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Old 11-09-2014, 11:00 AM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 8,512,584 times
Reputation: 7542

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^^^ Yep, you won't go far in a small town with city-like rudeness or contempt. Be polite, very, very polite.
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Old 11-24-2014, 08:29 PM
 
74 posts, read 57,151 times
Reputation: 78
In God we trust, everyone else keep their hands where we can see them.
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Old 11-24-2014, 11:40 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,017 posts, read 18,069,877 times
Reputation: 32353
Quote:
Originally Posted by BusyMeAK View Post
Let me rearrange a bit what was said in the previous post, and add some emphasis.


- that actually means that locals expect newcomers to
- even if you are not religious, just spend half of your Sunday to please locals;
- even if you can't distinguish football from volleyball, and even if you know you'll have a nervous breakdown after the band's performance, remember, locals are more important than you, so be in compliance;
- once again, go show that you are ready to waste your weekend in order to make them happy;
- and be prepared for huge emergency bill because your city stomach is (by definition) worthless since it can't digest what locals eat. And, you will be laughed at. Behind your back, of course. In you face, they will probably be howdy-do.

Remember, newcomer's perceived worth is zero, zilch, none. So shut up, and keep silent, unless you are ready to praise everything that you see, from ugly clothes to a habit of burning trash in the woodstoves in the densely populated neighborhoods:


The last is critical.
So he emphasizes it even harder:
He is just a bit too gentle in describing what they will do. They will bite.
Basically, they disrespect a newcomer by definition; a newcomer is expected to respect everything locals do.
They hear pretty well if you fart in you own home, though. Even thought they don't care.



Translating: "quite a bit" can mean 10, 15, 30 years, or a lifetime. "Gentle" means that after 30 years of watching how ravens feast on your neighbor's garbage that he throws on your lot, you can say to another neighbor (quietly, smiling, while bringing him 9 out of 10 zucchinis that grew in your vegetable garden) something like "I think I was so stupid for last 30 years that I didn't take on removing Jim's trash... He is so active in the community, he is constantly busy with fairs, bands, sports, church etc. Oh, how I'm ashamed of my inattentiveness!"


All of the above should sink well in the mind of a person who plans to move to a small town. Maybe it's better to leave small towns with no fresh blood (it's like feeding spiders in a jar). It would be interesting to watch what happens in 50 years.

Basically, a person thinking about moving to a small town, must ask him/herself: am I ready to sacrifice my personality? Because it's what will be demanded. Think of what you can (theoretically) get in return. ROI is very low in many cases.



People value intercultural exchange because it lets them learn how to do things faster and better. Those who cant's learn lose in competition.

I wonder, how many of people who will agree with ozarksboy call themselves democrats?
I am a city dweller by preference and by choice. So why I am reading this thread at all? General interest and a curiosity to understand things I am not already familiar with.

So it's odd (being that we both prefer city ways) that your post struck me as especially obnoxious. No wonder small town people reacted negatively to you. Clearly you are not a good fit with a small town. Your contempt for small town people and their ways is too heavy to be veiled, so a negative reaction is inevitable. You insist on getting overly literal in rebutting Ozark Boy's suggestions instead of trying to absorb the essence, or the main idea, from them.
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Old 11-25-2014, 01:24 PM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 8,512,584 times
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LMAO, if anything, a small town lets you keep your personality. We're all, um, unique.
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Old 11-25-2014, 10:39 PM
 
74 posts, read 57,151 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GregW View Post
The best thing to do when you move to a small town is introduce yourself to the postmaster, the sheriff (local cops), the grocer, the hardware store owner and, if applicable, the preacher. Then show up for breakfast at the local diner for a couple of Saturdays in a row. Let people know you are there.

Then sit back and answer their questions politely. DO NOY MAKE SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO IMPROVE THE PLACE! Eventually they will start the conversation and it will continue for as long as you stay.
There is a elderly widow about a mile from me that lives in a old farm house on a large farm. She inherited a bunch of money from rich relatives who passed on and then later her husband who was pretty well off. Every single morning at her place she hires a chef from local restaurants to cook free breakfast for anyone who shows up and wants it. Not just coffee and toast type stuff either. Five and seven course full on meals. Even New York strip and eggs etc etc.....


Did everyone hear me correctly?!


FREE BREAKFAST at the widows house ANYTIME you want it every single day.


Sometimes the Sheriffs Department sends drifters passing through the area there while they stay and make sure they behave themselves and only take what is offered. I know several people who lost their job and home go there too as well as anyone else who wants to come.
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Old 11-28-2014, 09:57 AM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 8,512,584 times
Reputation: 7542
^^^ That is so cool, I hope it's a true story!

Another rule, when you are driving on a snowy road and you see someone out shoveling their driveway (me) you slow down so you don't splash them. If it's an out of townie, they're just checkin' you out LOL.
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Old 11-30-2014, 07:16 AM
 
Location: NW Nevada
14,530 posts, read 11,954,295 times
Reputation: 13551
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
I am a city dweller by preference and by choice. So why I am reading this thread at all? General interest and a curiosity to understand things I am not already familiar with.

So it's odd (being that we both prefer city ways) that your post struck me as especially obnoxious. No wonder small town people reacted negatively to you. Clearly you are not a good fit with a small town. Your contempt for small town people and their ways is too heavy to be veiled, so a negative reaction is inevitable. You insist on getting overly literal in rebutting Ozark Boy's suggestions instead of trying to absorb the essence, or the main idea, from them.
Lmao. Thank you! Took the words right out me mouth ya did. Couldn't have said it better. Your take that the attitude portrayed by the person you rebutted is ...unappreciated...by we country folk , is spot on mate. Nothing but lofty egalitarianism, such as sets our teeth on edge and brings our hackles up.

This notion the poster put forth, that we all spend half our Sunday rubbing elbows at Church and can't discuss anything deeper than the local high school sports teams is quite annoying as well. If one blows into town with such an attitude, the reception would be quite...cold....indeed! Putting forth this air of being from the city, and therefore , somehow, being superior in intellect and world view, is the stereotype for we rural/ranch/farm folks.

Thank you, again, for your words. It refreshes my willingness to give folks a chance.
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