happy to be out of Salt Lake (2009, to rent)

[blossom4792]

Hmm, interesting. I lived in SLC as a child in the late 70s/80s and I have visited since then. I just believe that your experience living in a place can differ ... depending on a lot of things internal to you and external to you and just ... "chance". The last time I was in SLC I was in a place like "Supercuts" (or a competitor) trying to get the tangles out of my daughter's hair. I was feeling anti-social, minding my own business, and everyone wanted to chat with me, find out where I was from, etc. Then I was at my mother's house, and neighborhood (preschool) children were just coming in the front door, walking through the house without parents in sight. I was shocked! I thus assumed that Salt Lake was friendly and trusting, but maybe it isn't. I have no clue based on these anecdotal experiences. I digress. I don't know if Salt Lake is friendly or unfriendly - I tend to find that a lot of my childhood friends have done just horribly staying there. But it just depends and you might fit in or not fit in. Or you might be in the right neighhood for yourself or not. Etc. So much depends - frame of mind, socioeconomics, luck, chance.

[irman]

I figured out a long time ago that situations are handled in 3 steps.
1 - you abhor it
2 - you condone it
3 - you embrace it.
I have lived here now since 1996 and until a few years ago, when I was diagnosed with a severe case of Vietnam PTSD, always thought that I could never get past step 2.
Until I attended the wonderful VA center here and figured out that I could not change past step 2, because of MY attitude.
Suffering, because I felt to be a victim, was not going to change the rest of the people around me, so I finally was able to look at things with a different view point.
As an LDS prophet stated, develop a tolerance for other ideas and thus people as a whole.
Today, I like and still dislike certain people, and I am not alone in this predicament. We have lived in several parts of the world, and found it very similar wherever we lived. Bad apples all over, but we also noted more good apples than bad apples.
So if you leave and have a bad taste for what happened here, it may be YOU who would not accept that not all is going your way every time ....
Look at the bright side of all things.
If a person says that coffee is not good due to the amount of caffeine in there, tell them that you get your *high* drinking it hot, while many LDS people get theirs drinking it cold ....
OTOH, our kids were mostly in their teens and twenty's, when we moved here. Then they finished college and couldn't get out of here fast enough (they grew up in Cali and in Europe), but ...
They are all back here now, in the same area they abhorred in the past ....
Go figure ....
LBNL, why am I here ... ? Never marry a girl from Utah who is related to every Tom, Dick and Harry you see in the streets, if you never want to end up here ....
After 38 years of bliss, I still can not figure out what she is all about .....
nuff sed.

[Keliko]

I am very happy for you that you have found a place where you love and enjoy.

I am having the some of the same problems that you've had. The strange culture, the "us versus" them attitude, the stiff attitudes, the weather, the lack of diversity/culture, and nightlife. I have met some wonderful people here, but I can't speak for most, there are lots with the "I am better than you" attitude.

Salt Lake does have its good side though, I love the nature that surrounds it, the air is better than most states, traffic is not too bad, there is a steady work economy, schools are pretty good, most neighborhoods are pretty safe, etc...

I am planning to move out of Utah too, once I get enough money saved up/finish up school to buy a home either in Austin, TX or Phoenix, AZ. I love the sun, I love the heat. This winter is going to be a hard one for me since I was planning of moving out this year. But what can you do? In 2010, I am out of here.

[kaytidid]

I have lived all over and the "I am better than you" attitude can happen anywhere. It is a personal trait, not a cultural one. Most people are generally very nice here. However, it is a state with various types of people...just like the rest of the country. I have lived here many years and haven't come across the "us vs them" thing. Maybe I live in a bubble...maybe I just view things a little differently...or maybe it just hasn't happened to me? I love the sun and the heat too. Winters are hard on me, but the summers here make it worth it.

Of course, Utah isn't for everyone, and everyone deserves to be where they are happy. What bothers me are the people that come on this site to trash Utah. Not just give their opinions, but rip it up oneside and down another. While Utah might not work for everyone, lets remember that it is home (and happily so) to many and try to be respectful. After all, when you finally find the place you want to be, you wouldn't like it if it was constantly put down all the time either.

This article was just in our local paper. It is about being a newcomer to Tooele, although I would expect it is appropriate to Utah in general as well.

http://tooeletranscript.com/pages/fu...t_right&open=&

[cinnabon]

Originally Posted by kaytidid

I have lived all over and the "I am better than you" attitude can happen anywhere. It is a personal trait, not a cultural one. Most people are generally very nice here. However, it is a state with various types of people...just like the rest of the country. I have lived here many years and haven't come across the "us vs them" thing. Maybe I live in a bubble...maybe I just view things a little differently...or maybe it just hasn't happened to me? I love the sun and the heat too. Winters are hard on me, but the summers here make it worth it.

Of course, Utah isn't for everyone, and everyone deserves to be where they are happy. What bothers me are the people that come on this site to trash Utah. Not just give their opinions, but rip it up oneside and down another. While Utah might not work for everyone, lets remember that it is home (and happily so) to many and try to be respectful. After all, when you finally find the place you want to be, you wouldn't like it if it was constantly put down all the time either.

This article was just in our local paper. It is about being a newcomer to Tooele, although I would expect it is appropriate to Utah in general as well.

