I live in the Rochester Area...and it sounds like a good fit for you! I am not too sure about your husbands field but I do know from experience there are tons and tons of social service/ non-profit jobs in the rochester area. One of the huge employers of this is Hillside Family of Agencies which assists children primarily and familes in crisis situations in a variety of ways (
Hillside Family of Agencies) There are also a ton more listed everyday on careerbuilder.com if that doesn't sound like anything you're into. I would stick in the park avenue neighborhood or the nieghborhood of the arts. They are next to each other and are pretty much bordered by university avenue, winton road, monroe avenue, and alexander street. anything in that box will fit your criteria. You are in a fun nieghborhood with lots of cafe's, restaurants, coffee shops, and little boutiques. All summer long there are live concerts. Each summer Rochester hosts the International Jazz Fest which is famous and attracts a lot of people. On university ave is an Art Gallery and lots of art related stuff. Rochester is very affordable. You can rent an apartment in that area for anywhere from 500-1200. As far as buying houses in those nieghborhoods you can get a decend house for 70k. A really nice house (3 BR) for 70k-120 and you can get an extremely nice house for around 175-200k. Taxes are relatively not too high in comparision to some of NYS.
Nothnagle.com - Rochester's Full Service REALTOR® is a good housing website. search Rochester SE as the towns, as this is where you will find these houses. for each house there is a map and just make sure it is in or around that square of streets. I hope I have been of some help and I hope you move here!