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Old 10-20-2009, 11:09 AM
 
4,077 posts, read 6,418,343 times
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Allow me to point out that many of the posters here have the resources to provide services for themselves in most situations. I would guess that for every one senior who has the means there are hundreds of seniors that do not have the financial resources for any type of support. Many of these seniors will die and remain undetected until someone notices the foul odor. Worse, many will have strokes or similar health crisis that leaves them unable to move to seek help. In these cases they may die from exposure or starvation. Secondly, there are many seniors living alone whose only company is a pet that will suffer the consequences in these dire cases.
Most of our society has little to no time for seniors. Isn't sad to see more people volunteering to care for stray animals that to look in on seniors who are alone? Now I am not saying that stray animals don't need care, they do, and am I glad there are people doing it, but I also think some where along the way elders need to have the same type of consideration.
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Old 10-21-2009, 02:19 PM
 
257 posts, read 926,362 times
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Default May have found them!

As I said, I think, I live in Durham, NC. And, btw, it is worth it to me to be home & out of the shower at a specific time every day!

Yesterday, I was at The Bishop's House on the Duke Campus for an OLLI class, and came across the booklet "Durham Senior Resource Guide." In it, I found a listing for "Reassurance Calls" from Hopeline, Inc. 919-231-4525. (They also do suicide calls & teen calls of some sort). They indicated that they will contact somebody on your list if you fail to answer. Not sure how else they operate (ie, retrys, etc). They are sending me papers to fill out.

Persistence pays!
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Old 10-21-2009, 06:40 PM
 
Location: SoCal desert
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Hope it works for you, Judy! Everyone needs their own peace of mind.
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Old 10-21-2009, 07:41 PM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
2,172 posts, read 6,886,609 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donsabi View Post
Allow me to point out that many of the posters here have the resources to provide services for themselves in most situations. I would guess that for every one senior who has the means there are hundreds of seniors that do not have the financial resources for any type of support. Many of these seniors will die and remain undetected until someone notices the foul odor. Worse, many will have strokes or similar health crisis that leaves them unable to move to seek help. In these cases they may die from exposure or starvation. Secondly, there are many seniors living alone whose only company is a pet that will suffer the consequences in these dire cases.
There are free services available. There's Safelink which provides free cellphone service to those on SSI, Medicaid, etc.
https://www.safelinkwireless.com/EnrollmentPublic/how_to_qlfy.aspx (broken link)
It meant mainly to be used in emergencies. If you've got it in a pocket you can at least call 911.
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Old 10-21-2009, 08:28 PM
 
4,608 posts, read 7,290,878 times
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scrappinJudy - - "are you ok" phone calls

Judy, this is a terrific thread you've started here on a topic far too few people discuss or even think about. As the boomers move on into that post whatever it is we were doing, we need to start laying that ground work for who's going to be watching who(m?) and what to do if someone doesn't show up.

Earlier this year I had a good friend disappear from the scene. Turns out he had a stroke and without that network of who cares, he lay on a floor for two days before anyone checked up on him. In his early sixties, he'll spend the rest of his life in a nursing home.

I now find myself hundreds of miles from any relatives, recently moved to a smaller town where I know absolutely... no one. And with two strikes in that heart disease triple play following me around, I keep my cell phone in any convenient pocket. And if this is what I'm doing, then I know there's thousands more doing the same thing.

Just goes to say, as we get older we need to learn to keep out thoughts out for each other.
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Old 10-21-2009, 10:05 PM
 
Location: Lakeland, Florida
6,972 posts, read 12,486,400 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wisteria View Post
I have those same fears, too, although I don't have any system like that for now. However, that is the very reason I moved into a 55+ mobile home park in Santa Cruz -- to be closer to people who understand the need for vigilence, and to have a larger support system of those in a similar age group.

For those who have been following our "Women Retiring Alone" thread, you know that I recently moved from the mountains to town, and one of our other regular women on that thread, Nancy thereader, just bought a home here. She just moved in this weekend from New York City!! She has such an adorable home!

When I saw the title of this thread, I looked because it was just yesterday that the moving van came for Nancy, and I actually walked over in the morning to see them moving her stuff in, and then later in the day I walked over again -- plus, she has walked to my house. This is a bonus in the age of so many people living alone!