Tooele Transcript Bulletin - News, Classifieds, Events and Businesses in Tooele, Utah - Adventures

well said! I haven't been here long, but I have met a lot of people, and I can't figure out what people are talking about with the "us vs. them" or snobby attitude either. The LDS folks I have met could not be nicer - and I can read people well enough to know it's genuine, not phoniness. And the non-LDS people, same thing, almost everyone is super nice.

Perhaps it's different in the suburbs, where these so called "barbie doll" housewives supposedly exist? I dunno, it's a complete mystery to me.

[lemon&lime]

I only experienced the "better than" attitudes from Mormons. From what little I know about their culture, they are inculcated with this belief from childhood; ie, that they are a chosen people with specialized knowledge pertaining to salvation that regular Christians don't have, making them a kind of elite group religiously. Their attitudes are part of the culture, period. As I have mentioned on this board, I was raised in Midland, Texas and come from a wealthy upper middle class "oil business" family. I spent my whole childhood around people who thought they were a little bit better than others; I am totally familiar with the attitude. My mother is German; I was raised with "German pride" too. In general I would not behave or treat people the way the Mormons do though. I know better, frankly. This is going to offend some people on this board and I'm really sorry. Salt Lake itself and the Sugarhouse areas are pretty benign. But lookout once you get anywhere south of Murray; the people just think they are all that and a bag of chips. I even thought about picking up a Louis Vuitton bag at one point so I'd look more like them. I dyed my hair blonde, too. The Mormons in the suburbs do think they are better than others, period. Though sure there are snobs everywhere. Texas is filled with them. Here in New Mexico we have Santa Fe... but if you visit, people are so down to earth, even though the town has all these million dollar properties and celebrity locals. One could say that everywhere nowadays you would find people who think they are a little bit better than others. But I think you would be hard pressed to find an area filled with people who consider themselves to be spiritually elite. Now that I am gone I actually have no problem with it. The Light is pouring down on the whole planet though; not just the Place. I wonder if the Mormons are aware of that.

[kaytidid]

You know, it IS possible that they do find themselves spiritually elite. I don't know...I hadn't thought about it in that aspect. I don't believe that they do, but obviously cannot speak for anyone to verify nor deny that point.

I do know that even if that were true, it doesn't affect me any. Really. I don't care if you think you are better than me. I don't care if you think your heaven is better than mine. My faith is what I believe. I believe that if you are a good person you will go to heaven. That is all I care about. I know I will be there. I know my family will be there...so really, if they think they are better than I am...they can keep on believing it.

Sorry...didn't mean to bring this thread off topic on a religious tangent....

I, also, am very German, so I can totally relate to the German pride, stubbornness, ect. I guess that is why I *don't* care. I am very secure with who I am. If someone doesn't like me, or wants to change me, or thinks they are better than me, I really could give a rat's ***. Like me for me, or don't like me at all!

[finmqa1]

Wow, props to all you SLC folks for not blowing up at Cathy's experience in your fine city. I too live in ABQ, and while I too think people here are friendly, we tend to jump all over them when they bad mouth our city. Not saying it is right or wrong, but I definitely prefer the gracious way you all have approached the criticism. Cathy, I also think you did the right thing, if you don't like where you are living there is a solution................move! Many folks continue to stay where they are complain about their situation, at least you did something about it.

[mitsuturbo]

Originally Posted by catrinac

I only experienced the "better than" attitudes from Mormons. From what little I know about their culture, they are inculcated with this belief from childhood; ie, that they are a chosen people with specialized knowledge pertaining to salvation that regular Christians don't have, making them a kind of elite group religiously. Their attitudes are part of the culture, period. As I have mentioned on this board, I was raised in Midland, Texas and come from a wealthy upper middle class "oil business" family. I spent my whole childhood around people who thought they were a little bit better than others; I am totally familiar with the attitude. My mother is German; I was raised with "German pride" too. In general I would not behave or treat people the way the Mormons do though. I know better, frankly. This is going to offend some people on this board and I'm really sorry. Salt Lake itself and the Sugarhouse areas are pretty benign. But lookout once you get anywhere south of Murray; the people just think they are all that and a bag of chips. I even thought about picking up a Louis Vuitton bag at one point so I'd look more like them. I dyed my hair blonde, too. The Mormons in the suburbs do think they are better than others, period. Though sure there are snobs everywhere. Texas is filled with them. Here in New Mexico we have Santa Fe... but if you visit, people are so down to earth, even though the town has all these million dollar properties and celebrity locals. One could say that everywhere nowadays you would find people who think they are a little bit better than others. But I think you would be hard pressed to find an area filled with people who consider themselves to be spiritually elite. Now that I am gone I actually have no problem with it. The Light is pouring down on the whole planet though; not just the Place. I wonder if the Mormons are aware of that.

You will find that many mormons who have not been to utah, upon visiting.. state that the "utah mormons" have a different attitude and many who are foreign to utah rapidly develop a distaste for this different attitude. I have known plenty of LDS people outside of utah, and i have to say.. they are NOTHING like a large percentage (NOT ALL!) of those i lived around or dealt with in utah.

[irman]

Originally Posted by mitsuturbo

I have known plenty of LDS people outside of utah, and i have to say.. they are NOTHING like a large percentage (NOT ALL!) of those i lived around or dealt with in utah.

I second that, but if you read my post above (#22) on how you get used to everything .... even hanging .....

Darn, I even have a truck now ....