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Old 09-05-2011, 09:38 AM
 
Location: Kallison Ranch, San Antonio,TX.
1,668 posts, read 3,360,826 times
Reputation: 721

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Our new neighbors closed on their home last week but only the Husband is there. His Wife is coming soon (???) siince she is still stationed in England. The Husband moved in he basically brought himself with a few clothes. No Furniture..he bought an Air Mattress at Wal Mart along with a couple of Lawn Chairs. His vehicle is an Oldsmobile Bravada and it has had mechanical problems since he moved from Missiissppi and made the drive to San Antononio. He is still experiencing problems with it.
I made a HUGE mistake by introducing myself to him. As I usually do, I didn't offer amy assistance if he evr needed anything. I've been down that road in the past too many times. Since he moved in he has asked two other neighbors for rides to Wal Mart and HEB, he has asked to borrow a pump for the mattress, a lawnmower, has asked to be towed to Auto Zone,and of course more rides to various places. I sure as hell didn't' buy a new Silverado 6 months ago to act as a tow truck or taxi. If I drove a vehicle with mechanical problems I sure as hell would not have puchased a new home which cost over $200K .
Yestery he came over early while I was still sleeping and asked my Wife if I could give him a ride to AutoZone and HEB. Later in the day while I was out he asked for the Want Ads from our paper which was still on the Driveway. He asked my Wfe to bring them over as soon as she sorted it out. Without hesitation she removed the Want Ads and gave them to him right there and then. This guy sits in his garage waiting for a neighbor to come out and ask for favors. Almost like a Vulture waiting for prey.
One neighbor told me yesterday that he does not want to come out of his home to do yard work since he knows that this guy will be asking for favors.
Maybe I should help him out since it is the Christian thing to do but at the same time I know without a doubt the favor asking won't stop. What he needs to do is bite the cost of taking his vehicle to a local repair shop instead of trying to fix it himself.
I don't think I'm an ******* but it's not any neighbor's job to transport him anywhere.
Oh by the way he has no trouble buying beer.
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Old 09-05-2011, 09:52 AM
 
Location: New Braunfels, TX
6,273 posts, read 9,028,497 times
Reputation: 6375
There's a difference between being neighborly and being abused....and this guy sounds like an abuser. Offer him the name of a reliable mechanic, maybe take him to the grocery store once or twice - and then that's enough, unless you can see that he's REALLY trying to help himself. I've been "close to the sheets" myself in the past, and while my neighbors were great, in return they got things like an oil change, car wash - SOMETHING to "pay back" their kindness.
Your guy has developed a system to simply take and take....and no - it's NOT "unchristian" to tell him to take a hike IMO. Now, I'm saying that without having talked to him, but based on what I've seen of your comments in the past, I'm pretty confident that you've already talked w/him and are pretty clear in the assessment that this guy is just someone looking for *free*.
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Old 09-05-2011, 09:57 AM
 
2,039 posts, read 4,902,982 times
Reputation: 1204
Quote:
Originally Posted by wellguy View Post
Our new neighbors closed on their home last week but only the Husband is there. His Wife is coming soon (???) siince she is still stationed in England. The Husband moved in he basically brought himself with a few clothes. No Furniture..he bought an Air Mattress at Wal Mart along with a couple of Lawn Chairs. His vehicle is an Oldsmobile Bravada and it has had mechanical problems since he moved from Missiissppi and made the drive to San Antononio. He is still experiencing problems with it.
I made a HUGE mistake by introducing myself to him. As I usually do, I didn't offer amy assistance if he evr needed anything. I've been down that road in the past too many times. Since he moved in he has asked two other neighbors for rides to Wal Mart and HEB, he has asked to borrow a pump for the mattress, a lawnmower, has asked to be towed to Auto Zone,and of course more rides to various places. I sure as hell didn't' buy a new Silverado 6 months ago to act as a tow truck or taxi. If I drove a vehicle with mechanical problems I sure as hell would not have puchased a new home which cost over $200K .
Yestery he came over early while I was still sleeping and asked my Wife if I could give him a ride to AutoZone and HEB. Later in the day while I was out he asked for the Want Ads from our paper which was still on the Driveway. He asked my Wfe to bring them over as soon as she sorted it out. Without hesitation she removed the Want Ads and gave them to him right there and then. This guy sits in his garage waiting for a neighbor to come out and ask for favors. Almost like a Vulture waiting for prey.
One neighbor told me yesterday that he does not want to come out of his home to do yard work since he knows that this guy will be asking for favors.
Maybe I should help him out since it is the Christian thing to do but at the same time I know without a doubt the favor asking won't stop. What he needs to do is bite the cost of taking his vehicle to a local repair shop instead of trying to fix it himself.
I don't think I'm an ******* but it's not any neighbor's job to transport him anywhere.
Oh by the way he has no trouble buying beer.

