Another meeting people in SLC thread (this one is a little different) (Sandy: renting, lofts)

[sefnar]

I'm 30. I have an opportunity to move to SLC. I've actually lived there for a few months, but that was a long time ago. I'm single again and on the prowl. I want to meet people, find someone special, and make some real friends. I'm fairly successful in a pretty cool industry. I'm attractive, educated, social, etc. I'm also very non-religious. I grew up Mormon, actually. But I've been around that enough to know that I don't want any part of it or any other religion in my life.

Here's the thing. I'm kind of a yuppie. It's not a pejorative, it's just the lifestyle I like to live. I enjoy taking care of myself and being in a certain type of environment / aesthetic. If I was in another city, I would most likely end up in an area like Draper. I like to be around new development, and I like living in a relatively new house. I like the upscale thing.

Now, from what I've been able to tell, Draper is the place for me. Except that in Salt Lake, Draper sounds very homogeneously Mormon. This is where it seems to fall apart for me. I want to have a real, active social life there. It has been my experience that in Utah, being in Mormon really sticks you in the in-group. And everyone else is in the out-group. There's a real division there, with not a lot of overlap or tolerance from either side. It's understandable, but sad.

What I've noticed, is that people who would typically be a lot like me in other places seem like they generally wind up Mormon in Salt Lake. In other words, my potential peer group seems like it's almost entirely Mormon in SLC, where it wouldn't be in other cities. If that is the case and it's not just a limitation of my knowledge, then it's a non-starter for me. I work with a diverse crowd and am tolerant of other's views. But, in my experience, you get to a certain level in the relationship with Mormons and it stops there if your views diverge. I don't want relationships that are stuck at the surface. I want genuine friendships. My own experience has netted lots of acquaintances, but no quality friendships with them.

Maybe because it seems like I'm very similar to them at first, but then you dig a little deeper and find out that my views are more liberal (I'm moderate), I like to drink (OMG! wine with dinner!) and even get a little rowdy sometimes, I'm career-oriented, and am very non-religious. And I'm 30, still not married, and my Tahoe is very un-full of kids.

I know some will say, ok, move to Sugarhouse. It's really liberal over there. That's fine, I appreciate the open-mindedness that seems to prevail there, but I'm not entirely liberal, and it's just not my scene from what it sounds like. Draper sounds like it could be, unless the people there aren't.

So, that's a big ball of generalizations I know, but they seem to be confirmed over and over again, both from my reading and research, as well as my (brief) experience there.

Also, how do you meet like-minded people in SLC? I've been to quite a few of the bars. Overall, they didn't seem to attract the type of crowd that I usually hang with. I'm not much of a beer drinker. I'm not really in to sports. There doesn't seem to be any nice, clean bars for the young professional set. I came away feeling like bars in SLC were generally run-down or seedy. Some were even sleazy. Church is a no-go, obviously. What other ways (besides online) are there in SLC?

I would appreciate your thoughts/advice/corrections.

[newtoutah]

And u want to move to Utah why?? lol

[VC dreamer]

Meeting like minded people out here, and making friends that share your interests, is not that hard. My DH and I have made several good friends since we've been here.
Just be yourself. Do the things that you enjoy. You'll meet a lot of other people that you'll have things in common with.
We met two of our closest friends, on a Sunday ride out to Wendover, when they were also riding out there on their Harleys.
It's been my experience that people of like minds, and interests, tend to gravitate towards others of like minds, and interests.

[SouthernBelleInUtah]

If you like classical music, there's a group of young professionals that meets for some of the performances (maybe all, but not sure) and has drinks after, or something like that. Maybe dinner first? Anyway, it's a 25-45 y/o group, I think. As has been noted over and over, volunteer for something you like or believe in - you'd be surprised how many friends you make that way. I go to an exercise class and have made friends there. Sugar House is not all hippy-dippy liberal, either. Come spend some time actually in the area.

[DOUBLE H]

I don't live in Utah but am only twenty miles away from the border. Have you ever checked out the Stansbury Park area? It's twenty miles or so west of Salt Lake and ten miles from Tooele. I have friends who have been out there for over ten years now and really like it out there. They are non LDS, and a few of their friends are as well. It's a new community; some real pretty places out there but I'm not sure what the houses sell for.

