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Old Today, 07:15 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
6,091 posts, read 5,018,324 times
Reputation: 20791

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Quote:
Originally Posted by marino760 View Post
Going to work almost every day of my life for me has gotten really old. Take a couple of aspirin for your hurting head and go back to work if you enjoy it, and don't worry about other people who choose a different life style. It won't affect your life. And for goodness sake, stop smacking yourself
That's probably why his head is hurting, all that head smacking. Haha
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Old Today, 07:20 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
8,370 posts, read 5,123,083 times
Reputation: 30636
Quote:
Originally Posted by katharsis View Post
^^ Fluffy, I did NOT say that ERH "wanted to force his father to do something than sit around all day", and I did not even IMPLY that! Please read my post again and then quote where you think I did.

And why "pick on" me in particular? If you go back and read my posts and the other posts, I think you will find that others were much more strident in their "attacks" (my word, not yours!) on the OP -- and in fact, I didn't attack the OP at all unless you consider that fact that I was clear in stating my belief that the kind of retirement a retiree has is up to the retiree to be an attack. (Or do you disagree with that opinion?)
I'm "picking on you" -- lol, are we in grade school now? -- because you were one of the first to attack the OP. Then you came back for another swing at the pinata. When someone lashes out, that encourages others. The Retirement forum has a pack mentality.

You said, "it is his (the father's) choice what he wants to do with his time, as most of us have said." This is so patently obvious that it needn't be said, yet you keep saying it. Your clear implication is that the OP wants to remove his father's choice. That you are denying it now is hilarious.

Do people ever stop to wonder why the original posters don't return? Why would anyone want to?
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Old Today, 07:20 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
24,354 posts, read 18,147,137 times
Reputation: 28636
Quote:
Originally Posted by jrkliny View Post
OP, you seem to have gotten more criticism than agreement. While I do agree everyone has a right to decide on their lifestyle, I understand the concern. As we get older and older it can be more difficult to have the drive to accomplish anything. Many old people just seem like they were waiting to die. I agree I do not want to end up that way. Even worse are years of semi-vegetative living and senility spend in a nursing home. Maybe the biological imperative will take over, but I have plans not to end that way.
You wouldn’t believe the number of “take me on home Lord” comments I’ve heard over the years.
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Old Today, 07:23 AM
 
420 posts, read 110,252 times
Reputation: 846
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave_n_Tenn View Post
Sitting is the new smoking. The couch is the enemy.

True but a lot of employees work sitting at a desk all day. Just because you retire doesn't mean you have to sit all day.
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Old Today, 07:42 AM
 
Location: Central IL
15,387 posts, read 8,793,253 times
Reputation: 36212
Quote:
Originally Posted by james112 View Post
True but a lot of employees work sitting at a desk all day. Just because you retire doesn't mean you have to sit all day.
No, but the idea that if you're sitting you aren't doing anything of value is false. Some have the notion that "doing" anything is better than reading or learning or listening to something. I'm not using my mind if I'm learning something new online....is all tv worthless? What if it's NatGeo I'm watching? It's better to mindlessly prune in the garden than edit videos/photos I've taken? Maybe it's better if I do my editing while walking on a treadmill or at least standing up at my computer?

Some people have a very rigid hierarchy of "activities". favoring marathons it seems.

In the same way, others are snobbish - that if you're not inventing or creating something then you're a waste as well. These must be the same people who over-scheduled their kids in a dozen after school activities to be sure they didn't spend a minute of their time daydreaming.

You'd think that by the time someone has retired they've earned the right as an "elder" to do what they want - I guess you just can never stop people from judging though.
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Old Today, 07:49 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
6,091 posts, read 5,018,324 times
Reputation: 20791
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
Here's the OP. Show me where ERH said he wanted to force his father to do something other than sitting around all day.


You and others have invented a straw man so you could have the pleasure of self-righteously skewering it.
I don't think anyone's saying that OP wanted to make his dad DO something. I just think it's the tone of the OP that people IN THEIR 80's who seem to have no desire to be productive are somehow pitiable and to pray that he never turns out that way. And most folks here are just saying NOT to sound so condescending, and looking down his nose at his father's life. It is HIS FATHER's life, not his, and he has no idea what he himself will feel like, or be capable of, at 80. It's just like a 20-something who says "I hope I never turn into an old poop like you!" when their parent tells them maybe they should start saving a bit of their paycheck for an emergency fund, or retirement, instead of buying a $1000 phone. OP is coming from an entirely different frame of reference from his father.

