Having a hard time in Utah (Herriman, Portage: military, moving, relocating)

[kaytidid]

Thanks. I don't think I am, but I know people have told me before that was their first impression of me. I am really friendly, but extremely shy..which can come off as being snotty sometimes. Odds are I would never make the first move to approach anyone. I am always happy to chat with someone that approaches me though.

This, of course, goes back to people saying that LDS are unfriendly. Really, though, how can anyone judge someone to be unfriendly just because they don't say hi or make nice with you. A person cannot begin to know everything about someone else right off the bat. Like people that judge me as being a snob, when in reality, I am super shy.

[nygeenie]

Originally Posted by irman

Do you attend a church of your OWN belief ?
If not, why even mention that you are a Christian ?
I have friends who are NOT LDS and religion has absolutely NO bearing on our friendship.
What religion do they claim to have ?... I have absolutely no idea !!
If you do attend some church, and you still feel like an *outsider*,
I have no clue why you would feel that way.

Do you have a hobby other than something related to alcohol, since you did mention that used to tend bar and that you frequent private clubs.

Living in a place where tobacco and alcohol is frowned upon by the majority of inhabitants, was a bad choice for you in this case.

Somewhere, I still have no clue why it is necessary to have tobacco or alcohol around in order to have a good time.

As I have mentioned numerous times in other posts ...
If you behave like an outsider, other people will treat you like an outsider.
I actually made a more *crass* statement, but ..... the same meaning.

So here my advice:
Keep a smile on your face always, especially when you meet people.
Makes them wonder what you are up to.
Show some interest in what other people may think.
Join some volunteer group, does wonders for your own attitude !!!

irman,

With that attitude you are proving this girl's point !!. She went out of her way to make it clear that she had nothing against Mormons, and yet you are questioning her beliefs(which BTW, she doesn't need to go to church to be a good Christian.) and giving her the third degree about alcohol? Get off your high horse! There is nothing wrong with drinking by mature, responsible adults. It is their choice! And you are wondering why she feels so isolated, it is people like you.

I joined this website just to say that piece..geez.

Kerbear,
we are relocating there in a few months. I'm from Long Island and my husband is from UT. I think we should get a group of us together, a nice Sunday BBQ!

[SouthernBelleInUtah]

Originally Posted by nygeenie

irman,

........................
Kerbear,
we are relocating there in a few months. I'm from Long Island and my husband is from UT. I think we should get a group of us together, a nice Sunday BBQ!

I volunteer my patio and BBQ!

[LostinDurbanDeep]

Originally Posted by nygeenie

irman,

With that attitude you are proving this girl's point !!. She went out of her way to make it clear that she had nothing against Mormons, and yet you are questioning her beliefs(which BTW, she doesn't need to go to church to be a good Christian.) and giving her the third degree about alcohol? Get off your high horse! There is nothing wrong with drinking by mature, responsible adults. It is their choice! And you are wondering why she feels so isolated, it is people like you.

I joined this website just to say that piece..geez.

Kerbear,
we are relocating there in a few months. I'm from Long Island and my husband is from UT. I think we should get a group of us together, a nice Sunday BBQ!

Sadly, this condescending attitude is somewhat common among a subset of the natives - If you drink alcohol at all then your life must revolve around it.

Having said that, there are many great things about Utah and SLC and I'm (usually) happy I moved here.

[osugirl2]

Originally Posted by nygeenie

irman,

With that attitude you are proving this girl's point !!. She went out of her way to make it clear that she had nothing against Mormons, and yet you are questioning her beliefs(which BTW, she doesn't need to go to church to be a good Christian.) and giving her the third degree about alcohol? Get off your high horse! There is nothing wrong with drinking by mature, responsible adults. It is their choice! And you are wondering why she feels so isolated, it is people like you.

I joined this website just to say that piece..geez.

Kerbear,
we are relocating there in a few months. I'm from Long Island and my husband is from UT. I think we should get a group of us together, a nice Sunday BBQ!

count me in!

[Kermusique]

Originally Posted by kaytidid

Oh no worries. I certainly didn't think you were. I was just thinking out loud for some people that do nothing but come on here JUST to trash Utah and those that live here. It is okay to be homesick! I certainly was for quite a few years after I moved here. By the way, I have extended family that lives in Upstate New York.

really? whereabouts? I'm from around Albany/Schenectady/Saratoga Springs, NY.

[Kermusique]

Originally Posted by nygeenie

irman,

With that attitude you are proving this girl's point !!. She went out of her way to make it clear that she had nothing against Mormons, and yet you are questioning her beliefs(which BTW, she doesn't need to go to church to be a good Christian.) and giving her the third degree about alcohol? Get off your high horse! There is nothing wrong with drinking by mature, responsible adults. It is their choice! And you are wondering why she feels so isolated, it is people like you.

I joined this website just to say that piece..geez.

Kerbear,
we are relocating there in a few months. I'm from Long Island and my husband is from UT. I think we should get a group of us together, a nice Sunday BBQ!

sounds like a good idea! I'm kerbear by the way as well, somehow i made up two names to this site and ended up sticking with this one. i hope you have a nice trip out here!

[Kermusique]

Originally Posted by LostinDurbanDeep

Sadly, this condescending attitude is somewhat common among a subset of the natives - If you drink alcohol at all then your life must revolve around it.

Having said that, there are many great things about Utah and SLC and I'm (usually) happy I moved here.

That is pretty said. I may have a glass of wine with dinner but I don't need it to have a good time. Also, why should my religious beliefs be attacked they are just different. I didn't attack the person that questioned my faith and beliefs.

[kaytidid]

Originally Posted by Kermusique

really? whereabouts? I'm from around Albany/Schenectady/Saratoga Springs, NY.

They are from a little town called Portageville. Letchworth State Park sits adjacent to them.

[flyinlow]

Originally Posted by kerbear0708

Ok, let me start by saying I moved near the Salt Lake area from Upstate NY. I do have a few friends from work and friends that have moved here when I was younger that I reconnected with. I love my job here, my boyfriend has a good job, we live in a nice neighborhood. I am not Mormon and have nothing against being Mormon but it seems like it is so very hard for me to meet friends. I've been out to 'private clubs' three times since we have been here in July and that wasn't much fun for us either. The people in the private clubs weren't much friendlier in fact much less then the people i don't share beliefs with and i used to be a bartender in NY in a small town whenever you went in you were always welcomed no matter who you were. It's so hard it seems for me to meet people to hang out with and it was never hard for me in NY. I know life is different on the west coast than the east coast but it's starting to feel very alone here. Wish I could meet some other people in semi the same boat that I'm in, or even people from here that sometimes feel like they are displaced. Again I hope noone that reads this thinks I'm saying anything bad about the Mormon religion. I definately respect everyone, but I am a Christian and have my own beliefs and still feel like an outsider so much! Anyway hope someone can maybe chat or send me to a support group LOL, I'm really not trying to be disrespectful but feel like I've been disrespected a little when people in my neighborhood found out I wasn't what they are, maybe I just live in the wrong place, anyway, anyone that can help me out please do! Thank you!

This is a good time of year to meet new friends, everyone is out and about because of the warm weather.
I would suggest looking to participate in an activity you are interested in (bike riding, sailing, car clubs ect.) there are clubs organized to attract new members.
I am a lifelong resident of UT and met a couple that had just moved here from Ohio through a car club we both were members of. This was six years ago and we have become close friends and vacation with each other and share many activities just because of a passion for a certain automobile.