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Old 06-07-2013, 06:58 AM
10,357 posts, read 9,388,551 times
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Originally Posted by loveautumn View Post
After doing alot of retirement research, there would be quite alot more places to consider to move to if I was part of a couple rather than being single. Generally a couple would have more money in retirement and having a husband/wife to help each other and care about each other, especially when health problems arise, makes a big difference emotionally/stress-wise. I know their are advantages and disadvantages to both, but watching my married friends and my single friends in retirement, the married ones are better off, IMO. But I think this is generally true in every stage of adult life, not just in retirement.
^^Excellent points! I am going solo and finances are the biggest issue for me. I do enjoy living alone and not sure if, after all these years, I could easily adjust to living with another person. Having someone else to 'do things with' seems to be easier for couples vs. a person living alone, unless of course one has friendships with other senior singles.

I also heartily agree about health issues; another person in the home can be a wonderful source of help and support.

Also agree with Curmudgeon's line of thinking about 'healthy' relationships. It's better to live alone and handle everyone yourself than being miserable in a bad situation.
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Old 06-07-2013, 10:29 AM
Location: Schererville, IN
171 posts, read 181,117 times
Reputation: 179
You may want to think seriously about a co-housing community where you can build relationship that can help you should you need it before others in the community do.

Too many folks look at their circumstances at their current point in life not realizing that they are very likely to change (health, finances, death of a spouse) and don't neccessarily choose retirement options that may be better long term.

We are starting a 55+ co-housing community targeted at musicians and artist of all skill levels as well as anyone whose love of music, art, and a sense of community burns deep within them.

Last edited by earlyretirement; 06-07-2013 at 12:42 PM.. Reason: No advertising
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Old 06-07-2013, 11:33 AM
Location: SW US
2,220 posts, read 2,037,561 times
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The first thing I looked into was co-housing. I found those places to be really expensive. Also they generally have work requirements and I already (late 60's) see that as being difficult for me. I've been thinking the pocket neighborhoods may work better.
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Old 06-07-2013, 10:02 PM
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,747,361 times
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Originally Posted by brightcopperkettles View Post
Thank you all. The other major concern is my husband has bad lungs and a bad back from his years as a firefighter. The humidity in the South would kill him. The rain up here is too much for me to bear. The Southwest is dry enough but still too expensive.

I was thinking the Midwest somewhere, but I don't know where exactly. Seems most of those places get pretty hot in the summer and pretty cold in the winter. But I have got to get out of this 9 months of rain up here. I was thinking maybe Nebraska, Iowa, Kansas, or Missouri. They are all right smack in the middle of the country, and I know the cost of living is better there. I just am not sure about everything else, i.e., taxes, weather, etc. I have been reading all the information given on these states here, but I really want to know about retirement in those places, taxes, etc.

I thank you all SO much for answering my questions and respectfully ask for any more information anyone has to offer. I am reading everything and listening to all.
Here it is six years later and someone has revived this thread, so I don't know if you are still around on City-Data, but I would suggest Las Cruces, New Mexico as meeting most of your requirements. You would have to drive to El Paso to get to an airport, but it's only 40 miles away.
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Old 02-05-2014, 04:17 AM
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Just a quick reply to OREGONRAIN.......u r ABSOLUTELY right about North Carolina. I live in NC and it is very, very family oriented. Every where I look to retire seems to be overrun w/couples and they don't seem overly friendly to having a retired, single female in the mix. I honestly think that they would put up a sign "Couples Only" (sometimes "Nice Christian Couples Only!") if they could get away with it!! Not kidding!! I am trying to find someplace much better to retire but it is very difficult. I have neither the funds nor a network of friends/family to rely on for advice and/or suggestions. Good luck in your search.
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Old 02-05-2014, 07:58 AM
Location: Loudon, TN
5,788 posts, read 4,843,885 times
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I would think that for single retirees a university town would be ideal. Many have a compact and vibrant core near the university with bookstores, coffee shops, restaurants and bars. It is also a great way to stay young at heart being around the students. There are usually many plays and musical performances and a great college library too. That would be a real possibility to me if I were on my own again someday. My other option would be getting into a roommate situation with an old friend in which each of us would rent a 2 or 3 bedroom unit in two locations we enjoy and go back and forth, either together or singly as we wish. We would have variety, company, and sometimes a little solitude if we want it. I have a few friends that I know would be compatible in this type of arrangement. If either of us found ourselves in a temporary health situations, say post-surgery, or chemo or something, we could help each other out.
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Old 02-05-2014, 02:40 PM
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The issue with old friends caring for each other is, they are likely to be about the same age, and likely to have the same kinds of care needs at the same time. I am thinking of a relative who is totally car-dependent, as are her friends, and she says, "We'll take care of each other," but people are living quite scattered, some are leaving that area for cheaper living, and they are roughly the same age.

I have made financial plans to have the means to hire help with some things and then, if necessary and desirable, move to a CCRC. All I really want is an indoor pool and restaurant meals!
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Old 02-05-2014, 03:08 PM
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I want the restaurant meals and a maid
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Old 02-05-2014, 05:55 PM
Location: Waterville
332 posts, read 428,380 times
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My perspective is that of a single woman with no children.

I envisioned retirement as the time to reinvent myself - to become more like the person I should have been. I didn't have a career, just jobs, and work always sucked the life out of me. Retirement would bring me the freedom to indulge all my interests. But now that the end of work is mere months away I am ... terrified.

I am not as healthy as I assumed I would be and my income will be small. I have always planned to return to my home state where my two sisters live. We are not 'family' people. Neither of them had children either.

If you are part of a couple, your partner has to pick you up when you fall down. I must always rely on myself. And most couples have a double income. I really wanted to move somewhere rural, raise chickens, build a smokehouse, plant gardens. But alone? When I am not sure if my mobility and energy will keep up with? Doesn't seem prudent.

For those who are single, healthy, and successful, the choices multiply. For someone like myself, the lack of a partner or a support system limit the options.
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Old 02-05-2014, 06:11 PM
Location: Edina, MN, USA
6,954 posts, read 7,396,297 times
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Originally Posted by LookingatFL View Post
I want the restaurant meals and a maid
I want a honey on demand to work on my honey-do list. Then he can go home I'll gladly cook my own meals - didn't cook much when I worked so now that I have time I plan to take lots of cooking classes. A maid - I'd just clean before she got there. I want a yard person ~ or ~ a very small grass area.
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