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Old 09-28-2019, 04:26 PM
 
4,394 posts, read 6,168,914 times
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I volunteered once at my son's private school. It was office work and I was harrassed so it was a one time only thing. I overheard (it was meant to be overheard) "Must be nice to have enough money that you can volunteer for free." It came from mothers who were working at the school for free or discounted tuition for their child. I quit and I went home and called the headmaster. It taught me a lesson. You never know how a good deed can be misconstrued. After that I kept to myself. You never know how good intentions can be interpreted.
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Old 09-28-2019, 07:08 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
10,021 posts, read 7,313,409 times
Reputation: 14990
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrkool View Post
Of all the things you could do to be helping people, why would you help people heading north to enter my country illegally? Surely there are seniors, disabled, or others in your town you could give assistance to, rather than invaders heading for the USA.

This is a touchy subject with me because my native southern California has absolutely changed for the worse largely due to the massive numbers of illegals who've flooded in during the past 20+ years. And I won't elaborate beyond that.

As for the main topic here, volunteering, I give rides to some older folks without transportation, and did a year volunteering at the local VA hospital. The latter didn't work out due to too many volunteers and not enough work.
They don't turn any volunteers away, and there are only so many places to put them, so you end up with jobs like patient transport (within hospital) overmanned, and the volunteers mostly sitting around and
socializing while waiting for the occasional transport request to be generated. Making it worse were the hogs who would just come back in to the office from making a run, then snatch the very next request that was generated while the rest of us sat there idle.
I brought these problems up to the proper managers, nothing changed, so I quit.

My husband was a VA employee for many years before he retired. Apparently volunteers at the VA are entitled to a free meal while they are there. My husband used to say many of them were there for the free meal and jealously guarded the duties they were assigned, to make sure no one else did them.

He came home one day with a set of long angry-looking scratches running the length of one of his arms. When I asked him what happened, he said he "was attacked by an old lady". Apparently he was at the copy machine, running copies of something or other for a meeting, and one of the volunteers attempted to stop him, pull him away from the copy machine and scratched him in the process with her long fingernails. It seems she did photocopying as a volunteer, and saw my husband doing his own copying as a threat to her volunteer gig, taking away her job or something.

Too bad, that attack on my husband ended her volunteer gig. Can't have volunteers attacking employees, or anyone else onthe premises,for that matter.
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Old 09-28-2019, 07:33 PM
 
Location: Guadalajara, MX
6,350 posts, read 3,104,816 times
Reputation: 12203
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marc Paolella View Post
Making sure they stay on the train?
They can't, when trains stop at depots they can get caught plus there is no food and water when riding illegally on a cargo train.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrkool View Post
Of all the things you could do to be helping people, why would you help people heading north to enter my country illegally? Surely there are seniors, disabled, or others in your town you could give assistance to, rather than invaders heading for the USA.
They are much worse off than most seniors or disabled around here. Hungrier, poorer, and more likely to be victimized.
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Old 09-28-2019, 07:39 PM
 
Location: Florida Baby!
5,635 posts, read 731,793 times
Reputation: 3571
This is timely for me.

I'm a newbie retiree--I've been retired just over a year and moved from CT to FL where I knew NO ONE.

As I really don't know anyone here I though it was high time to get "social." Generally speaking, I'm perfectly contented to by myself. The issue is when I want to go to an event--going solo is not fun, especially if you're an introvert. The other issue looming in the back of my head is that I have no local emergency contact which could become problematic.

This week I went to the local women's service organization meeting to check it out. I thought it might be a great way to meet new people. As soon as the meeting started I gave myself a virtual head smack What was I thinking??? I felt like I was at work!

I'm not dissing the organization--they do wonderful work--emphasis on WORK. Not something I had in mind when I retired.

I have never been a "joiner" and I'm a diehard commitment-phobe. And I ABSOLUTELY HATE when other people volunteer ME. This happened for my high school's 50th reunion. I got saddle with updating the class contact list and researching the internet to find current contact info. This was because someone mentioned that I was on FB all the time. The head of the reunion committee didn't have a FB account and assumed that all I needed to do is to "look up" people on facebook. I wound up paying for a month's membership to a people finding website to do the research.

But I digress....

I'm just glad to see that a few others here feel the same way I do.

Last edited by Daisy Grey; 09-28-2019 at 07:51 PM..
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Old 09-28-2019, 07:43 PM
 
Location: Florida Baby!
5,635 posts, read 731,793 times
Reputation: 3571
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunGrins View Post
I volunteered...now I'm vice president of the organization. Since I wouldn't go away they made me an officer. There is a lesson there.
And I wonder why I'm a "commitment-phobe??"
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Old 09-29-2019, 07:03 AM
 
6,700 posts, read 5,359,319 times
Reputation: 13962
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy Grey View Post
This is timely for me.

I'm a newbie retiree--I've been retired just over a year and moved from CT to FL where I knew NO ONE.

