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Old 09-15-2019, 09:22 PM
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
23,057 posts, read 40,601,434 times
Reputation: 24440


Probably a combination of things (May include depression, but... aging (chemical changes / metabolism...), changing priorities and interests, overwhelming changes in society / tasks

Please take Baby steps...
1) Take a limited inventory of some LITTLE things you want to accomplish (not too many things 1-3 is fine)
2) Set aside the resources to assure these can be accomplished (time, supplies, instruction, assistance if necessary)
3) Consider 'motivation' / incentives. (small treats / bonus to reward for progress or completion)
4) Accountability partner - encouragement, someone who will love you through this time and project (not a 'scolder' (yet )
6) Measure of progress (checklist will do)

Reality... you will feel a LOT better as you get even the 'small things' accomplished.
Several on this forum have BTDT and can encourage and support you, and advise far better than I.

REST in the fact you are important and valuable and will get through this.
Looking back, I hope you can see how you have overcome much in the past, this is just another chapter, and it will pass.

Make a little progress every day / every hour.
No more need to do it ALL yourself.
Ask and accept help

Say thanks. (to others, to yourself)

Share some of your dreams.... It is not impossible to still accomplish some travel or other dreams.
Maybe someone here can help you realize next steps / completion of some dreams and desires.
77+ can be fine for many such adventures.

Just spent the day with friends who are 87 and 89. They have had the best 5 yrs they could imagine, and looking forward to more. Yet they have had plenty of struggles / setbacks.

I was greatly encouraged by our time together.
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Old 09-15-2019, 09:22 PM
Location: Santa Monica, Ca
7,268 posts, read 4,040,523 times
Reputation: 17581
I kicked him out.
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Old 09-15-2019, 09:52 PM
774 posts, read 916,731 times
Reputation: 1183
I got lucky, I inherited my fathers strength of discipline. Quick smoking many years ago, don't drink, quit drinking soda also. Not that hard for me. Now I'm old, retired, no problems (yet) no need for meds (yet). Feel great.
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Old 09-15-2019, 10:19 PM
Location: Boca Raton, FL
5,243 posts, read 8,793,219 times
Reputation: 6421
Smile Bad habit

When I was in high school, I remember day dreaming. I got over it; don't know how but it went away for many years until about 2 years ago.

Now, I find myself daydreaming again. Some of the events I dream about were in the past and a lot of it is stuff I actually dreamed about at one time. Of course, I'm 28 again (LOL).

Such as going far away to college and then I open the huge door and wake up.....

I also remember being somewhere once and thinking I had been there once before. It really bothered me for a while but I forgot about it.

I do better when I have a deadline and I have them a lot.
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Old Yesterday, 06:08 AM
Location: Central NY
4,877 posts, read 3,380,409 times
Reputation: 12638
First of all, some wonderful ideas here, thank you!
Bette..... I used to have that feeling, of being somewhere before with no actual proof I had been. There is a term for that but I can't remember what it is.

I've been thinking a lot about how much my life has changed. And how grateful I am for that. I am a lot more peaceful, things that were very important at one time no longer are. I breathe easy (no panic or fear), etc.

So now how I feel about not getting things done is a real contrast to not caring if they do get done.

But I also believe things change, maybe another lesson to learn. I am a believer, there is a plan for my life. So basically I think I went through this recent time of peace, quiet, to recharge, rest, "forget" all the turmoil I've lived through.

So what's next? Another adventure? This is where my limitations get in the way. Everything I would like to do is based on me doing by myself, not depending on another person. It's hard to accept change in the way that some of my dreams will need to be accomplished a new way. I need to learn to depend on other ways instead of always thinking I'm independent and don't need any help.

I've done some reading about living with glaucoma and other sight problems. Yesterday and into most of the night my eyes were so itchy they drove me nuts. Nothing alleviated that. I do have drops and use them frequently but they didn't help last night. Always something.
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Old Yesterday, 07:08 AM
Location: Coastal New Jersey
57,442 posts, read 55,656,421 times
Reputation: 68450
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
OMG - I am a big time procrastinator!! But then i tell myself that i always manage to get things done, so that must be good - right?

But now that i am older, i don't want to leave this earth with a lot of things left for others to do.

Today i culled one desk drawer.

That is what i do now - one small task a day and get it done.

Maybe we just have a better sense of timing than others that get all worked up and have to get things done right away??

I'm rarely late for appointments.
I had to learn to do that. I would get overwhelmed with the size of tasks, and then I learned to just break it down and do one little thing at a time.
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Old Yesterday, 09:04 AM
13,120 posts, read 14,367,049 times
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Originally Posted by NYgal1542 View Post
....Any one out there have something like that going on? If you do and you got over it, how did you do it?
My worst was alcoholism, and that took screwing up my life for twenty plus years for me to "get it."

Currently it was/is an increasing tendency to procrastinate, and I used to be more like a do-it-now person when I was younger. I haven't gotten over it really, but maybe I have a kind of loose control now. What happens is that I now have "work binges", days where I spend the whole day catching up on all the things I should have been doing as they came up.

Today was one of those days (I'm feeling like such a prince)....but starting tomorrow I will find that I have "room" again to begin procrastinating until another work binge overwhelms me.
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Old Yesterday, 10:17 AM
Location: Central NY
4,877 posts, read 3,380,409 times
Reputation: 12638
kevxu: Congratulations to "getting it." Something for you to feel good about.

Unfortunately none of my family ever "got it." I didn't drink or use, but I sure got the behavior.

You have no doubt heard the expression..... "how do you eat an elephant"? ..... "one bite at a time." It makes sense to me. I'm just not applying it to my own life.

I know you have arthritis from other posts you have written, so you understand how pain can slow you down more than we thought possible. Mix that in with some other physical problems, depression can set in.

I've also realized how rigid I am. It's all about which vacuum cleaner should I get. I've been thinking I need a big one to pick up cat hair, etc. but having trouble managing the weight and bulk. Duh. Plenty of light-weight, cordless (my cat chewed the last cord right through) cleaners to choose from. It seems to take me forever to understand these things.

I think I'm feeling a twinge of ambition which means I need to act on it while it's "hot."
Thanks kevxu!
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Old Yesterday, 10:29 AM
Location: Columbia SC
9,285 posts, read 8,023,199 times
Reputation: 12853
I finally beat smoking (after some 55 years and many false starts) by attending a non smoking class that worked more on weaning you down before stopping. I was also taking Chantix for about a month during which time I stopped smoking entirely. I stopped the Chantix and had a large nicotine lozenge habit for about 2 months. I was popping them suckers like candy. I wound down on their strength and finally stopped. Took me about 3 months to be off everything.
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Old Yesterday, 10:52 AM
6,496 posts, read 3,707,635 times
Reputation: 22833
Originally Posted by NYgal1542 View Post
I'm slipping back into this (late for appointments). I don't understand why I think I have more time to get somewhere than I actually have. I seem to always wait till the last minute for everything. I don't like it, get angry with myself, but so far I have not changed.
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
Maybe you don't want to go?
LOL! There's a sweatshirt for that. On the front is says, "Sorry I'm late. I didn't want to come."
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