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Old 01-13-2016, 03:03 PM
 
4,268 posts, read 8,354,384 times
Reputation: 1785

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom View Post
Since the parents were able to afford a switch to private school, I'm guessing that affording $20/month for a landline would not have stretched their budget too much.
I doubt it was the cost, it's just not something most people have.

When you're trying to deal with this on a day to day basis, you don't go through a check list. Sure, we're all parenting experts and our kids would NEVER be such victims or NEVER be the bullies, because we're perfect parents. In hindsight. In the thick of it, it's different.

this family was very actively involved in this kid's life, doing everything practical to address the situation, including therapy. That he was depressed or potentially suicidal doesn't excuse the bullies who pushed him over the edge - knowing full well that was likely. The bullies involved knew exactly what they were doing.
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Old 01-13-2016, 03:04 PM
 
4,268 posts, read 8,354,384 times
Reputation: 1785
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
.
Your post is a pathetic representation of illiterate self-righteousness.
Which part is illiterate? Did I make some spelling errors?

Self-righteous? If having compassion and empathy is self-righteous, then I'm guilty as charged.
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Old 01-13-2016, 04:08 PM
Status: "just keep scrolling then?" (set 11 days ago)
 
14,613 posts, read 31,135,787 times
Reputation: 6656
His parents weren't able to control what the bully or anyone else does. None of us have that kind of power or these situations would not be happening. You have to do what YOU can do. In a perfect world, there would be only peace. Instead, anyone who is looking on ( after the fact as we ALL are) and has different ideas for resolving problems is snidely dismissed as a "perfect parent"(sarcasm dripping) who has no empathy or sympathy. Please. No one would ever wish this on anyone.
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:27 PM
 
733 posts, read 863,304 times
Reputation: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chaka View Post
I consider the parents also victims, and in this case, they were very much involved in the child's life (therapy, changing schools etc) and discussed with him the online issues. If you read anything his brother wrote, you'd know that's clear.

These were not absent parents ignoring their child. And they were trying to help their child learn to cope with the bullies (as so many suggest they should have done).

How about the parents of the bullies? They're the ones raising kids who think taunting others is a game, no doubt because the parents are the same.
yeah, id say they were. they should have removed the kid from the online situation and resolved it with the local authorities. they didnt , so theyre to blame. victim... LOL. whatever.
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Old 01-14-2016, 09:23 PM
 
733 posts, read 863,304 times
Reputation: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBaby View Post
Wow. What an entirely heartless reply. Let's hope you never have a child die young.
heartless to hold the parents accountable for not properly monitoring their child's online activities? that monitoring could have saved his life.

right, that's the epitome of heartless

wont have a kid die young because my SO and i have no plans on having kids, sans furry, 4 legged ones.
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Old 01-14-2016, 09:39 PM
 
555 posts, read 396,332 times
Reputation: 630
Quote:
Originally Posted by KM1174 View Post
heartless to hold the parents accountable for not properly monitoring their child's online activities? that monitoring could have saved his life.

right, that's the epitome of heartless

wont have a kid die young because my SO and i have no plans on having kids, sans furry, 4 legged ones.


Of course... You're giving advice about children and parenting, never having had any or having been one.


#fail
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Old 01-15-2016, 03:18 PM
 
Location: San Antonio
206 posts, read 388,745 times
Reputation: 205
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivory Lee Spurlock View Post
I think one of the best things a parent can do for their kids to prevent them from being bullied is to enroll them at a young age in some sort of martial arts school. The younger the better. They will learn to defend theirselves, discipline, confidence, high self esteem, self-respect and they will be respected. Those very traits are what alot of these kids who are bullied lack. The bullies can sense those weaknesses and they will pounce on them in a heartbeat.

Honestly, I can't think of anything better a parent can do to prevent their child from being bullied than to get them in some kind of martial arts program.
I agree with this as well.

I was in karate from age 5 - 13. The discipline, confidence, and self respect/respect for others and life itself is reinforced over and over again. I was not bullied, nor did I bully. They *tried* to bully me, but it only took one try for them to give up. I was class of 2002, 911 was in my senior year and MySpace was kind of a thing, but social media being a part of daily life wasn't really a huge deal yet. I luckily missed out on that.

I am pregnant now and with all I am seeing happening to kids on the news and in prime time, we will definitely put our child in martial arts early, catholic school if we can afford it (that's where I went), and do our best with the rest.
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Old 01-15-2016, 08:00 PM
 
Location: SA
275 posts, read 137,144 times
Reputation: 236
Going to Catholic school wouldn't prevent bullying...there is bullying in all type of environments, heck even among adults.
Martial arts might help when the bullying gets physical, but most of the times is about psicological harrasement, so I dont see it as a perfect solution either.
Laws and regulations making kids and parenst accountable are the way to go imo.
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Old 01-16-2016, 06:36 PM
 
386 posts, read 638,389 times
Reputation: 315
After hearing about this tragedy I am appalled and disgusted by the students at AHD and I am also severely disappointed by this district it has received a lot of hate as of late and it's ALL warranted.
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Old 01-19-2016, 11:01 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
702 posts, read 608,088 times
Reputation: 932
I feel like there is a massive disconnect here. Both sides didn't grow up with social networking over the internet or personal cell phones -- one side says there was nothing that could have been done to stop this but throw the bullies in jail, and the other saying disconnect the victim from all forms of communication entirely.

You know there's a step between, right? On Instagram, and Facebook you can block users from contacting you. It is fairly easy, too. Additionally, you can adjust your security settings where others (who you don't invite) can't view your posts or personal information. As for cell phones, a number can be changed fairly easily as well. And depending on your carrier it may be easier to just block contact from an incoming number.

If someone is talking garbage to you online and you're sick of it you have three options.

#1. Ignore it. The old canard about walking away? Being the bigger person? etc. This is the toughest one to do and takes self respect, self control, and dignity. This is incredibly tough sometimes and it does take its toll if you let it affect you. This is somewhat easier by magnitude online because you can press a power button and go watch TV instead. Harder to do in person.

#2. Block the senders/phone numbers or change accounts. This is the easiest way to deal with online harassment. Deactivate everything is quicker, but if it's less than 100 people bugging you it's better to just block individually so that you can keep all your existing connections. That's it. Connection with harassers severed and you can go about your digital life.

#3. Report the person to the police. If they are breaking a law, then report them and get a restraining order. This is a good option when you feel your life is in danger, or there are revenge-porn sort of situations going on that are clearly 100% illegal.

Sorry, I was bullied in elementary and a lot in middle school. I got my first cell phone at 18 when I went to college. Facebook was invented after I graduated and no one at school had MySpaces. No one is EVER going to tell me that saying "you are a monkey" on an instagram post is more damaging psychologically than having people laugh at you and insult you to your face. Or lay hands on you. You can't block someone in real life with the click of a button. You can't have people not shove you and trip you and call you a piece of **** to your face and just stop it like you can if they were texting you.

Take stock of what is important in life and what makes it worth living. Teach your kids to do the same and how to be the bigger person. If someone tweeted something mean to you on twitter, block them, delete it, and move on with your life.
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