As I really don't know anyone here I though it was high time to get "social." Generally speaking, I'm perfectly contented to by myself. The issue is when I want to go to an event--going solo is not fun, especially if you're an introvert. The other issue looming in the back of my head is that I have no local emergency contact which could become problematic.

This week I went to the local women's service organization meeting to check it out. I thought it might be a great way to meet new people. As soon as the meeting started I gave myself a virtual head smack What was I thinking??? I felt like I was at work!

I'm not dissing the organization--they do wonderful work--emphasis on WORK. Not something I had in mind when I retired.

I have never been a "joiner" and I'm a diehard commitment-phobe. And I ABSOLUTELY HATE when other people volunteer ME. This happened for my high school's 50th reunion. I got saddle with updating the class contact list and researching the internet to find current contact info. This was because someone mentioned that I was on FB all the time. The head of the reunion committee didn't have a FB account and assumed that all I needed to do is to "look up" people on facebook. I wound up paying for a month's membership to a people finding website to do the research.

But I digress....

I'm just glad to see that a few others here feel the same way I do.
the same thing kind of happened to me for our class reunion

A "friend" decided on her own to start up a committee.

It was going well until she i guess had a meltdown. I didn't realize how tense she could get about following through. I ended up having to finalize things - getting food and location set up. Now that i think of it - that was most of the real hands on work. She was getting kind of bossy too. People it is a volunteer thing - no need to bark orders!

Which is one reason i dreaded this last weeks gig. And sure enough bossy sibling was there complaining about why we didn't do this or that. Well why were you not at the meeting when we finalized things. I just ignored her.
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Old 09-29-2019, 09:44 AM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
37,746 posts, read 46,613,748 times
Reputation: 63240
I thought I would enjoy reading to a kindergarten once a week. I responded to the ad and found that it was a Lions Club project. Before I knew it, I was paying dues and expected to attend meetings and volunteer for other service projects.

I do read to the kindergarten, but I just say no to everything else. What I hate, now that I’m retired, is to have to be places at a certain time.
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Old 09-29-2019, 11:03 AM
 
6,700 posts, read 5,359,319 times
Reputation: 13962
Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
I thought I would enjoy reading to a kindergarten once a week. I responded to the ad and found that it was a Lions Club project. Before I knew it, I was paying dues and expected to attend meetings and volunteer for other service projects.

I do read to the kindergarten, but I just say no to everything else. What I hate, now that Iím retired, is to have to be places at a certain time.
That's the thing also - having a "shedule"
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Old 09-29-2019, 11:23 AM
 
Location: New Mexico
7,163 posts, read 3,974,606 times
Reputation: 13547
Quote:
Originally Posted by delunsa View Post
Yeah, nobody wants the job.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy Grey View Post
And I wonder why I'm a "commitment-phobe??"
There is some truth to that -- it is hard to get people to commit time and energy but there are some rewards as well. While it gets busy occasionally I support the work that we are doing. Sometimes it seems that our society is collapsing in on itself and that retirement age people are the last bastion of actual social interaction. Of course younger folks are preoccupied with families, PTA (is that still a thing?), soccer practice, careers, etc.

I was president of a men's group that was dying off and dwindling away to the point that we were joking about resorting to taxidermy to get a quorum -- just keep the old, dearly departed guys stuffed and in a closet until we had to vote on something. The by-laws didn't actually say the members had to be alive.
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Old 09-29-2019, 12:55 PM
 
2,837 posts, read 801,027 times
Reputation: 7406
I just want to thank everyone for keeping it real here. All too often articles will just blithely say that volunteering is the best way for fulfillment in retirement. You'll still be contributing! You'll get out of the house! You'll meet people!

I always worked a job in health/human services and it did make me feel good about myself to be helping others. But when it got to the point that it was diminishing my physical and mental health more than I was helping others, I escaped from the work world (and trust me, I know all too well that the nonprofit world can be just as corrupt and soul-deadening as any other job).

I tried looking at Volunteer Match for opportunities I would enjoy, but there really didn't seem to be that much. I have a friend who volunteered in a hospital and there wasn't that much for her to do---and she would up when there was something to do just doing the work of paid workers who would then sit around and take breaks.

I know someone who loves volunteering for her garden club---it's a wonderful fit for her. Unfortunately, my interests and passions, as an introvert, tend more towards those that don't involve interacting with other people. I love to read, but I'm really picky about what I read, so it wouldn't work very well for me to volunteer to read to others. I love to cook, but volunteering in a soup kitchen wouldn't do well for me since I wouldn't like handling meat. I don't want to get involved with politics.

So I've worked through the guilt of not volunteering, but I will always be open to the right opportunity should it ever come along. There IS actually something I'd like to. Fifty years ago when I was 16, I participated in a center for alternative youth (people who didn't like typical high school activities, were more counter-culture). It was a place to hang out (before there were Starbucks) and listen to music. It was amazing to have a place where I fit in. But there aren't many programs like that. The only thing close is a teen night club, but the music now would be too loud for me, it's profit-making, so it would be insane to volunteer, and they limit adults participating there since these days sadly there would be the risk of adults having less than ideal reasons for volunteering with teens.
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