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Old 08-09-2009, 10:47 PM
 
1,255 posts, read 2,806,428 times
Reputation: 957

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You might be a redneck if....
Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife.
Guilty
2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations.
Guilty
3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.
Guilty with Mom and Wife both.
4. You've never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket.
Guilty plus Coffee Cans and Bread Ties.
5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.
Guilty catch heck about it every year but figured out this year its the start of Squirrel season.
6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.
Guilty but have aqlso used Oak Leaves and have Stems up my B Hole.Had Brush Fire one time had to send my Son over to the next ridge to get Leaves.
7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.
Kind of drove off Low Water Bridge checking out a Deer.
8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.
Again kind of I got it off the side of the road.
9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.
Guilty just some Dogs you can't help but lose it.
10. You've used the same knife to make bull calves steers and peel apples.
Guilty plus Skinned Coons and cut up Turnip without wiping it off.

hillman
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Old 08-12-2009, 09:14 AM
 
Location: New England
740 posts, read 1,670,844 times
Reputation: 438
You might be a redneck if you have to let the air out of your pickup truck tires to get it in and out of the garage.
You might be a redneck if you take your wife out to dinner by driving her on the four wheeler to the local diner.
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Old 08-12-2009, 09:20 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma(formerly SoCalif) Originally Mich,
13,387 posts, read 16,957,890 times
Reputation: 4611
You might be a redneck if: Your best friends are, your dog "Bo" and you shotgun "Siefus".
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Old 08-12-2009, 04:00 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
34,432 posts, read 43,279,509 times
Reputation: 44078
You name your shotgun?




You give your hunting/fishing group a name like "Team Knock'em Down".
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Old 08-13-2009, 01:14 PM
 
Location: Jacksonville,Florida
3,772 posts, read 9,622,583 times
Reputation: 1982
You might be a redneck if: 1) You expect to see a cattle crossing on Rodeo drive.
2) Your shirt has two too many sleeves.
3) You are confused by 2 being used twice in the above sentence and confused as to where Rodeo Drive is.

Last edited by noland123; 08-13-2009 at 02:43 PM..
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Old 08-21-2009, 11:37 PM
 
Location: Western Hoosierland
18,264 posts, read 7,412,044 times
Reputation: 5943
You might be a redneck if you define fancy restaurant as a truck stop.
You might be a redneck if you drive with a beer in your hand.
You might be a redneck if you love bumper stickers.
You might be a redneck if the shirt you are wearing has more holes than what your age is.
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Old 08-22-2009, 09:30 PM
 
Location: The mountians of Northern California.
1,354 posts, read 5,803,072 times
Reputation: 1301
You might be a redneck if...............
-You total your truck when you hit a bear, but your main concern is whether or not your still eligible for a bear tag that year.
-You plant a tree in a giant pothole your little town has ignored for years. Then act as surprised as the city crew is that shows up the next day to repair the pothole.
-If you cut off the top of your truck, paint it camo, then use clear plastic with a headhole cut out during the rainy weather.
-If you keep your shotgun by the door during duck hunting season, then run out in your boxers to shoot at the ducks you can hear as they pass overhead. And your poor wife has company over at the time.
-Your huntin' dogs hear your truck coming from way down the road and start howling, at all hours of the freakin day.
-Your rule for pets is: If I can't bury it, you can't have it. Words to live by.
-Your ongoing battle with the ground squirrels includes explosives.
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Old 08-22-2009, 10:11 PM
 
88 posts, read 232,682 times
Reputation: 89
You call your neighbors and they call you to find out where everyone's dogs are
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Old 08-22-2009, 10:51 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
14,328 posts, read 19,760,793 times
Reputation: 18436
You might be a redneck if you support Sarah Palin.
You might be a redneck if you look like Todd Palin.
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Old 08-23-2009, 06:25 AM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
34,432 posts, read 43,279,509 times
Reputation: 44078
If you've been teaching school for almost 30 years but you post here that you helped teach a Hunter Safety class this weekend that qualified 29 new hunters for their hunting license (22 kids, 7 adults).
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