We are trying to build our community of friends living here so that we can help each other over the decades. It is scary to think of being alone and not having someone nearby to check on you or to stop by. One of my friend's mother just died this weekend, so it brought the concept quite clearly back to me.

I still have to work full-time right now for financial reasons, but once I retire, I hope to meet many more people in the park. As usual, it is filled with single women.... Once we are more settled, I am sure Nancy will meet people that I have not met because she is already retired. I have met some nice people already -- ironically, a number originally from the eastcoast, too.

As we find it more necessary, I imagine we will put in place a system where we check on each other regularly. I am in my early 60s, and it's been quite a while that I have lived just a few doors down from a friend, and I had forgotten how nice that is. As a kid, I could easily walk to friends' houses -- but that doesn't seem to be the norm anymore for adults, especially single adults and older adults. So, it was so nice to know I have someone near by and I can just walk over in 30 seconds!

Anyone interested in joining our community here, you are welcome. Surprisingly, it is "affordable," especially if you already own a home and are planning on relocating. It's a really nice neighborhood and community, just blocks from the beach, and we are welcoming anyone who would like to live the concept of community and helping each other.

I think this thread makes good points, and all the more reason to know our neighbors and have friends check back and forth. Our children are too young to fully grasp how it feels to be aging and the worry of just dropping dead on the spot!

Thanks for starting this thread.

I think it is wonderful that two people actually met on this website, and have found what you two have found in Santa Cruz. I have seen your names on citydata for several years now, and again Im very happy that both of you found your place. Sounds likes the place sort of soothes your soul, and you found some peace and sense of community in the area.

I agree many people need exactly what you found there. A community of people that look out for one another as we all get older.

Best of Luck
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Old 10-22-2009, 06:43 AM
 
13,773 posts, read 33,906,848 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WillysB View Post
scrappinJudy - - "are you ok" phone calls

Earlier this year I had a good friend disappear from the scene. Turns out he had a stroke and without that network of who cares, he lay on a floor for two days before anyone checked up on him. In his early sixties, he'll spend the rest of his life in a nursing home.
The same thing happened to a friend of mind who was in his early 60s. He laid there for 2 days before his friend came over to check on him. They had to break down the door just to get in. He refused to go to the hospital at first but eventually he did go and has been in a nursing home ever since. He had a stroke before too.
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Old 12-27-2009, 10:05 AM
 
Location: Sherman Oaks, CA
6,239 posts, read 15,445,271 times
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This thread is a bit scary, although I'm not nearly at an age where I have to worry about it yet - at least not for myself.

I remember an article I read in the L.A. Times a long time ago. A single woman in her 50s hadn't been seen around her home for about six months, and it turns out that she had been robbed and then locked in a hall closet. They found her body, and there were claw marks on the inside of the door.

There are other concerns from living alone than just the risk of stroke or heart attack. When I'm older and find myself living alone, I'll have to do something as well so that someone is still checking at least daily to make sure I'm still alive and unharmed!
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Old 12-30-2009, 07:37 AM
 
7,979 posts, read 11,659,551 times
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It is hard for me to think that in today's internet day and age that there isn't some more organized way for seniors in neighborhoods to find and support each other. The reality is it isn't always easy for people to make new friends to rely on. Just knowing who is where and having a check in schedule doesn't require that people be friends, just that you know that they are there and have current contact info.
Neighborhood watch would be a good model, if there were a sign up service for all neighborhoods or rural regions that people could sign up to - sort of like a phone call tree - that would be a great thing.
One hard truth to talk about though - sometimes younger or busy people don't want to get involved because lonely people will tie up people who check in with long conversations. Then there are unnecessary panic calls that become an issue....it can be hard
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Old 01-01-2010, 03:12 AM
 
Location: Florida
19,792 posts, read 19,895,713 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewToCA View Post
As another poster pointed out, it would seem that this "proactive" contact process would be a bit of a anchor. I wouldn't want to have to be at my home at a specific time every day so I can respond to the phone call.

Not worth the tradeoff to me.
I just saw this and want to point out that the service my mom used didn't tie you down like this. If she was going out or going away there was a setting , basically shutting it off.
It's a good service and it would be shame if it was not used for the wrong reasons.
In her town the Meals on Wheels deliverer was also required to actually see the recipient when dropping off.
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