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Old 01-19-2010, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Las Vegas, NV
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Do you or has anybody you know ever been a victim to vicious small town rumors/gossip? Can it really destroy some peoples lives and force them to relocate perhaps to a major city or the suburbs of a major metro area?
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Old 01-19-2010, 11:34 AM
 
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If one moves to a small town and doesn't want their life to be the talk of the town, they maybe should live a lifestyle that doesn't make them the talk of the town
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Old 01-19-2010, 12:49 PM
 
Location: Canada
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Yes, I do know some stories like that. Divorces, for instance, are still relatively rare among Mennonites, but back in the 70s were non-existent. I won't go into details, but a woman left a marriage, and while I wouldn't say she was forced to move, there was certainly nothing left for her here. I think she had a bit of a control freak husband - I was a kid when this happened and so have no personal knowledge other than knowing the man who remained in the community and remarried.

But I don't think the woman wanted to stay here. I don't know how her life turned out. My life doesn't revolve around gossip. I know there has to be gossip going on, but I think people pick up a vibe if you are personally not receptive to hearing it, so by the time I hear about things, they've usually been happening for months if not years and I'm not the sort to take joy in other people's sorrows.

However, I should add that my husband and I make a bit of an odd couple, since I am the age of my stepchildren. I suppose we are or were gossiped about. But we live in a modest house, our van has a crack across the windshield which we don't bother getting fixed since the gravel roads will most assuredly result in another crack.

We don't have a big-ass truck. And short of my little peculiarity of mucking out the barn on cold winters days wearing a full length fur coat, it's a little difficult to fit me into the category of "trophy wife" - although I have been known to introduce myself as such when strangers mistake me for the daughter.

And we've been married almost twenty years. I suppose if we broke up tomorrow, the naysayers would still say, "I told you it would never last."
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Old 01-21-2010, 05:17 PM
 
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This is one reason I moved.I was writing a girl in another town.There was a woman at the Post Office reading my Mail.

A girl told me this woman was spreading what I was writing I said your kidding? She told me word for word what I had written.

I had no choice but to tell my wife what was going on.It about broke us up but I got a Lawyer and got it taken care of.

Oh when I left my Ex for my present wife.I was cornerd by the woman at the Post Office told how Bad I was leaving such a nice girl for another woman.Plus it gave me troubles at the Local Bank.

hillman
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Old 01-21-2010, 06:01 PM
 
Location: Neither here nor there
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That's the way it is in small towns. Gossip is a way of life in small towns and many people in them will go to great lengths to find out everything they can about their neighbors.

Ten years ago I was working in a nursing home in a very small town, having moved there for the job. My mail was delivered to a POB and I routinely dumped the junk mail into the trash before I left the Post Office after picking up my mail. An older woman was admitted to the nursing home for rehab and when I first met her and introduced myself to her, she said, "Oh, now I know who you are." I looked at her quizzically and she continued, "I've seen your name on the mail you throw away at the Post Office and I've been wondering who you were."

All I can say is that I'm glad my throw-away mail wasn't from companies selling sex toys.
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Old 01-21-2010, 06:22 PM
 
Location: Memphis, TN Metro Area
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Unfortunately, gossip is going to be an issue in most small towns, and this is based on my personal experience. I grew up in a very small town, and the main form of recreation there seemed to be gossiping about who had a drinking problem, who was having sex with whom, and so on.

It's never gotten the point where it's destroyed my life or anything, but I have seen people move out of a small town just to get away from the gossip.

I should also add that there are places around larger cities where gossip can be an issue as well. When we lived right outside of Detroit, MI (not exactly a small town), we had neighbors that could not stop gossiping about each other, and it really led to some negative feelings, several people moving away, and many instances of drama that weren't really needed.
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Old 01-21-2010, 11:06 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas, NV
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jellicoe13 View Post
Unfortunately, gossip is going to be an issue in most small towns, and this is based on my personal experience. I grew up in a very small town, and the main form of recreation there seemed to be gossiping about who had a drinking problem, who was having sex with whom, and so on.

It's never gotten the point where it's destroyed my life or anything, but I have seen people move out of a small town just to get away from the gossip.

I should also add that there are places around larger cities where gossip can be an issue as well. When we lived right outside of Detroit, MI (not exactly a small town), we had neighbors that could not stop gossiping about each other, and it really led to some negative feelings, several people moving away, and many instances of drama that weren't really needed.
It almost seems as if gossip is inescapable. I really think it comes more out of pure boredom then being in a small town. I think its more prevalent in small towns because there is often less things to do to pre-occupy yourself

IMO gossip in big cities tends to be confined to the workplace, or tightly knit neighborhoods or suburbs where everybody is close

A great example IMO is Celebration, Florida a wealthy suburb southwest of Orlando. Despite being part of a major metro area gossip runs rampant because the community is so tight-knit and everybody knows everybody there
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Old 01-22-2010, 12:06 AM
 
Location: Middle America
37,131 posts, read 43,052,244 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marmac View Post
If one moves to a small town and doesn't want their life to be the talk of the town, they maybe should live a lifestyle that doesn't make them the talk of the town
Meh. Anybody who is meanspirited and manipulative can start rumors that have no truth to them, and cause serious damage to a person's reputation, depending upon what kind of power that person wields in a community. This can definitely seriously damage quality of life, and it may have nothing to do with lifestyles or "deserving it." To pretend that there are no baseless vendettas in small towns is pretty shortsighted. People trump things up no matter the size of your community. Let's not be all Pollyanna about it.
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Old 01-22-2010, 06:15 AM
 
4,454 posts, read 5,842,627 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DavieJ89 View Post
Do you or has anybody you know ever been a victim to vicious small town rumors/gossip? Can it really destroy some peoples lives and force them to relocate perhaps to a major city or the suburbs of a major metro area?
well I lived in a small town and hated the gossip, and infact some of the rumours about me was not true at all.

Anyway it is one of the main reasons why I left the small town.
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Old 01-22-2010, 06:47 AM
 
Location: USA
1,899 posts, read 4,199,259 times
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^ LOL. I'm sure it's only small towns that contain gossipy people. Hard to believe some are so thin-skinned that they would actually pick up and relocate, due to gossip? Pssshhh........sounds like they didn't like it there to begin with.

I don't mind being gossiped about, it gives lazy people something to do.....hehe
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