Set the tone now! If you are able by all means go ahead but do not let yourself be taken advantage of. If you are going towards HEB at 1 and he asks at 10 am you state, I am going that direction at 1 and would be happy to drop you off. Or you can say, sorry I will not be out that direction today.
I have a neighbor who is struggling and I did once take her to the grocery store when she asked but I would by no means let it become an expectation. I also loaned her a pan which she asked to borrow and never returned - luckily I lent her my oldest one that I was okay with not having it returned.
Be nice, be neighborly but do not let them take advantage of you.

I always say if I can help someone out and improve their day I will, however there is a limit.
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Old 09-05-2011, 10:06 AM
 
Location: Kallison Ranch, San Antonio,TX.
1,668 posts, read 3,360,826 times
Reputation: 721
I'm going to sound sarcastic but I think the only favor that would be paid back would be a beer and I don't drink.
It is also my understanding that he has walked over a couple of streets asking for help. I wouldn't like it if a complete stranger showed up at my door asking for what he's asking for.
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Old 09-05-2011, 10:11 AM
 
Location: New Braunfels, TX
6,273 posts, read 9,028,497 times
Reputation: 6375
Y'know....has there been any thought given that this might be some kinda scam? Way too much about this guy just seems out of place. Might not be a bad idea to ask for a visit from your local LEO to talk about what's goin' on....
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Old 09-05-2011, 10:38 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
993 posts, read 2,193,168 times
Reputation: 308
Wow, this is crazy. Sounds like the guy needs to pouch up and take care of himself.
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Old 09-05-2011, 10:41 AM
 
117 posts, read 298,859 times
Reputation: 73
Are you sure he's not squatting in the home? Was the home he purchased a foreclosure?
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:22 AM
 
Location: san antonio texas
1,805 posts, read 2,192,397 times
Reputation: 623
ditto on the squatter thing.

help him a few times, but try and attach stipulations with it:

'ill give you a ride if you assist me with washing my cars, mowing my lawn, etc etc'

if he accepts and helps you out, maybe hes just down on his luck?

if he refuses, hes just using you.
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:24 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
409 posts, read 846,946 times
Reputation: 305
Hmmm..this person sounds like a real humdinger. I know if I was in a new neighborhood I'd at least wait a while before asking for favors. If someone offered me a favor I'd take it if I needed it but will surely offer to return the favor. This person needs to learn where the bus stops are so he can take the bus to the store and back. One would think the man has enough $$ to at least call a cab living in a house that expensive. Maybe the rest of the neighbors should make him a sign that reads, "Will work for favors". I had a similar experience with a moocher neighbor who even come to borrow toothpicks. I told her to pluck her broom. Something doesn't seem right about this new neighbor.
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:26 AM
 
15,924 posts, read 17,409,634 times
Reputation: 7641
Being taken advantage of would be an understatement in your case.

Tell him from now on you'll refuse to assist him, period.
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