[kaytidid]

Originally Posted by DOUBLE H

I don't live in Utah but am only twenty miles away from the border. Have you ever checked out the Stansbury Park area? It's twenty miles or so west of Salt Lake and ten miles from Tooele. I have friends who have been out there for over ten years now and really like it out there. They are non LDS, and a few of their friends are as well. It's a new community; some real pretty places out there but I'm not sure what the houses sell for.

Yep! I second Stansbury Park!! Love living here. There are some very nice new upscale homes and it is a very open minded community. Tooele County itself is a bit of a sleepy area, but downtown isn't a hard commute by any means. Probably would take you less time from Stansbury as it would from Draper. Right now homes are running from around 200K to upwards of 350K..depending on the location (lake front is more expensive, of course) and size of the home/lot.

[eggalegga]

I think downtown, converted loft living would suit you. Although I hear that downtown is quite dead at night. You could probably seek out some social interaction with the people you work with. Also maybe finding some more intellectual college students at the U to hang out with. Draper seems too far away from the "action" for your liking.

[5280milehiguy]

I agree that Draper is too far away from what you are seeking. You are best suited in Downtown or even Park City. What exactly is there to do in Draper? How is it suitable for a single person? I can't answer those questions, because people simply are not single there, you will find yourself driving into the downtown area if you go there.

Look downtown for the new converted lofts and condos. Check out The Metro Condos, brand spanking new across from the City Library, and yes they are awesome. Perfect for single living. Then you can walk to the Keys on Main, Tabernacle and that place on the bottom floor of the Wells Fargo Building, what is it Panashe? Try www.panache.net, wine bar, very trendy.

I am in a similar demographic, lived a short while in Holladay, before moving downtown.

[Bridget]

I would second Downtown or Park City. I don't know the social scene since I am married with kids but for what you are describing Draper would not be a very good fit, mostly families.

[JaneyBlu]

I am female, in my mid thirties, not LDS, have a couple of Masters degrees from east coast schools and a bit on the yuppie side. I took a job here last year and posted here with similar curiosities/worries.

I can honestly say that I have had a difficult time fitting in here. I ended up renting a home on the Draper/Sandy boarder and realize that I would have been much better off in Salt Lake proper. Here, there are no singles. Everyone is married with children and there is no "nightlife." Don't get me wrong, I have passed the bar hopping days of my life--so that is not what I mean by "nightlife"--but, honestly, everything else you may be interested in doing (including the bars) will be in town.

I am going to be completely honest about my experience here. It has been bitter-sweet. I have a great job, I am well paid and I think that it is absolutely beautiful here...but I have had trouble meeting people with whom I have anything in common. Even the people I have managed to meet with whom I have something in common are, for the most part, married and aren't up for the same social engagement that I am. They just don't have the same time to spend socializing.

I'm actually really lonely here. Needless to say, it has also been difficult meeting eligible men. It seems that everyone I meet is either married, Mormon or a mountain man--none of which work for me.

I think that most singles that move here realize that the majority of people in this state are LDS and marry relatively young. What I didn't anticipate was that most of the non LDS single men in their 30's seem to be mountain men who are here for the supreme snow, mountain biking, hiking, camping and other outdoor sports...which are all great hobbies, just not what I am into. I'm more of the martini and jazz type. There just aren't many men with the same interests.

There are, of course, plenty of non LDS men that are into the beer, pool, nascar and country music scene...but, again, that isn't me.

There are also plenty of divorced men with children who are looking to connect with someone. As someone else once said in another city-data thread, many of these men get married very young, then grow up and realize that they married the wrong person for the wrong reasons...and then they get divorced. Many of them are, of course, LDS. Some, however, are not...but they still have children, which isn't exactly ideal for a single female looking to have a family of her own.

At this point, I am seriously considering seeking a new job opportunity out of the state. If I were married with a family of my own, I'd stay in a heartbeat. I really do love the environment. I just feel that the chances of me meeting someone that I have a lot in common with are slim.