Please Lord, don't let me get to the point that I think I know everything and can pass judgements on other people's lives when all I ought to be feeling is compassion and love for them.
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Old Today, 07:51 AM
 
7,413 posts, read 1,635,501 times
Reputation: 18093
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
I'm "picking on you" -- lol, are we in grade school now? -- because you were one of the first to attack the OP. Then you came back for another swing at the pinata. When someone lashes out, that encourages others. The Retirement forum has a pack mentality.

You said, "it is his (the father's) choice what he wants to do with his time, as most of us have said." This is so patently obvious that it needn't be said, yet you keep saying it. Your clear implication is that the OP wants to remove his father's choice. That you are denying it now is hilarious.

Do people ever stop to wonder why the original posters don't return? Why would anyone want to?
You had said that I had said(or implied) that ERH "wanted to force his father to do something than sit around all day". As I said before, that was NOT what I said and NOT what I implied. You simply read into my post something that was not there. Also, of course, you did not quote where I did say or implied that the OP was trying to force his/her father to do something because you couldn't.

This was my first post (#8) -- italics added -- on the subject which was in reply to another poster.

-----------------------------

Originally Posted by ccc123 /

You have the type of retirement you want and let others have the type of retirement they want. I'm going to be doing a lot of what others are sure to see as nothing, leisurely morning coffee, taking walks, tackling my to be read list, book club, watching TV and movies, sitting on my porch watching the birds, taking naps and the occasionally traveling. After working in a very physical job for 30+ years with a 3 hour a day commute I've earned the right to do whatever I want when I want.


MY REPLY:

Well said!!!

Why do some people think that what is good (or not good) for them is good (or not good) for everyone?! And that applies to many things, I think, and not just retirement!

P.S. to OP -- Yes, I know that you implied in your post that you do agree with the above at least to some degree, but your post did come across to many of us as being VERY judgmental. (And, yes, you DO have the right to your opinions and to express them, as we all do!)


-----------------------

The fact is that it did not even enter my mind that the OP was trying to force the father to do something. (Of course, you can believe that or not, but that is the truth.)

Furthermore, the only other post I made on this thread was #72 (except for the one in which I responded to you) in which I said that there was nothing wrong with encouraging sedentary retirees to be more active because of their health.

To summarize, NOTHING I said was at all out of line, although I don't think the same can be said of your replies to me. In any case I am now leaving this thread permanently because I have said all I have to say to you and also about this subject.
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Old Today, 07:52 AM
 
24 posts, read 1,499 times
Reputation: 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by ERH View Post
Apologies in advance to those of you who like to spend every day piddling around and doing nothing but watch the grass grow, but I think I'd rather eat my gun than to live a life without some kind of goal or purpose and *something* to strive for and/or get done every day.

My 80yo dad just watches the hours pass on the clock, book-ending his days with morning coffee and evening supper, with not much to show for the entire day in between. On occasion, he'll get fired up to do something in his workshop, but other than that, nada.

I fully recognize that I have NO RIGHT TO JUDGE. It's his retirement and he can do, or not do, whatever he pleases. It just kills me to see someone -- anyone -- wasting precious time.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WZ33w3B8Hw
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Old Today, 07:57 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
8,370 posts, read 5,123,083 times
Reputation: 30636
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
I don't think anyone's saying that OP wanted to make his dad DO something. I just think it's the tone of the OP that people IN THEIR 80's who seem to have no desire to be productive are somehow pitiable and to pray that he never turns out that way.
Because heaven knows no one is ever allowed to have a differing opinion, especially about what they want for themselves.

Quote:
And most folks here are just saying NOT to sound so condescending, and looking down his nose at his father's life.

He's not looking down his nose at his father. He's contemplating the enormity of ending up that way, which is part and parcel of being human.

Quote:
It is HIS FATHER's life, not his
No, really?

I'm done here. You folks can continue to twist yourselves into knots to justify the hatchet job you did on the OP. I'm sure that will give many other people the courage and space to openly discuss their fears about aging in this forum. And later that day, pigs will fly.
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Old Today, 08:02 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
6,091 posts, read 5,018,324 times
Reputation: 20791
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
Because heaven knows no one is ever allowed to have a differing opinion, especially about what they want for themselves.


He's not looking down at his father. He's contemplating the enormity of ending up that way.


No, really?



I'm done here. You folks can continue to twist yourselves into knots to justify the hatchet job you did on the OP.
Bwaaahhahahaha! The enormity of ending up content to live a quiet life in his 80's. Oh the horror!

I almost spit out my Cheerios.
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