am his assist in our version of "assisted living." We are having a ramp built for his walker. We don't have the $$$ for assisted living, but we can afford to make minor changes to help.

Is it fun? No. Wiping someone's rear end never is. But it is what it is, and I love him.






Very sad, and very difficult. I had some of that with my husband.
Prayers, comfort, blessings...


Catsy
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Old Yesterday, 09:02 AM
 
30,032 posts, read 35,169,794 times
Reputation: 11943
Default How not to grow old in America

The following is presented as food for thought and discussion. Seems like something we should consider as we evaluate future options.


https://www.businesstimes.com.sg/opi...old-in-america

Quote:
ASSISTED living seems like the solution to everyone's worries about old age. It's built on the dream that we can grow old while being self-reliant, and live that way until we die, that all we need is a tiny bit of help, and that we would never want to be warehoused in a nursing home with round-the-clock caregivers. This is a powerful concept in a country built on independence and self-reliance.
The problem is that, for most of us, it's a lie. And we are all complicit in perpetuating that lie.
It is written from the perspective of a non senior reflection on the needs of elderly parents and how to help them without taking on a burden themselves.
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Old Yesterday, 10:26 AM
 
Location: Ypsilanti, MI
2,532 posts, read 3,735,629 times
Reputation: 4996
I never realized these facilities were exempted from standards required of Nursing Homes. I always considered them a sub-set of Nursing Homes, facilities for Seniors who required the least amount of assistance.
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Old Yesterday, 10:36 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
8,265 posts, read 5,062,295 times
Reputation: 30293
Quote:
Originally Posted by TuborgP View Post
The following is presented as food for thought and discussion. Seems like something we should consider as we evaluate future options.
No, thanks. I've had enough doom and gloom. But you go ahead and wallow, if you want.

Anne Tergesen of the Wall Street Journal notes, "Older adults who focus primarily on the downsides of aging need to recognize that they are doing themselves more harm than they might imagine. Researchers are finding that if we think about getting older primarily in terms of decline or disability, our health likely will suffer. Conversely, if we tend to view aging in terms of opportunity and growth, our bodies respond in kind."
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